Hi. My boyfriend and I have been going out for a little over three months and we are both quite happy. The thing is, he's told me he won't sleep with me because it's immoral and I don't hold the title of wife. The thing is though, I really want to sleep with him. And when we make out, it seems like he wants to go farther too. He'll kiss my neck all the way down to my chest, push himself against me, and pull me on top of him. I'm not sure what to do. I really want to sleep with him and he seems like he wants to too, so what can I do to let him know how I feel (without saying, "I want to have sex with you." lol)? And am I looking too much into the making out thing, or does it sound like he wants to go father to you guys too? Any help is greatly appreicated! :]
2007-11-28 11:59:01 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think you should really wait a bit before trying anything like that. That's a major thing with major consequences associated with it. And it sounds like you have a good guy if he's not taking advantage of you! Re-access yourself and try and calm down. Don't do something you'll regret later, when all the lovey-dovey feeling has wore off. Respect his values and yourself too! As for the analyzing/making out, it does sound like he wants to, but knows he can't ('cause he doesn't feel it's right). So you are right about that, but be careful! If you still feel like you want to just go for it, then the best thing is to just sit him down and talk with him. Have him explain his feelings and have him tell you why he feels that way. And respect him! Don't worry, when the time and person is right, you'll be able to have sex. But for now, just wait a bit longer. :]
2007-11-29 18:15:34 · answer #1 · answered by riku_fan_girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, since he said that is immoral to him and that you're not his wife. maybe he just wants to wait till hes married. it may seem like he wants to go farther..because he does. but he knows that its not right. but maybe you should talk to your boyfriend once more. just bring it up. tell him that you want to take a step further in the sexual part of the relationship. but if he says no or the same thing. then you just have to deal with it and respect his decision. maybe this time ask him why and more detailed so you have a better understanding.
2007-11-28 12:05:12 · answer #2 · answered by j yanks 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, i think he wants to go far, but he knows the limits according to whatever he believes. don't pressure him... how would you like it if a guy pressured you into having sex? he probably doesn't want to do something that he will later regret, and i think you should consider the same thing. just give him time, and he'll come around. but if you really want to go for it, and you don't want to straight out tell him, give him hints. dress in really sexy lingerie, dark room, couple of candles, you know what i mean. and during your make out session (lol), get touchy, start grinding, whisper sexy little things to him. then when you can feel he's really into you, and you can tell that he wants to go further, take control. say, "come on, let's do it," or something like that. touch his thingy-thingy, do something to turn him on. no straight man can resist! good luck, and use protection!
if that doesn't work, talk to him. find out what the matter is, and why he doesn't want to do it. try to get the reason out of him, and tell him that you want your first time, if it is, to be with the man you love. tell him how much it means to you, and you respect his wishes, but you think it's the right thing to do. talk about protection, because he also might be afraid of starting an unwanted family. and he sounds like a guy that respects women. another guy would have gone straight to business in about 2 days! you're lucky.
just be careful and make wise desicions, ok girl? and give him time... 3 months is a short time, you might want to wait a little longer if he still refuses. but again, good luck!
2007-11-28 12:03:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
ur sexually frustrated, thats normal and its only been three months its good that he wants to wait, it meens ha respects you and wants a good relationship.. but wait a wile more untill he is comftorble when u think its rite dont say anything when yall are making out try going a step further slowly each time and get him comfterble with one step up at a time, dont push it on him just try takin of the shirts and when hes fine with that go a step further and keep doin that untill u get what u want... and men have less controll overthings like that then women ;) thats what my bf did to me i said i would never sleep with him and i just gave into it one step at a time. then i was just like y not? ive done everything else with him!?
2007-11-28 12:10:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here you go. Try having other sexual acts before jumping straight to the home run. Go down on him, then tell him dirty things. Once a guy get's that sort of sexual pleasure, he starts to wonder how the hell it can get better. And it does. And we know it does. Itll work out for you.
Yeah it does sound like you go to far into analysis of making out. Enjoy it and make the first move. Do a little teasing, stripping then do things to him to get him going. Rub around him a little, do all the things girls know guys love.
2007-11-28 12:03:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
well first of all personally i think you should wait a little while longer because 3 months isn't that long to be wanting to have sex. i mean me and my boyfriend waited 7 months... like I'm not saying u have to wait that long but it would be a good idea. OK and when you said he kisses you down to your neck and lays on top of you. maybe hes waiting for you to make the first move. so go head and make it. take off his cloths make him feel wanted if you will. just don't move things to fast
2007-11-28 12:05:18 · answer #6 · answered by ashley c 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Be glad he doesn't want to use you for toilet sex (the #3 of body functions). You're feeling natural urges to take it to the next step, but my advise is to back off the necking, so neither of you get 'worked up'. If he doesn't want you as a wife right now, then he needs to stop teasing you!
2007-11-28 12:03:23 · answer #7 · answered by Empress Jan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any guy going out with a girl wants to have sex with her. Maybe when you are making out, you should start undressing, then he will get the hint.
Basically guys are no good at hints or suggestions, so you may just have to bite that bullet and tell him.
2007-11-28 12:51:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my gosh. How old are you? Do you know how much respect a man gives a woman who abstain from sex? You body is too precious to give out like that after only three months. Think about it, you body is like a pack of gum. Everybody you have sex with you give a piece of gum too. So, your future husband is left with one piece of gum and not the whole pack. Save yourself girl. It's worth it. Less hurt feelings when y'all break up.
2007-11-28 12:05:45 · answer #9 · answered by sarolabelle 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he may say i dont wanna have sex, but inside i'm sure he wants like you want to. so i guess next time try to be more seductive and confident. wear something sexy more than other times in the past and try to make him feel hot so he can react like a man. then if he doesnt want anything, i believe he is not sure about is sexuality.
give hime some time that would work.
2007-11-28 21:35:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋