How would you have dealt with this?

Question

Today I had to check in 40 books and then check out books for 30 kid books because I'm a library aide. There was one very nasty kid who kept making snide remarks about me. The computer wasn't working and I had to type each kid's name in and then check them out, and it was taking a long time. I kept apologizing, and he said "You hear that, she's sorry?" to the person who happened to be checking out their book. I ignored him. He then said "God, you are slow. I could do it faster than you, and I don't know how to work the computer." to which I ignored as well. My breaking point was when I said "I'm really, really sorry. The computer is messing up." He looked at me and said "Are you sure it's not operator error? You seem kind of stupid." I smiled and told him "Shut up or be polite. I'm doing the best that I can. You can leave if you feel like it." He shut up and glared at me. How would you have dealt with it? I wanted to smack him, but I didn't want to get in trouble.

I'm only a student aide, no matter what I say I can't ban him from the library. Grrr, I would have if I could though.

I'm a student aide in the school library, I get credits for it.

Answer 1

Sadly, he probably would've had to digest a book if it were me. You're a real sweetheart.

Answer 2

Kind of trapped in the workplace; too bad you couldn't have been a library customer instead you could have really had a blast with this POS jerk. Smacking, AKA hitting, would get you into very serious trouble, I'm afraid, however justified. Words can be even more devastating because they linger in the mind...I would have said "Look, little boy, you have two choices: to shut up and behave like a normal human being instead of a spoiled little brat or you can put down your book and leave and lose all library privileges. You are a waste of space." Then I would just stare him down and shake my head and say "UNBELIEVABLE" so everyone could hear.

Answer 3

First I think you handled the situation fine. However I think you would have also been fine to say I'm not checking these books out to you unless you can behave in a civilized manner. Then taken the books and given him back his card. If he continued to push I'd have him talk to the manager.

This kind of stuff happens at my library occasionally. The policy here is basically that while we are here to help folks we are not here to be abused and reserve to deny service based on conduct. (this would be categorized as disruptive in my opinion)

Here is the excerpt from our policy manual
Service may also be denied for other reasons, including, but not limited to bad address, abuse of services, failure to provide adequate identification, or disruptive behavior within the library. Specific services, i.e., interlibrary loan, internet access, etc. may be denied as outlined in other library policies.



Finally once I offered to call a young man's mother to see how she thought we should handle a situation. That changed his attitude very quickly.

Answer 4

I think you handled the best you could in that situation. I would have told him to leave and that he won't be able to check out a book for at least a week. I would have banned him from the library for a period of time as well. I would have then told his parents.

Answer 5

Umm you handled it poorly by apologizing over and over. You immediately gave into his ridicule, you reduced yourself to him.
How would I handle this is at the first snide remark I would have told him to carry his little butt and wait at the end of the line or leave.
I know you are a student aide but it does not mean you have to put up with that crap. Yet you did and that's why things got so ugly.

Assert yourself...and a little quicker next time.

Answer 6

Thats one of the reasons why I don't like kids, they are rude stupid, and don't know how to treat there elders.
Next time your in a situation like that do whats called passive/aggressive, go slower to make that person weight longer for you to get dune... So next time make the little bastards weight longer and take your time... I hate when people try to rush me when I'm doing something, I passive/aggressive every time someone tries to rush me...
Good Luck!!!


Captain, Chris W T
ATP- Lear 45, B747- A318 - A380
CFI

Answer 7

I work a public job also. I deal with irate customers all the time. I tend to make fools of them through intellectual means. I do it in mannerism in which they don't understand and laugh about it as they walk away. Or I reverse the role. They come up trying to make me look like an ***, in turn find themselves walking away looking the fool.

Answer 8

I don't know your age .or the kid's age . Regardless of age his comments were uncalled for. You handled it pretty well except the use of terms such as "shut up" let him know he was getting to you. I suspect he was doing this to show off.
Perhaps something like " Your comments are insulting and uncalled for. If you are unhappy
with the way in which I am helping you, I suggest you speak to the head librarian. Otherwise please be quite and allow me to do my job." (then smack him)

Answer 9

i would have told him to leave if he was acting like that. that just puts unneeded strain and frustration on your part, and probably made you slower as a result. don't worry about it. it's over now. but if something like that happens again, tell him to leave. you're in a powerful position if he needs the books. he'll have no choice but to be mindful the next time he comes in.

some people are just mean. it's sad but true. good luck!

Answer 10

Sounds like he was flirting with you. If he is cute, flirt back. If he isnt, then just politely say ONE time, "sorry, computer probs, going as fast as I can". After that, a cold, blank stare should be enough.

Answer 11

I would have put his book aside and told him that he could have it when he came back with his parents and learned better manners. Then I would have let my supervisor know what I did so that there was no surprise if the parents complained.