why is he so horrible to me???

Question

wenever my partner get mad he gets very horible to me!
I dont have a say in anything and if i try to have a say in somethin he gets mad with me and calls me everything under the sun. Im starting to get very depressed about this we have been together for 3+ years. I brought it up lastnight and he went bananas at me calling me a b*cth and allsorts then he went for a drive and when he came back he said he doesnt meen what he says to me BUT THAT DOESNT CHANGE THE FACT THAT HE IS HORRIBLE he bes so meen to me and a while later appoligises and says he didnt meen what he said BUT IF YOU ARE ALWAYS SAYING IT IT HURTS!!!

i wish he was nice to me and took my thoughts into consideration!!!!!
im so confused and am too lonely to leave!!!

I keep thinking surely there is a guy out there who would treat me better

Answer 1

There are alot of guys out there who will treat you better. Staying there is only bringing your self esteem down more and more, you may not even have any left. It beats you up. I was in a relationship like that before, and let me tell you it hurts, and the longer I stayed the more I believed the things he said to me, by the time I left I had no self esteem and no self worth. It took along time to find myself and love myself. If you really want to try and make it work, he has to get some help, otherwise you have to love yourself enough to leave. You can't love someone when you don't even love yourself. I don't think he loves himself much more either. Get out of it please. YOu will be glad you did later

Answer 2

Missy you are describing emotional abuse. Name calling is like taking an emotional swing and punching someone. You need to realize this is just wrong and not OK or healthy for you. It is possible that someday He will physically punch you.

This is not going to get better, apologies without change mean nothing. He knows he can use you as his verbal punching bag so that's how he deals with his anger.

When your pain is greater than your fear of change, break up and move on. Do you have children, Missy? If you do it is hurting them to be around this man. For everyone's sake, move on as soon as you can. There are women's shelters who can help you start over and learn how to prevent this from happening again.

Good luck, you do not deserve to be treated this way.

Answer 3

>>I keep thinking surely there is a guy out there who would treat me better

You are right!

What you are experiencing is called abuse. Verbal abuse. Your partner has serious issues he needs to address. No one should have to experience what you are going through. I strongly suggest you find someone you trust you can go to and get some help.

Based on your description of how your partner behaves, I don't recommend trying to do this by yourself, as it could get violent. It may be that your partner has other issues, but that doesn't change the fact that you need to find a way out of this relationship - if only until your partner realizes they need help.

Answer 4

yeah i went through the exact same thing...where we are different is that i left after 5 months...because even after a week of dating him he would call me names and put me down constantly...to the point where i would have really low self esteem and i would believe every single word he said about me...he would make me cry every single day..and it was just horrible...it scared me for life..i actually asked a question just like this on yahoo answers and everyone told me to dump him because i can do better..i eventually got up the courage to do it (and he made me feel like complete shit about it and threatened me i could never do better) but i felt SO MUCH better after dumping him...it was like a relief off my shoulders i felt like a million bucks...even though i have some trusting issues now...but any women in the world can do better than that..just remember that because its true. you CAN do Way better and you know what you should do. if you dont dump him now or soon your going to regret it for the rest of your life...and i can tell right now you cant picture yourself spending the rest of your life with a man like that.

PS. be careful too,because sooner or later he's going to start hitting you...and he'll say sorry and feel bad about it..but he'll continue to do it.

Answer 5

Of course there is a guy out there who will treat you better, but only if you start to treat yourself better, by leaving this verbally abusive jerk.
If you cannot or will not decide that you do deserve better than this and get out then you can never heal and end up with a better man

Answer 6

Honey, THERE IS!!
Leave him! Steal away in the night -- HES NOT RIGHT FOR YOU!!!! YOU CAN DO BETTER. YOU AREA BEAUTIFUL YOUNG WOMAN WHO IS NOT DESERVING OF A MAN LIKE THAT!

Answer 7

Break up for your own good. You deserve better. There are always more guys.

Answer 8

Because you allow it. There is Prince out there looking for you!