Why am I ugly?

Question

I know I'm not that ugly. But let's face it: I'm screwed. I studied so hard and worked so hard to improve the way I dress. I read the bloody Economist and am very well versed in the arts, literature, film, etc. I speak four languages. But I'm useless and horridly plain. I'm stuck depending on the kindness of others to love me. Every time I look at my face in my mirror, I feel like I dying and I just want to break the mirror and forget I exist. I know biology have cursed me forever, and don't you say that one day "the right man," will find you. Sure, but I'm not allowed to be choosy at all. Why bother? Why I am alive if I'm so undesirable to men? I don't care if they're not classically attractive, only thin, and from a good family and well-educated--as I am. I actually find Tom Hanks-type guys very attractive.
I live by a river, and sometimes I just feel like pulling an Ophelia and well you know...

http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/dd287/anagavalda109/MyPicture-2.jpg
http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/dd287/anagavalda109/MyPicture.jpg
No matter how much make-up I apply or hair styles I try, I will always not be good enough.

Oh and excuse the grammatical errors, I'm crying right now.

What does "not terrible" mean? Plain? If that's the case, it's a euphemism for screwed.

Answer 1

I'm a guy. I can help.

You aren't ugly. No such of a thing. I've seen your pictures and you are in fact a babe. You are also smart. Let me clue you in on something. Attractive means that something draws something toward it. Attractive women do in fact draw men in. But that's all it means. If attractive women put out, yeah, men will stick around. If not, they move on unless she is smart and or funny and or nice, etc.

Now I bet you anything guys approach you. I can't believe that they don't. Guys are shy, too, ya know. Sometimes they chat you up, hoping that somehow it will just 'come up' about dating or something. So here's what you do.

1.) Have confidence, even if you don't. (It's like 'be sincere, even if you DON'T mean it!! :>)!!!) Act like you do. Oh, be yourself as much as possible but at least act like, 'This is me. Love me or leave me alone.'

2.) Emphasize your strengths. Talk about politics, economy, travel, languages, or anything else you're interested in. One thing I can't resist is a smart woman. Especially a cute smart woman. I'm sorry to say, just as the Japanese do not eat with their mouths alone, I do not live on women's bodies alone, either. Intelligence is an aphrodisiac for a lot of guys.

3.) If you do in fact like a guy who is astonished that you can argue Marx, you don't have to take off your clothes, just act like you like him. I'll tell you now: It is AMAZING how beautiful a woman becomes when I know she likes me.

4.) Don't get married before the first date. You like him. Okay. He's just experiment # 1. Even have sex with him if it goes there, but remember: Guys have to do the work, you don't have to. You get to pick and choose. Shop around. BE picky.

And for god's sake, remember: guys are EASY to figure. Don't think about a guy like you would a girl friend. He wants you naked at some point (yes, even if he likes you and respects you), he DESPERATELY wants you to like him, and he isn't going to think of all the things you do so you have to train him to be romantic and so forth.

Answer 2

The definition of beauty has become impossible for at least 95% of women to achieve. It is really quite rediculous! So much pressure is put on looks that many people forget the many other wonderful things that make up human beings. True friends will recognize you for your inner beauty- it lasts a lifetime. Outer beauty fades with age. If you can't look more attractive, then act more attractive- there are always ways to get the right guy. Even for "beautiful" girls these things can take a long time! You seem like a beautiful person, and aren't as "plain" as you may think! Go knock 'em dead girl- I know you can!

Answer 3

I can't open your photos - problem at my end not yours - but I am sure you are not ugly. I think the problem lies in your obvious low self-esteem and depressed state. I suggest you need to see a therapist today. As for finding someone to love you, be yourself. Why would you want to improve the way you dress if it is not a reflection of who you really are? There is more to life than being desirable to the opposite sex. Get out and start enjoying life and I am sure that things will improve.

Answer 4

omg. you are f ucking gorgeous!! are you kidding? i am not just saying that honestly.

it sounds like you have some problems though, and you may want to see a counselor. you are a very pretty girl and unfortunately the media has gotten the best of you. you think you have to look a certain way and if you dont, you think you are ugly.

trust me i know exactly how you feel. i feel like that a lot sometimes. i am 5'9" so i always feel kinda awkward around guys and slouchy and i have bad acne at the moment which brings me down too and my hair is so poofy and frizzy and ihave braces! its pretty bad lol.

i know though that if you take care of yourself and you are CONFIDENT your inner beauty will shine throug.h. trust me, look at the guys who are/were popular at school. they werent always the cutest they were the ones who were outgoing and stuff.


trust me this is just a phase and you will eventually get over it but until then good luck on discovering your beauty because i already have!

Answer 5

You're only ugly, because YOU think you are. What the ears hear, the mind believes. I looked at your pictures, you're a very pretty girl. You actually look alot better than some of the people considered as famous. Keep your head up girl, I used to think the same thing when I was younger, but that was only because the guys I liked, didn't like me, so I convinced myself that it was because I was unattractive. Don't do that to yourself, it's not healthy. Best wishes!

Answer 6

I feel exactly the same. I often go into a state of rage where I cut my face with a sharp knife.

In all honesty, I do not think you are ugly. But I know myself that it doesn't help even when people tell you that.

I wish I could give you some advice to help you feel better - but I don't even know myself. Just know that you are not alone, and PLEASE don't kill yourself.

I'm here if you want to talk to me about this - believe me when I say I know exactly what you are going through.

Answer 7

Hey! I dont know how you view yourself as ugly. i dont think you are. not at all. its not because i feel sorry for you, i dont, i believe you look pretty just like the rest of the girls in the world.
if you wont mind, maybe i should give you some tips that makes any girl looks better, use foundation and concealer, getting a new haircut and using lipgloss. i can imagine you in those things and i can see you would look seriously AMAZING.

Answer 8

Oh my goodness, you are NOT ugly. Now, I know everyone tells you this, but you really aren't! You've got gorgeous hair I'd KILL for. Look, every woman thinks she is ugly, but you've got to trust others when they say you are pretty. You are! ^^
* By the way, there are PLENTY of men who are interested in the things you are, which makes you desirable to them. He'll..(I know you said don't say this..) find you or you'll find him. Just give it time, the moment will come. Just enjoy your life and go with the flow.

Answer 9

Oh, honey... you sound so sad! Why is it that you are so down on yourself? What happened? Did you get your heart broken? Did the object of your love reject you? Is it your parents? Something is not right in your life. Please do not be so down on yourself. As an intelligent woman, surely you must know that a down trodden attitude will only bring sadness back to you! and by the way, you are a beautiful girl!

Answer 10

I'm confused on why you feel so ugly and worthless. Your cute I think. I'm a guy by the way. If anything I'd feel stupid next to you. Given all that you know and all. However, I don't think your ugly or not worth chatting with. If I didn't chat you up. It'd be because I'm shy.