What are your feelings about ADD/ADHD? It was nothing I heard about years ago, but now I see it everywhere?

Question

I never thought it was a 'real' issue, always thought it was more of a behavior issue. Now my 8-year old son is having some signs of it and I don't know what to do-I really don't want him om medications. (I have teenage cousin's that have it and they hated taking the medicine because it always made them feel groggy). It's came on over the last month or two.

He fidgets his fingers, loses things, has problems completing his homework on time (he is a straight A student), his teacher has noticed a changes too - he seems very distracted and doesn't seem to be paying attention. He also does this at home, I can look him directly in the face, eye to eye and tell him something and he can't tell me what I said a few minutes later.

Answer 1

It's unusual for ADD/ADHD to simply "come on" in a couple of months and very unusual to begin at age 8. It sounds more like something has happened to him. These kinds of symptoms often begin after some kind of emotional trauma. I knew kids who acted like that after being molested. You need to find out what has happened in the last six months, anything from the loss of a pet to something much worse.

That said, as for my general feelings about it, I believe ADD/ADHD exists(my cousin clearly has it), but I also believe that it is terribly over-diagnosed. Many ADD/ADHD kids turn out to be misdiagnosed autistics.

Answer 2

It is definitely a real issue, however there are a lot of kids on meds that don't need them. I work with these type of kids every day and I don't think your son needs medication. I'm wondering if he could be bored. Being a straight A student, maybe the work isn't challenging enough. Sometimes kids that seem distracted are found to need glasses. Have you had his eyes checked lately? Take a close look at his diet, too many packaged foods and not enough whole grains and fruit and vegetables can affect kids too. Mention it to his doctor and make sure they check every angle, don't let them tell you it is ADD without ruling out other things first.

Answer 3

I have ADHD and I was not medicated until I was 18. I was in Gifted/Honors/AP throughout my entire career in school and the disability never really affected my grades. I was a straight A student, however I did not pay attention in class at all. Yes, the medication has helped significantly. I think when and if to be medicated is a decision that will differ from patient to patient and should be discussed in depth with your physician. If you're not satisfied with the solutions your son's physician has to offer, go for a second opinion. Also, remember that once you start medicating, it's not permanent.

Answer 4

I do think ADD and ADHD are real but WAY to over diagnosed. I have also heard if they have it-the parents know "something" from a very early age. My 5 yr old son has been having some "problems" and that's the first thing they asked about when I took him to the Dr! I was appalled! I have been working with some behavior specialist at our local Partnership for children. I only knew about this free resource because my sister goes to church with a lady who works there. you could look up Partnership for children in your phone book (county by county here)
They have been absolutely wonderful and once I really started listening to my son I just realized he has been acting out for attention, a little more independence and I think being a little jealous of his sister and not knowing how to express his emotions. I can see a change in him in a matter of a couple of weeks after following advice. Its not "perfect" but much better. They think things like this are to blame for many kids being wrongly diagnosed. somethings bothering them.
Other people think too much TV, the crap that's in our food nowadays (the school system feeds them garbage!) and food allergies are partly to blame.
I would also look into therapy and try EVERYTHING before giving medication. Do a search on "treating ADD without medication" There are Dr's who treat ADD and ADHD WITHOUT drugs. and some treat with therapy and medication if you choose.
I wish the best of luck. I know how heartbreaking it is to face this with your precious child.

Answer 5

As a parent, having to deal with ADD/ADHD in your everyday life is a struggle.

Your child has no control over his/her actions in that particular moment and as such feels helpless. As a parent you also feel helpless as you have to let some of it run it's course before even approaching your child to calm them down.

The biggest problem is other people who butt their noses trying to tell you what's best for your child and how to bring them up when they knwo nothing of your problems.

Your son sounds quite like mine and my son has Aspergers which is on the autistic spectrum. He is very intelligent and can retain copious amounts of information. However if you talk to him about something he will have forgotten the conversation five minutes later, go back to him a hour later and then he remembers. It's almost a short term memory loss. I am like you though I do not want him on medication.

The chances are your son has retained everything you've told him but doesn't know what to do with the information so locks it away in the back of his brain for later.

Please read a book called

Freaks, Geeks and Aspergers Syndrome by Luke Jackson

Luke is 13 years old and suffers from Aspergers. He has other siblings ALL of whom are on the autistic spectrum from low to high end.

Give it a read and see if your recognise your son in the pages. I was like 'Oh my God son that's you' and that was in the first chapter.

A good website for trying to promote positive behaviour is chartjungle.com it's really great for behaviour chart, reward tokens and the like.

Try making your son up a visual time table with pictures of what he has to do and when he has to do it. If he has something tangible to look at he will feel more certain of what he is doing. Ask his school to do the same.

Remember there is no such thing as a perfect parent or perfect child. You are doing your best and as long as your son grows up knowing he is loved, you're doing great. Chin Up.

Good Luck

Answer 6

I have ADD, as well as my son. It's crummy, crummy, and the meds are not making me happy (they just raised the dose).

My son wouldn't have gotten through school without ritalin, dexadrine or adderall. He's an A-B student who can't organize and can't remember to turn his papers in. He's failing two classes (he's 17).

It's a real issue. But I wouldn't put him on meds at the drop of a hat. I'd have a pediatric psychologist give him some tests and find out if there's a certain area that your son is having more trouble with. Then you'll be able to make knowledgable decisions from that point.

TX Mom

Answer 7

I have ADD. Your son is definitely exhibiting symptoms, but it might be too late to make a diagnosis. I think you need to have exhibited those symptoms before five to seven years.
I definitely have those kinds of problems and can totally relate to your son. I am on medication. What kind of medication did your cousins take? I am 15. I used to be on Adderal (amphetamine oral tablets, 30 mg), but I switched to Daytrana (methylphenidate patch, 30 mg). It doesn't make me groggy, but I do have annoying side effects such as slight insomnia and loss of appetite.
Both my brothers have ADD (7 and 12 years) and are taking the same medicine I am. They are doing fine in school. As for me, I am a (almost) straight A student in the IB Program, weighted GPA is 4.416 (not to brag). Medicine has really helped me to be fully successful.
ADD is a mental disorder, and it is very common. I think statistics are approx. 1 in every 16 kids have it (I could be wrong though).
If you REALLY don't want him on medication, I think there is special therapy treatment.
Hope I helped (and sorry this is so long!!)

Answer 8

My seven year old daughter was diagnosed with ADHD about 6 months ago. She has been put on medication and it is helping a great deal. It all depends on the severity of the ADHD to what medication to be put on. Not all meds will make them groggy. Talk to a Doc and see what they suggest.
Patience is the main key though.. Believe me I know

Good luck

Answer 9

I was diagnosed with ADD in my junior year of high school. I was always a good student so my parents never picked up on it. I got tested, but due to my happy nature and ability to still do well in school it was decided that I did not have to go on medication...however the doctor gave me some strategies on how to stay focused without medication...unfortunately I've kind of forgotten them BUT I do remember on good one. Your son and his teacher(s) can come up with a code word that the teacher will say when they notice him not paying attention, that way he will know that he wasn't paying attention and can redirect his attention towards the teacher. It was a big help for me.

Answer 10

I have Add and out of my 7 children 3 have Add and one has ADHD.
The first thing you should know is that it is hereditary. Not everyone has it..I am a grown adult and was diagnosed with it 7 years ago. I grew up with it - and as I got older and began going to college (in my 30's) I could clearly see it myself..
I have never been on medication for it. I refuse to take the medication for it. two out of my four children that have it have been on medication for it,and are no longer on it (I took them off it)..
It has to do with your attention span and your abillity to concentrate and stay on task..
If you are an adult with it - you can train yourself to focus and stay on task. A chiild how ever is a bit different ,but through counceling and the parents working closely with the child, you can also train the child.you can teach your child self awareness , and through this they can learn to identify the problems of ADD.Once a child can do this, they can learn with help from an adult to solve the situation and find solutions that work, so that they can get through the things (like schoolwork and chores that need to be done)
This doesnt happen overnight. I have worked with my 8 yr old for about 3 years now and he now knows self awareness and solutions to get around the difficulties that ADD puts into his life.
It takes a lot of help and encouragment from an adult,and once we came up with a solution to him not being able to sit and do homework - whe ever it is home work time,and I see him getting restless, I remind him of the solution,and he is able to complete things.