Mad at God!! Is it ok? How do I fix this?

Question

My beloved Aunt died this past weekend. She has been in the hospital for about 3 days and hadn't woken up after passing out at home. They say she didn't get oxygen to her brain for too long. There were no brain waves when they did the CAT scan. She has had diabetes for a long time and did not start trying to take care of it and herself till it was too late...she has been on dialysis for awhile. Some may say she is outta pain but she has said she didn't want to die and to try to bring her back if the need should arise. We had to unplug her from life support. I sat there after they unplugged everything and prayed and begged God the whole time as she fought to survive. But she passed away about 20 minutes later. Why would he take her from us? She was like an angel on Earth,. I swear. She was one of the kindest people you'd ever meet. Always happy and giggly. She was so great and it is not fair that he took her!!! She was 59...and just so damn nice, it's not fair!! I'm just so mad at Him.

today on the way to the cemetery after the service I felt like now is not the time to be pushing him away I need him more than ever right now. she was always praying for everyone else and would not want to think she was the cause of me straying from him she would be happy to know i became closer to him with her help.

to the atheists: thank you for your compassion though some of you didn't exactly answer the question...it is weird how most of yall sound like nice people but you don't believe in God? I know this sounds ignorant but it is weird to me. I will not down yall or your opinions though. Again thanks.

Answer 1

When my father passed away in April of this year, I had to make the same decision. I watched him for a week lying there waiting to die. Death is not fair to those that are living, we suffer a great loss.

There is no where in the Bible that says that God promised us that this life would be without pain and suffering. What his promise is, is that if you will let him he will be there for you to help you through it. I don't mean physically either. It may be in the form of someone who comes to you to offer council, or simply a scripture that you come across.

I want to believe that when my father died his journey, or work, or whatever you want to call it, here was done. It was time for him to move into eternity.

I was also very angry with God. It was not fair. I then lost my uncle only 4 months later. I could not see why God was doing this to my family. I just pressed harder. I prayed harder. I searched his word. I let everyone know how I felt and they prayed for me as well.

Sorry this is so long. E-mail me if you want and I will discuss this further.

Answer 2

You have every right to be angry, and you probably won't stop being angry for a long time. The only way you will be able to change this is to understand and accept your loss, which is not easy. No one should expect you to be over this soon.

There is nothing that you can do to bring her back or change the past. It may help to remember that even though she asked to be revived, if her CAT scan didn't show brain activity, her soul--the things that made her the bright, warm person she was--died before the machines were keeping her alive. What would have changed if you would have kept the machine plugged in?

It is not possible to know why some people lose loved ones or why God seems to treat us unfairly, but you have to have faith that there is a reason for your loss that you may never figure out. What you -can- do is honor her memory by living your life to the fullest and keeping her alive in spirit.

I am so sorry for your loss and I wish you and your family comfort in dealing with this.

Answer 3

I know you're upset and it doesn't seem to make sense right now. I really am sorry for your loss; I know it's hard. I've lost people close to me too, some of them well before (what I thought was) their time.

However, God didn't take her from you. Our bodies, though they are pretty incredible machines, are also not made to last through a whole lot. Your aunt was very sick, and you mentioned that she didn't take care of herself till it was too late. I'm not trying to say that it was all her fault or anything - that's a cruel and meaningless thing to say - but it did have something, physically, to do with it. Her body just plain wasn't strong enough to keep going.

Right now, none of this is going to make sense. I understand that, and so does God. Trust me, he can handle your anger. He can handle your hurt, your frustration, your sadness, and even your doubt. He didn't stop loving your aunt, and he won't stop loving you.

There will come a time, when the main part of the hurt passes (it does pass, eventually), when you will see this a little more logically. Don't worry about doing that now; just let yourself grieve. But logically, there's really nothing the doctors could have done to bring her back. If her brain scan was flat, there's no way her body could ever live on her own again. The signals necessary for her organs to work were no longer there. They could keep her on life support indefinitely, but it wouldn't have brought her back to you. Her body would be there, but she wouldn't.

When you get ready to deal with things (it will take a while, and that's ok), you will hopefully see what a blessing God gave you in the years you had with your aunt. It sounds like she was a really incredible person, full of life and joy, and that's probably how she'd like you to remember her. She would want to know that she not only touched your life while she was with you, but in the years to come. She wouldn't want you to live a life outside of that joy; from what you've said, she would want you to grieve, and when you're done, to allow God to heal that grief and give you back the joy that she felt was so important.

It is hard. It's ok for it to be hard. God isn't going to walk away from you, no matter how mad you get. And when you're ready to understand it, he'll help you do that.

Answer 4

Wow..... there are so many people here who think God doesn't exist! He does, i have proof, but that's a different story... your aunt died, not because of God, but because she didn't take care of herself until it was too late. Also, once a brain has ceased to function, the essence of your aunt is no longer present. all that is left is her body -- that's what happens when you die -- your soul passes into another level where there truly IS no pain. just an utterly beautiful tranquility and peace. i know this, because I've been there twice. both times i WAS dead. no heartbeat, blood pressure, da nada. but i saw no hokey white light with relatives either... i believe that is a common misconception shared by many people. i did NOT want to come back either time -- life is freaking hard -- but i was told i must go back, that now was not my time.
the first time, i was 18, and had mouth-to-mouth. i had turned blue, my lips were ashen... the second time, was about 6 years ago, and i was in the ocean. i was coming in, was in about a foot of water, had a seizure, and BAM!
So yes -- God does exist, i won't go into the personal aspects of it, but yes, He does exist. and if you met me, you would know i am skeptical about most things, even jaded with Life. If we ever meet face to face, I'll tell you the whole story. dying is nothing to be afraid of. Heaven also exists -- i have been there as well, and it's another long story.
So please take what i say to heart... your aunt is in a MUCH better place, and is at total peace. Take comfort from that.

Answer 5

Everyone gets mad at God at one time or another. But when he created life he never intended for man to die. It was sin entering into the plan long ago that caused us to have to die (please get a Bible and find out how). But in His mercy, God made a way for us to have life AFTER we die.... the Bible will tell you about that too. Suffering grieves God, but we're all born into a sinful existence and that's why the world is in the shape it's in. Please explore the Bible and see what a loving God we REALLY have... only HE can make good come out of bad and wipe away every tear. If there is a Bible-believing church in your town, i encourage you to go there and speak with a Pastor about this. There is also a book you can get at the bookstore entitled, "Why bad things happen to good people."
Please don't listen to people who say there is no God... just look around you...where did it all come from? He made the stars, the galaxies, the sun and the moon... and He created us. And beleive me when I say he is concerned with the pain and anger you now feel. Do as I have suggested...you won't regret it.

Answer 6

Don't be mad at GOD.it is no his fault your aunt died.you blame Almighty God because you think that he is the real ruler of this world.The Bible states: “The whole world is lying in the power of the wicked one.” (1 John 5:19) When you think about it, does that not make sense? This world reflects the personality of the invisible spirit creature who is “misleading the entire inhabited earth.” (Revelation 12:9) Satan is hateful, deceptive, and cruel. So the world, under his influence, is full of hatred, deceit, and cruelty. That is one reason why there is so much suffering.God hates wickedness and the suffering it causes far more than any human does.(1 Peter 5:7)The pain, the grief, and the feelings of helplessness can seem unbearable from losing a loved one.believe me,I lost my grandma on my mom's side and my grandfather on my dad's side in the same year.I loved them both alot.even though i've know my grandma my whole entire life,and I only met my grandfather once.I loved them alot.God’s purpose is that the whole earth be made into a paradise. So the dead will not be raised to life in a world filled with war, crime, and sickness. They will have an opportunity to live forever on this earth in peaceful and happy conditions.Dead loved ones will be restored to life with the prospect of never dying. All those sleeping in death who are in God’s memory will be brought back to life. In fact, “there is going to be a resurrection of both the righteous and the unrighteous.(Acts 24:15)So don't give up hope and don't blame God.He promises us that he will be resurrect the dead.(John 5:28)

Answer 7

I understand how you feel. I just lost 2 friends this month. It is really hard when someone we love passes away.

You have my deepest sympathy.

What you are feeling is grief, and anger is part of this.....if there were no brain waves, she was dead long before they disconnected her. So you were praying for her,and she was already gone. Understand that death is part of this life, and all life has to pass onto the next one. We need to grieve and then move on. If she was a believer, then she is in the arms of God. You will feel anger for awhile...it is part of losing someone. Be glad for the good times you had, and the nice memories. Take strength from these memories and use them to bless others.

Answer 8

Then tell Him so. Throw your anger at His feet and express your pain. God doesn't condemn people for being angry with Him, as is depicted at several points in the Bible. It's not healthy to bottle up one's emotions and try to hide them, especially when it comes to God. Don't forsake Him, though. I'm not going to preach at you about Hell or anything like that, not just because it would disrespectful of me to say such things while you are in mourning, but because I don't believe in a literal, eternal Hell as many do. Despite that, however, abandoning God will not make you happier. It will not ease your pain. Most importantly, it will not bring back your aunt.

Consider, though: she lived to be almost 60 years old. There was a time when people rarely lived past 40. It is perfectly alright to be sad and angry for a time, but in the long run, will it not honor her (and God, for that matter) better if you are grateful for the time she DID have on Earth? Is your life not brighter for having known her? Death is inevitable, but having family members who love you is not. Rejoice that you had the latter.

Answer 9

I guess, if you're Christian, your religion says that if you accept Jesus Christ, you will be reunited with her in heaven (as long as she believed, too). But, if you're an atheist, like me, then you believe that she just no longer exists. Her biological functions have stopped and she is not alive anymore. A very natural part of the life cycle. Either way, she is no longer in pain. Try and remember the best memories that you had with her, because it sounds like she was a good and meaningful person to you.

Answer 10

I am really sorry to hear about your aunt. Honey all things happen for a reason and the hard part is that we may never know what that reason is. God took my husband at the age of 36 and left me all alone at the age of 34. You want to talk about being mad at God......I cursed him with every breath for months but you know what....when every one else went home after the funeral the only person that stayed with me was God....he understands your grieve and anger, he's been there. Remember this......what he brings you to he will help you through.