we have been together for 2 years, and he doesnt work on things that i feel will help us grow as a couple. I have tried before but he got made and started throwing and breaking things in the apartment. I really dont want to hurt him, but I dont feel like our relationship is going anywhere. I just dont want to feel like a horrible person for hurting him when I leave.
Anyone have words of wisdom?
2007-11-28 07:31:24 · 25 answers · asked by Amanda 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Just be honest with him, explain your reasons and go.
2007-11-28 07:50:11 · answer #1 · answered by Mover50 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that the best thing that you can do if this is the real reason is to just be honest and tell him exactly what you are telling us although, from the statements it doesn't seem like he will take it too well but first and foremost you have to be true to yourself and put your happiness first and unfortunately alot of times that results in hurting someone else. So, if you want to guilt-free with your decision just be honest.
2007-11-28 07:38:56 · answer #2 · answered by dladiesgentleman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can't avoid feelings getting hurt during a break up. so just do your best to let him down. since he does throw a tantrum and appears to be violent, it's in your best interest to have the talk in public. in the long run, it's best for the both of you to be apart than together. any guy would be lucky to have you based on what you said. good luck.
2007-11-28 07:39:50 · answer #3 · answered by a 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to treat this situation bery carefully. I just wanting to let you know that you're doing the right thing by not prolonging it any longer. You just have to be strong and pack up your stuff when he isn't home...when he shows up...he will get the hint. Then sit him down and tell him that things just aren't working out. Explain to him that you love him but you just can't live like that any more. Be string...and I hate to tell you but any time you break up with someone they get hurt...but the good thing is that they will eventually get over and heal and move on....just like you will. Good Luck Sweetie...
2007-11-28 07:37:48 · answer #4 · answered by carqueen66 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I told the guy i was with for about 3 years that i just wasn't in love with him anymore. Luckily he felt the same way and we went from there. However, I got married to a guy who was abusive, when i would tell him i was leaving he would get mad and drag me out of the house by me leg, throw things at me, pin me down, you name it he did it. I just got up one day, took him to work (he didn't have a license) and left a note on the tv explaining that i couldn't tell him to his face b/c of his temper. Well, of course, he got mad. But he couldn't hurt me. That was my main focus. He got over it finally. I know it sounds immature and insensitive, but I thought it over for about a month before I actually did it. I was also advised by his mother, my family, and my attorney to do it this way!
2007-11-28 07:41:19 · answer #5 · answered by ericapaige 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he throws things when he doesn't get his way, I'd be more worried about him hurting you. You've given him opportunities to improve, and he's decided not to take them. That was his choice, and he has to deal with the consequences now. All you can do is be strong and stick to what you know's best for you.
2007-11-28 07:35:57 · answer #6 · answered by MM 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to be honest. A break up i snever easy.. You are just going to have to tell him. There is no easy way but he is going to have to except that you guys are not meant to be. Just be Honest and do it in person... not over the phone or through a text message... Good Luck
2007-11-28 07:34:19 · answer #7 · answered by Broken Blue Eyes 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no way(unfortunately)that you won't have feelings of guilt,but if you know that this has to end you have to end it as soon as possible.He'll be o.k in time.We all go through it at one point or another.Hell grow on his own eventually and he'll be a better person because of it.Take comfort in that
2007-11-28 07:39:24 · answer #8 · answered by ... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It hurts a LOT more if you leave and don't explain why, or leave without giving him closure.
You should go into it KNOWING you are doing what is best, and don't give an inch, but be nice, too.
If your mind is made up, make sure that is clear.
2007-11-28 07:37:06 · answer #9 · answered by haveyoueversleptoutside 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you have grown a part. the oldest but true excuse. Plus his temper sounds awful and he sounds unreasonable. It sounds like he will act inappropriately no matter what is said. So try to keep it short with less details so it will be a clean break.
2007-11-28 07:37:20 · answer #10 · answered by z 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I know that you're worried about hurting him, but this decision is for you, not him. Sure he will be hurt, but you need to do what you need to do. I was in the same situation with my ex, he kept begging me to come back, crying, freaking out, but I just had to ignore it, because I knew it was best for me.
2007-11-28 07:34:34 · answer #11 · answered by kimberly_frye06 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋