And I am so scared! I love him and can't picture life without him in it and he feels the same but I am scared that if we do get married we will start fighting and end up hating each other and end up getting devorced. I don't want that to happen.
When we do get angry with eachother we usually give eachother some time to pout then talk about it like reasonable adults so my brian knows that we shouldn't have to many issues but my heart gets scared about all the "what ifs" that could happen. How do you handle this? I want to be with him the rest of my life but I am just terrified!
We have been dating over 2 years and have actually lived together for most of those 2 years and we honstely haven't had any major issues aside from our grouchy periods that we get through just fine. We are both very stable, loving, understanding and best of friends so why am I so terrified?
Also I am worried about the cost of it! It seems so exspencive! I don't know if we have the funds for this.
2007-11-28 06:19:37 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Why don't you get married in Cuba?
Oh, right, you Americans aren't allowed.
Don't you think it's time to call off the embargo, lady?
Sorry, uncalled for.
2007-11-28 06:48:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well you shouldn't be scared. You have to be strong to be married so you can deal with any issues that come at you so you don't end up divorced.
Weddings can be expensive. Mine started off just being at the house I grew up in with close freinds and is now at a church with over 100 people and we just hit $3000. But remember, you don't have to have a big wedding. You can just go to the courthouse or plan a cute weekend trip with some freinds at a nearby wedding stop - like Gatlinburg? They can even bring weddings to your cabin. How easy!
Anyways, hold your head up high. Who knows, I have an aunt and uncle that have been together for over 15 years and still aren't legally married.
2007-11-28 07:20:49 · answer #2 · answered by J90 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I always say if you have doubts it's prob. for a good reason! I had absolutely no doubts when I got married this summer, we had been together for 6 1/2 years and I had known since the 1st year that I would marry him someday! Maybe you should have a really long engagement and let it all sink in, and use that time to save money! Make sure it's right before you do it!
2007-11-28 06:30:51 · answer #3 · answered by jcturtle27 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I had to guess I would say that you have probably seen some unhappy married couples and fear that you will turn into them. What you have to remember is that you are in control of you and you guys do not have to let it get that way. You have to work every day to make a marriage happy but it can be that way. It sounds like you guys have been handling problems well so if you continue to do that, you should be okay. As far as the expense, it doesn't have to be expensive, it can be as extravagant or as intimate as you want. Best wishes.
2007-11-28 06:29:36 · answer #4 · answered by Deanrijo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are always going to be doubts. It sounds like you think this can work. The most important thing in a relationship is that you are able to be honest with each other.
As far as the wedding, you do not have to have the blow out of the century. Do what you can with what you have. Start saving now and only spend within your means. Best of luck!
2007-11-28 08:27:47 · answer #5 · answered by vaya 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well two years is a long time so your doing well to get through them. If you get engaged and have a long engagement that gives you a few years to save. I think your right to feeling how you feel as i felt the same. But it all works out fine in the end as you love each over and can get through anything thrown at you.
2007-11-28 06:27:50 · answer #6 · answered by Katie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will change guaranteed! The question is can you both deal with change and work through things.
My wife and I have been married for 16 years and life has thrown more curves at us then any marriage should have to handle. But we stuck it out and had several rough years but things have improved much. But only through a lot of effort on both our parts.
Marriage is a 2 player sport and you need both players to win!
2007-11-28 06:32:53 · answer #7 · answered by FREDOAK3 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Everybody gets cold feet. If you're worried about cost, elope and have a small reception- picnic style or something. Don't think about hating eachother and divorcing- think about how happy you will be marrying your best friend. Good Luck!
2007-11-28 07:21:26 · answer #8 · answered by Mars1111 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? Just curious. Have you witnessed a divorce of your parents? Sometimes, that causes feelings of "what if it doesnt work out". But it sounds like you are on solid ground, so just give it time and dont push yourself.
Weddings do not have to be expensive. They can be small, informal affairs.
2007-11-28 06:28:38 · answer #9 · answered by fizzy stuff 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know exactly how you feel.. i am having doubts about getting married myself. dont get me wrong, i love my h2b very much and would happily lay down my life for him. but, i am scared there will be a huge change as soon as we get hitched. i am scared that little piece of paper will destroy my very happy relationship.
i think the best thing for the pair of us to do, is just bite the bullet and jump straight in there!!
as for costs, you really dont need to spend a lot- we are spending £1300 in total...
2007-11-28 06:25:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its normal to freak about getting married.like you said you don't want to get divorced so tell him straight up that u don't believe in divorces and that he can never geet one no matter what happens.of course under certain circumstances one will suffice.yes marriage is pretty much a piece of paper announcing to the world you are now taken permanently.lol weddings are expensive and need to be saved up for properly.hope this helps.
2007-11-28 06:31:52 · answer #11 · answered by feeling it 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋