handwriting.....!!!!!!!!!!errrrr!!!!!!help!!!!!?

Question

okay, my oldest is six, and her handwriting is horrible, (for a six year old) and at first we were just letting it go thinking that she would eventually get better (advice from teacher), but that wasn't working, so now we resulted in making her do her homework over if it was messy (advice from teacher) which of course results in alot of arguing and tears, (on both parts), so, progress reports came and of course she had a (needs improvement) next to the line for handwriting, so I showed this to her and she said she was sorry, then proceeded to do her homework in messy handwriting, so I proceeded to crumple it up and throw it out...., long story short...has anyone else had this problem? and what did you do about it? when did it finally click in? I'm running out of options, and my fuse is running very very short at homework time, I think there is a feeling of stress before we even sit down to do it, which of course creates a problem in itself..any advice?

...wanted to add, some things real quick.
she is in the gifted program at school
has been in school since age 4...and at that age they began teaching them writing and spelling and reading right away, she reads at a 3rd grade level. so she already knows how to spell, and what the letters look like, etc, and when she takes her time and "feels" like doing a good job...she does, but almost always..she is just trying to rush through it to go and play, which I totally understand, after all she's six, and when given the choice between homework and play, of course play wins out, we've even tried to let her have some down time when she first comes home, but thats not working either., so it really has nothing to do with her just learning to write, she's been writing for close to three years now.

Answer 1

Find someone in your area who does the "Handwriting Without Tears Program" It really works, and it's fun. Tell her teacher to be patient and help ypou find the resources you need.

Answer 2

My son has the same problem. He is 8 and in the third grade. He read at the 7th-8th grade level and is a straight-A student.

He has bad handwriting because he is ambidextrous. A lot of bright people are. It has something to do with the way both sides of their brain develop without favoring one side or the other.

Consequently, until Kindergarten, he would sometimes use his left hand, sometimes his right. So neither hand got enough practice and he was way behind the other kids. The school finally told him to pick a hand to write with and use the other hand for other stuff. They suggested he pick his left hand because he was a bit better with the left. So he picked his RIGHT (because he doesn't like being told he can't do something -- has to prove you wrong).

Unfortunately, he elected to write right, but draw and color left. Drawing and coloring is an important part of developing handwriting skills. So he was -- and is -- still behind.

We do give him extra practice. We do make him write out his homework over again if it's messy, but we don't do anything as dramatic as crumpling up the paper and throwing it away. Kids respond with as much drama as you do, remember.

We gave him a hard-back journal to encourage more handwriting. We bought him binders so he could make his own books. We have him write one letter a week to a friend who moved away or a grandparent or other relative (every Saturday). We praise him when he writes neatly and have stressed good handwriting as an important way to help people understand what you are trying to say.

You need to de-stress about this so your kid de-stresses about it. Just be matter-of-fact. If you tell her that her handwriting lag is because she's smart and her brain is busy soaking up all sorts of information so that it doesn't have time to work at the handwriting thing, that makes it into a positive. But then tell her, she needs to MAKE her brain focus on it because her handwriting prevents other people from knowing how smart she really is.

Answer 3

Honestly, it is handwriting for goodness sakes. I would really ease up and let this one go. She is 6 years old and you are crumpling up her homework? That is really rude behavior on your part. No wonder she is in tears. I come from a family of teachers and I am here to tell you she is using this to control your relationship. The proof is that you say she can write neatly. She may be stressed and this is how she manifests the stress. She feels like it is the one area of her life she can control, so she does.

Is it legible? If so, back off. I got straight A's on every report card in elementary school except for handwriting. I got U's every time (unsatisfactory). I turned out to be an honor student in high school and college. No one ever mentioned it except for the teachers in elementary school.

If that is all you have to worry about...you are doing pretty well. Celebrate what she CAN do.

Answer 4

Handwriting has nothing to do with reading ability or intelligence. It is a matter of small motor and perceptual development. My son entered First Grade reading on a Fourth Grade level, and had terrible handwriting. He reversed letters, his spacing was all wrong, and he couldn't seem to get it. The only times he came close was when all he had to do was copy, not think about his writing. We eventually had him evaluated. Turns out he was dysgraphic-the handwriting version of dyslexia. What you are doing now is obviously not working and may well make things worse. If you do not want to go through the school for an evaluation find an Occupational Therapist who specializes in working with kids with learning disabilities. Also remember that kids develop skills at different rates. Maybe the time spent on learning academics in preschool meant she didn't get enough practice with things like play dough, crayons and Lego's. Maybe she just has poor motor skills. Deal with this now and get off the poor kid's back until you find out exactly what is going on. By the way, my son got help and has a college degree and a well paying job.

Answer 5

I am going through the same thing. I even feel like I want to hurt my child. It's not so much the handwriting but him not wanting to do it, not listening. As far as the handwriting goes do you know that it can be better. Mine has terrible writing b/c he just wants to get it done quicker. If he slows down the handwriting is fine. He had a lot of problems with his fine motor skills and had to go to occupational therapy . They use to work on handwriting with him. It could be that she is having problems that need to be corrected by prof. help. Does she hold the pencil correctly. Is it that she is writing the letters to big , not properly forming the letters. If this is the case then sit her down again with her abc's and make her practice writing them everyday. Try to take a chill pill. It will get better I promise. Go into it with a clear head telling yourself it will be better this time. Only you know if she is truly trying. If she is trying and not going to fast then don't worry about the teacher. Have a sit down with her , let her know she is doing her best and it will get better the more she practices.

I don't know where Louie kids go to school but mine is in 1st grade and they are making him write sentences. He is in public school, cousins his age are stay at home and they are writing in cursive already.

Well nevermind my answer LOL. You have to sit with her and have an eraser in hand. Everytime it doesn't look correct erase it. Don't let her get to the end of the homework and through it away. Sit right next to her. Keep reminding her constantly. It has to be neat. Maybe a rewards system will work. If she does it right the 1st time then she will get something extra special at the end of the week if you don't have to stay on her all week.

Answer 6

EDIT: WELL first of all BILINDA, WHERE IM FROM there is a difference between handwriting and printing, my child is printing sentences, they dont teach handwriting (cursive if thats the word you use) untill grade 2.
ok then, that is some more information .. if she knows all, then the issue is you giving her the choice of homework or play. my daughter has homework time after supper for about an hour. We practice her printing and reading etc. she has an issue with mucking around sometimes and just wanted to get it over with, but i tell her if she keeps doing that, it will take longer cause i know she can do the work neater than she is doing.... Getting hard on them isnt the way to go, ive tried and it leaves her crying and upset, and not wanting to to the work at all...Positve is good, and my daughter like it when i play the kid and she is the teacher, she will tell me to sound words out or spell them and i mess it up on purpose and she has to correct me.... i think you can do this will your daughter too, make it fun for her, play games with it, use a reward program if you need too. Have a set time aside everyday when its homework time, and dont let her con you into "later, or in a minute". Do writing games, etc, she will improve and the more you give her positive comments, the more she will enjoy doing the good work.

Answer 7

My mom has the BEST handwriting, so she would write out the alphabet, my spelling words and some other things and I would have to write them over again, trying my best to copy what she wrote. I had terrible handwriting, but the teachers weren't concerned until the third grade. Right now, she should be concentrating on reading and writing, not the "proper" writing skills.

Write stuff for her to trace, then have her do it herself and do it after homework everyday. Don't crumple her homework, that will just fluster the both of you.

Answer 8

Something that worked for my daughter was getting her a chalkboard and a dry erase board and letting her play "teacher". Most little girls like playing teacher or the person in charge. Remind her how important it is for her pretend students to understand what she writes on the board. It's helpful if the board has the alphabet already printed across the top. Be the "student" sometimes and let her teach you. She'll see it as a game but in reality, everything she does will help her practice her penmanship skills. Also those writing tablets with the dotted lines between the 2 bold lines help somewhat. It's VERY, VERY frustrating but you have to keep at it with her. One other cheap thing that sometimes helps a bit are those grippy foam things you put on the pencil where she holds it. It makes it more comfortable for small hands. Good luck!

Answer 9

My son is very delayed with his fine motor skills. He is in 2nd grade and his writing is not as good as the other kids. He gets additonal help at school, and they do the "Handwriting without Tears". I sit with him every nite to help with his homework, and I remind him to do his best. Some days is better than others, but if I were to throw away his homework and make him start over, he would probably have a melt down. It is challenging for him to do writing and so I try to make it as positive as I can. As long as his words are legible, I let it be.
You should try to remember that while her writing is messy to you, it's probably her best work right now. Encourage her and reward her for trying her best.

Answer 10

My son and I have been working on this. I took him shopping and let him pick out a bunch of school related items that he thought would help him. He picked out pencils, post-it notes, notebooks, a clipboard and some other items.
He has a homework corner where everything is stored, it's just for him.
Then, I made him some worksheets that have the alphabet typed on the top line and then notebook lines under that have the dotted lines in the middle so that he can practice.
It has really made a difference.

Answer 11

I have horrible handwriting and it's related to Asperger Syndrome in my case. I still remember getting into trouble during all of my years of school because of my handwriting, I would try and try and nothing helped. I practiced and practiced because my mom and my younger sister both had (have) beautiful handwriting and mine is still barely legible, but it didn't work. I used to feel terrible about my handwriting and still don't write if I can avoid it (I type if I have to write anything). If practice and tutoring don't help it may be worth looking into the possibility of a developmental disorder.