My Nan has been in an old people's home for the last 12 months and refuses to get out and visit us. We see her every week but it is coming up for christmas and we want her out on christmas day. She says that she has a bad stomach but it's just in her head. We've tried being nice, blackmail, bribery, and trickery but nothing will get her out.
What can I do?
2007-11-27 20:47:00 · 8 answers · asked by thomas j 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Respect her wishes.
.
2007-11-27 21:10:59 · answer #1 · answered by YY4Me 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's true! Sometimes older people tend to be moody about their sorroundings because they think that they are a burden to other people or simply because they are lonely in life. Their health tends to fail and their minds tend to shift their focus and their understanding of their environment. And through it all, it is hard to change their minds about things. Why not ask her what's wrong? Just keep on with her and understand her situation as an old woman. Maybe help her feel that she is very special and she is a part of a family. Just do what real families do: encourage each other and help each other in time of need. This Christmas, instead of going out, why not cheer her up by having the party at her place and bring her presents (make sure that's what she really likes...just being there makes a big difference) and have fun! Make her relive the moments she treasured the most. Always involve her and don't make her feel like she is out of place, but never force her. Trust me, old people are hard to understand, unless we really become like one and experience it for ourselves. And usually for old people, blackmail, bribery, and trickery makes it worse. Just be patient with her and always be nice...Take it from me, as I've worked with many old people in my life and also having many elders in my family. Merry Christmas and tell your Nan I sent my greetings. GOOD LUCK! :)
2007-11-28 05:58:01 · answer #2 · answered by joe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i found with my gran she felt it was a burden and she didn't want to burden us. if shes happy to stay where she is among the people she has got to know, then let her stay, they will have a good christmas in there, visit her ,she will appreciate that more probably. just say to her that you are offering and its up to her and you will respect her wishes, she may even change her mind if she feels she not being cornered so to speak. hope this helps.
2007-11-28 06:49:54 · answer #3 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard to change an older person's mind, especially if she thinks that she is a burden to the family. Try tell her that she is being unfair to the family. Maybe making her feel guilty if she does not will work. Just tell her that if she does not, she will be making it hard on everyone, etc...
2007-11-28 04:53:02 · answer #4 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey im sorry to hear about that maybe the next few weeks comeing up to christmas get her to come out on short trips just really short maby just out side the old peoples home just until she gets use to it but dont push her she mite me scared or worried about somthin good luck!
2007-11-28 04:52:03 · answer #5 · answered by leah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let her stay there then, and make all the family go see her. maybe shes just lazy and doesnt want to leave. maybe she has a man friend there?
2007-11-28 04:57:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell the home to give her an eviction notice for one day.
2007-11-28 06:11:41 · answer #7 · answered by foosieboy1953 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She wont come to the mountain?Take the mountain to her!
2007-11-28 05:55:03 · answer #8 · answered by uptoyou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋