My brother is 34 y/o. He still lives with my mother who works full time, pays everything and he pays nothing and contributes nothing. She even pays someone to mow her lawn when he is fit and able. She complains to you constantly but won't take any advice. What do you do?
2007-11-27 17:39:03 · 22 answers · asked by Aus_angel 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
r c.... i havent lived with my mother since i was 16 :)
2007-11-27 17:43:03 · update #1
nothing
if she cant see/do anything so far, it will never change.
your comfort is that you know he'll stay a loser like this forever.
2007-11-27 17:42:01 · answer #1 · answered by lk_sf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mother's are by nature committed to their children in a very mothering way. And it looks like after all these years she is not going to change. Have you thought about talking to your brother, telling him that is not always going to be able to support him, and you may point out that if he really loves her, he will stop using her. Try and shame him about his ways, tell him you love her and it is breaking your heart that she lets him us her.
It may work or may not.
2007-11-28 01:47:37 · answer #2 · answered by Enoch J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard for any mother to accept the fact her "kid" is a loser...It's even harder for that particular individual ( the brother ) to admit his misbehavior...One faces difficult situation here: things like that tend to stay the same for a long time, sometimes until one of the protagonists die...
2007-11-28 01:44:38 · answer #3 · answered by javornik1270 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow I'm really sorry that you kids were not raised to be respectful friends.
I'd set a good example by being the best person/sibling possible (assuming you even know how) and let them deal with their lives the best they know how.
2007-11-28 03:43:10 · answer #4 · answered by jimrich 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear, be proud your out on your own and got your s*** together. You do nothing. Your mother is a adult and doing what she wants...He is a loser...Your a winner! When she complains..say got to go and hang up. Do that every time she complains...
2007-11-28 01:47:13 · answer #5 · answered by Cinnamon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly I'd say to my mom, look I love you but you allow him to sponge off of you and I don't really care to hear about the issues you have with him, if you have a problem with my brother you should take it up with him. Then again she could be looking to you to say something to your brother about how he behaves and his actions. She may be looking for help, as a mom I know we sometimes don't like to hurt our children's feelings. Best of luck to you and your mom!
2007-11-28 01:43:04 · answer #6 · answered by Lori M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing you can do. It's her call, she has to decide she doesn't like the situation enough to do something about it.
The only thing you can do, is NOT to listen to her complaints.
Simply tell her that you have already given her advice and it's up to her to take it, but until such time, you can no longer be her sounding board about that issue.
2007-11-28 01:42:49 · answer #7 · answered by RoseWhite 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make a list of amounts of money she will be saving by kicking his dead butt out! all the way down to the air he breathes in forfeiting her from clean air! haha. but no really money talks, and when she finds out how much she really spends on him, she will make her decision. time for the 34 year old to get a job!
2007-11-28 01:43:04 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Exactly, the only way that anything is going to change is if she actually does somthing about it. She needs to go to him and say to his face that he needs to moveout and find a place soon, or be forced out.
2007-11-28 01:42:45 · answer #9 · answered by cowzoo33 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is going to land in trouble soon.Ask to start svaing handsome amount which will come handy once she stops earnings as your bro is not going to help her in old age
2007-11-28 01:43:35 · answer #10 · answered by ps g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don't.........your mom see him as a son in need of his mom.
you need to ask your brother to take a ride with you. when you get to the swamps of mississippi, throw a 5 spot out of the car's window and tell him to retrieve it......that should take care of your mom's problem plus feed the gators
2007-11-28 01:47:09 · answer #11 · answered by LITTLE_JOHN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋