military deploying honest help please asap!!!!!?

Question

well my husband is in the army he will be deploy to iraq in may of next year he want me to go back home to finish school in Jan but i want to spend the rest of the month with him before he goes but the thing is thats creating a problem with us cause he want me to go now and doesnt understand the fact that i wanna spend more time with him before he goes for 2 years or 15 month
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plz dont be rude just help me out honestly please oh and im not intersted in spelling checks
thanks god loves yall

Answer 1

Can't you go back to school later on? Your husband should be very pleased that you want to stay with him and spend those last few days before he deploys. That's real love and loyalty. He must see that!

Answer 2

Take into consideration how much of the next few months he'll be spending in training. I'm sure there will be some type of 2 week training before a 30 day training. Then there is field recovery and pack up again. Not to mention loading the equipment. There are endless ranges, classes, and medical processing going on before a deployment. Take all that into consideration. I'm sure once you see a training schedule (usually given out an FRG meeting), the only free time he'll have is weekends and a few days before the deployment. You may find yourself staying home from school by yourself. Go to school and work something out with your advisor during the weeks just prior to the deployment.

Answer 3

I am a military wife also and COMPLETELY understand what you are going through. School is important, yes, and he is the one deploying, yes. He will have it hard. He will miss you and all his friends and family. He'll be away from everything he knows and loves. Blah, blah blah.

But what about you? You're not being selfish, it just makes more sense to spend as much time as possible together before he leaves. Since he's in the Army, his deployment will probably be 12-18 months and that's a long time! Why extend it an extra 5 months? How can you cultivate a relationship like that without all the other added stress of an upcoming deployment. How will you be able to concentrate on school being away from him anyways? School can wait.

Talk it out with him, tell him you need to stay with him before he leaves. If he loves you, he will understand and want you there with him too. Hope everything goes well.

(You could also make a compromise to transfer somwhere close to where you guys is stationed. That way you're both happy.)

Answer 4

I can understand both view points here. Your wanting to spend as much time with him as possible before going on to finish school and his wanting you to go now. Perhaps he feels that your staying will make it harder for him and you to say good bye, especially at Christmas time. He wants you to be secure in your future. This is done by your concentrating on finishing your education. His love and loyality are showing by his putting your future and well being first before any depression and sadness of a separation. Sit down with him and explain your view point as to WHY you want to stay. Then ask him his reasnons for his NOT wanting you to stay. Most academic college classes do not start until the second week of January. You could stay until the day or so after Christmas and still make any last minute registration for school. I can assure you that it would be a great missed opportunity if you do not spend this Christmas together.

Dr. Tommy skelton
USMC retired (to many missed Christmas Holidays)

Answer 5

Well you dont have to go right now explain to him school can wait until he leaves its not that huge of an issue, you guys live on base? Maybe he is like some Families who want to give up housing to collect housing allowance before he leaves maybe get ahead in bills pay off bills... I know many spouses who left before the Soldier did for that reason.
I understand how you feel wanting your time with him before he deploys and he should respect your feelings about that.
I wish you luck,
Armywife & Soldier

Answer 6

For God sakes, talk to someone at the school.
They can be flexible if you tell them what your problem is and you give them a chance.
Who knows, you may be able to do a lot of the work at home and only have to go into school once or twice a week for an hour or so.
Talk to them!

Answer 7

It seems to me that something else is up and your school is the excuse for him to do something he has no business doing. I think you are right to put off school until he goes. This is your husband. If he loves you that much then he should understand how important it is for you too to spend as much time together as possible. You two are going to be separated for a while and it's going to be tough. It's good to see that he is concerned about your school but it seems to me like he has something to hide. You may want to check him.

Answer 8

It sounds like your husband only wants whats best for you. I think he would like it if you were in school while he prepares to ship out.

God bless you both!

Answer 9

what about punctuation?

bottom line: do what is best for you, keeping in mind that ALL expenses incurred with moving home during a deployment are on your dime, and BAH remains at the duty station location. If you are currently in housing, you lose it if you are gone for more than 30 days.

Answer 10

This might sound bad but it's not intended to be.
The most logical thing for you to do is to finish school. This is important to him & it should be more important to you. You are letting your emotions get the best of you. And when you do that...well either way there is going to be resentment.

If you were my daughter I would tell you to finish school. You still need to take care of yourself.