My dog or the college?

Question

I have a dog & have had 4 the past yr. I'm going 2 attend college next year & when I bought my dog I had it all worked out because I was going 2 move n w/ my dad and be able 2 keep him, but the situation with my dad whom I've never lived with be4 now, is not working out so I now have 2 schools 2 choose from. 1 is commutable 2 from my home and so I could keep my dog and just drive to school everyday. The problems w/ this option are that altho the school offers my major, it's not a great college and I will also not ever have the college experience of dorms and stuff which most people say is a must. My other option is a really good private school that's based around majors like mine & gives gr8 opportunities 4 the future. The downside is that I rly love my dog and they told me no dogs allowed, & its 4 hours from my house so its not commutable. I dont know what 2 do. Im willing 2 just live at home and go to a crappy college because my dog is my responsibility but I dont want to regret it.

You are not allowed to live off campus for college for the first year of college unless you can commute from your home which has to be less than 50 miles away. you guys have all been very helpful to me, Im still not sure what exactly I will do but Im glad to see that Im not being psycho since i worry about this and you guys agree that its a tough decision, cuz i have a few friends that have pets and dont have near as much trouble deciding this stuff they just automatically say college but i feel wrong choosing that especally without any debate

Answer 1

We can't make this decision for you. But I can give you some advice. I also had the choice to go to a 'better' university and live the dorm life through college, or stay home and go to a private college, which may have not been as good. I chose to live with my parents and go to the private college. I did very well in school, and graduated with a degree that I can use, and now I am working at a job that I LOVE. And I got my job very easily, they didn't care what school I went to, just that I had a degree and experience in a similar field. And because I was living at home, I saved enough money that I was able to rent an apartment right after I graduated. I am GLAD I 'missed out' on the dorm experience. My brother is going to a good university now, and he is living in a dorm. But because of all the parties, he is doing very poorly in school, and doesn't have enough money to pay for tuition, so now he has to free load off my other brother, and go to a community college. So dorm life is FUN, but it isn't always best for doing well in school.

Now there are other aspects to look at. If you are going to choose to go to the private school, choose to go because it is a better school, not for the dorm life. Maybe you could talk to people who have graduated from both schools, and see if they got a good job, and if they are happy with it. It would be great to be able to live at home and save some money, and be able to keep your dog. But if it is going to be better for your future to go to the private school, then I think that would be the way to go. You won't be able to keep your dog, so maybe you can find a close friend or family member who would be willing to take care of your dog. Someone you can trust, where you know he will be dearly loved. If you can't find anyone to take him, you can always talk to a No Kill Animal Rescue Organization. I know it sucks that you would have to give up your dog, but it might be better for your future in the long run.

Now, this is just what I personally would do. I would stay home and go to the closer college and keep my dog. I know that is what would be best for Me. But only You know what will be best for you. Good Luck!!

Answer 2

The good college no doubt. I guess I don't even see it as a hard decision. School (and living within the social environment) is so important, and living on your own is so important too. You have the opportunity to do both next year. Dorm it for a year or two, and then get roommates together for a house off-campus (if they allow college kids, they usually allow dogs too!). Commuting is crap - why set yourself up early on for that? Live within walking/biking to work/school if at all possible. Find a friend or neighbor to adopt the dog from you, temporarily if that's possible - as hard as that will be on you, you're young and you have your whole life ahead of you. It is a dog, not an actual child (sorry pet-owners!! I have both.), and the decisions you make now really do affect the rest of your life. Go for the good school!! As a contrast, I hope you asked this question as well on the "Education/Higher Education" page - I'm betting the answers will be opposite of "keep the dog, commute to the crappy school!". Good luck to you.

Answer 3

Boy what a problem. You have to protect your future and I agree about the dogs. If the floods came and the rescuers would not take my dogs,I would not get in the boat.

Is there anyone you know who would dog sit for you while you are away?? Depending on number of hours taken you might could get all your classes in a 3 day week and go home and do lots of home work and be with the kids. Or see what the cost of a small house near your chosen college and maybe get a roommate to help with expensive.

And I personally think the dorm room thing is very overrated. Maybe I just like my own space. But I find that distracting and not conducive to study.

I hope this works out for you.

Answer 4

Can your mom or a friend take care of your dog while you're at college? If so, I'd definitely go with the better college.

If not... I agree it's really tough. College and the college experience is vital to the rest of your life. Your dog's important... but so's the rest of your life.

First, I would recommend that you talk with your high school counselor, college counselors and friends. Maybe go on YA and ask for advice specifically about your major. Ask people if, in your major, it would likely make a large difference in your future if you went to a better college. With some majors it just doesn't make that big of a difference. With other majors it makes a huge difference.

Are you going to be working while in college? Maybe you could compromise with roommates or an apartment. Sort of half dorm life. Does the college have any non-dorm housing, where you could keep your dog?

How well behaved is your dog? If your dog has issues (like separation anxiety) or has more energy than you can handle, it will likely be difficult to keep her in an apartment with roommates, so this is something to consider.

If your mom or a friend can't keep your dog, and you go to the private school, what will happen to your dog? Is she young and well-trained so you could find a good home for her? Do you have any friends who might want a dog? You sound responsible, so I don't think you'd just ditch your dog, but this is definitely a major thing to consider, if you can find a good home for her.

I know it's not easy. It's not easy being young and having a dog. Get advice, think about it... whatever you choose may never feel like the right option.

Good luck!

ADD: To complicate the advice further... everyone's talking about the value (or lack thereof) of living on campus. I LOVED living in the dorms. I had a grand time and made many really, really close friends. I'd strongly recommend dorm life, but then I also realize that it wasn't such fun for all my friends and it varies by the school.

On that matter, here's my thoughts. First, what's your personality like? Are you shy or outgoing? Do you make friends easily or does it take a while of daily contact to make really close, intimate friendships? Do you like to party and hang out a lot or are you more comfortable at home in your "own space"? I'm more the latter, so I don't know that I would have made as many friends if I wasn't in the dorms. Other people who are more outgoing and more willing to stay out all night (away from their home) would be a lot better living off campus.

I'd also look into the dorm life. Ask grads if they're happy they lived in the dorms. Each college is different. Some may have wonderful dorm life and student activities while others aren't at all worth it.

Again, good luck!

ADD 2: Here's another thing to consider: When I graduated, I was without work for a while. I finally found a job, but it was one of those "pay your dues" kinda jobs... meaning they didn't pay much to get good experience. Then I quit... then I floundered... now I'm in grad school. I have supportive parents to help me with my dog. He lived with my parents when I couldn't find a place that allowed dogs and when I was in college.

Again, it depends on your major. Some you'll likely get a high paying job right out of college. Others will be a lot harder and you need to expect to work at a low-paying job in order to work your way up the company ladder.

Consider your major. If need be, you may need to think about sacrificing your dog after you graduate as well... I know from personal experience it's really, really hard having a dog when you're young.

I so want another dog right now... I want to show and train... but I know it's still not time. I'm still not stable and it wouldn't be fair to me or a dog (or my parents) to get another one when I might have to find a place in a few months where it will be difficult to keep a dog. Soon... very soon...

Answer 5

Well, would your family member that you live with now be willing to take care of your dog and keep him/her until you are done with school/or move into an apartment that allows dogs (after a year of the dorm experience)? Or maybe there is another person who'd be willing to do this for you.

You really should choose the great school and give yourself the best chance possible at a great future.

Answer 6

Just because a college has a dorm isn't everything! I went to a college with no dorm and I have a dog too. The college is close to home and I can go 2 and from.

Just because people say dorms are everything their really not. Would you jump off a bridge just cause they said it you need to experience it?

I would stay at home and go to the college that is close to your house because you have a dog to take care of and dogs are a lifetime commitment.

Answer 7

Wow, that's really a tough call and something only you can decide.

If you find someone to care for the dog while you're at school, the people and the dog will become attached to each other and wouldn't be fair to the people or the dog when the time comes for you to take him back. If you really want the better college, then you should find the dog another good home.

Answer 8

will your college let you live off campus??
The whole dorm experience is over rated. When i moved off to college, i lived in an apartment off campus so i could keep my pets. Even when i transferred schools, they said i had to live on campus, but i appealed it. It was a lot of work, but if you know how to work the system, i would so you can keep your dog.
I would not give up your education for your dog, but i would exhaust ALL efforts to see if you can live off campus and have your dog. If you can't, i would go to the college you want, the one that will be the best for your discipline, you can still go home on weekends and holidays to visit.

Answer 9

I don't think dorms are a must when going to school. For what I pay for a room ina big house with my friend is the same what i would pay for a dorm room. And in the dorm they sleep 4 to a room. I am enjoying college very much with out living in the dorms. I think though you should choose which ever college would be best for your future. Don't choose it on the living situation. good luck.

Answer 10

Pets do become a part of us don't they. And this becomes a big decision in ones life that we have to make. Is there no one you trust to keep the dog while you go to college so you can visit it?

I just hate to see your schooling suffer because, but I also would hate for you to be so lonely and miss your friend also.

I sure hope you get a plan and it works well for you. No matter what your decision I am so proud of you for knowing that your pet is your responsibility. Very mature of you.

Vee