question for parents. if your child were misbehaving in public?

Question

would you discipline them in public (meaning a spanking) or just let it go???

i usually snatch my kids up for a trip to the restroom but it doesn't happen often and when it does, i'm at a loss for words

Answer 1

This is a hard question to answer in spite of the fact that you've gotten lots of answers.

Now days if you spank a child in public, you run the risk of being arrested.

You don't say how old your children are and I think this makes a difference.

With my first child, I lived in a small town and he thought he was the cats meow. If I took him in a store and he wanted something and I told him no, someone else in the store would give it to him and glare at me like I was some kind of horrible parent.

With my second child (12 years later) and in a different town, I changed tactics. I taught her 3 rules.

#1: if it isn't yours, don't touch it without permission.

#2: Don't hit unless someone hits your first (my first child would hit when he didn't get his own way).

#3: Don't lie to me. If you do, give your soul to God because your *** is mine.

This seemed to cover just about every situation.

With my grandchildren, even when they were small, I had a talk with them before we went into a store. I made it clear to them that they were not to grab stuff, cry for stuff, or in anyway misbehave. If they did, I simply left my cart where it was, apoligized to the employees in the store, took the children home and went back to the store later. They soon learned if they wanted to go with me they had to behave. If they were good, I would buy them somehing. Usually just something inexpensive.

They learned early on not to push my buttons.

Good luck

Answer 2

Well, my kids don't often get spankings at home or in public.

Certain misbehavior warrants a spanking in our family, and if they do those things, whether we're at home, Grandma's, or at the supermarket, the punishment will be the same.

It's only taken a few times in public, though, and they don't misbehave that way.

But there is ceratinly a lot of middle ground between "spanking" and "letting it go." I don't let my kids run around like little hellions in public. When they start misbehaving, but I don't think it would warrant a spanking, they go to the "portable naughty corner." Basically, they know we WILL put them in the corner, even if we're in a restaurant, Walmart, the doctor's office, wherever. If nothing else, they know we will pack up and leave. We've only had to do that maybe three times ever, because they know it is NOT a happy homecoming for anyone.

Answer 3

Well I wouldnt recommend you spank them in public. I personally dont spank but if you must I would save that for when you get home later. But as for the immediate situation at hand... you discipline them right then and there. If you ignore the behaviour or give in to them (ie if they are throwning a tantrum because they cant have a toy or candy, etc..) then you are only enabling the behaviour for the future by setting the standard for how much and whatthey can get away with when you are in a public setting.

So a rule of thumb: if ou wouldnt tolerate the behaviour at home... then dont tolerate it in public!

Answer 4

First of all, spanking is a form of child abuse. All it teaches children is that if you are bigger and stronger, hitting is ok. If we have a problem with a superior or another adult, we don't hit them, we talk things through. Also, the ultimate goal is for children to do the right thing because they know from within that it is (this is called self-control). Hitting just get children to listen out of fear, and the second the "fear-factor" is removed, they do as they want.

As for misbehaving in public, I feel it's best to prevent and not even let it get that far. So what I do with my son before I go anywhere is to make sure he had a snack and is not hungry. Low blood-sugar levels are to blame for a lot of tantrums! Second, I make sure I go over the rules with him before we get somewhere. If we go to the store, I tell him that we go in, we get what we need, that we don't have time to stop at toys, and that I expect him to stay with me. When we go to people's houses, I go over the house rules and what I expect from him, and always make sure he understands them...I usually have him repeat what I said, which he does with rolling eyes.

Once you are in a situation, it helps to give your children little jobs to do, i.e. pick groceries off the shelf, check things off the shopping list, be a great helper at a friends dinner party, etc. By keeping them involved and with a job, and making sure they know that whatever they do is really important, a lot of tantrums can be prevented.

If it really comes to a tantrum (which with my son usually comes when he's very tired or had a bad day), I stop what I'm doing, ignore everyone around me, and then hold my son by the hands and calmly talk to him. I explain what behavior I expect from him now, I acknowledge that he may be tired, and I explain that we need to get through this, and the quicker we are done, the quicker he can do what he wants. Staying calm is the key to this, because meeting anger with anger will only fuel more anger. But facing anger with understanding and a calm resolution will usually bring success.

Answer 5

I handle it right there. But you don't have to spank to handle it. That's a key point.

If you don't spank them, you can dish out the punishment right there - loss of privelege/treat/whatever, leave the store and go home - whatever is appropriate.

If you do spank, IMO it's not appropriate to spank your child in public. If they need to be spanked, you should remove them from the store/restaurant/whatever, and handle it in private. This is not only for the benefit of others around you, but spares the child unnecessary additional humiliation. When I see parents spank in front of God and everyone, it looks to me like they are trying to APPEAR in control, but have really lost complete control of the situation.

Answer 6

i would not spank in public! hit, slap, beat anything that is physical aside from picking my child up, or taking them by the hand and calmly walking out of the store. Get in my car and go home.

Then i would comence with what ever punishment i had in mind.

Sadly there are way to many people out in public who would think that if you even tapped your child to hard on the shoulder your abusing them. So why run the risk of having your face all over the evening news just because your child was misbehaving and you swatted them on the tush.

Answer 7

When my children are misbehaving in public, I try to redirect them or remove them from the situation. I don't spank though, and I really wouldn't spank in public. If my autistic daughter is throwing a fit, I do ignore her if possible, as any trying to correct the situation will usually make it worse.

Answer 8

you may desire to realize that parenting is tough. enormously regardless of if that's a small baby. in maximum situations, we are damned if we do, and damned if we don't. If we enhance our voice or punish our youngsters in public, we are undesirable mum and dad, and we could consistently difficulty if somebody spoke of as the CPS...then if we don't human beings think of we are undesirable mum and dad reason we're not doing lots. in my opinion, I even have 3 little ones decrease than 4. Grocery procuring with them is a nightmare. They cry and scream for any little factor they prefer, and that i forget approximately approximately them, and tell them that as quickly as they are in a position to ask appropriate, i might get it for them, yet until eventually then, no. we are additionally on an honest funds, so lots of the time, I purely locate the money for to purchase what we prefer, and can't arise with the money for $5 juices, or goodies. After a mutually as, they end crying, yet interior the mean time, i'm getting nasty looks. and that i additionally get nasty looks as quickly as I've had it, and carry my voice to them.

Answer 9

I wouldn't discipline my son in public. But I quietly say to him he will be punished when we get home. If he doesn't stop. I have seen to many parents in stores when their kids are misbehaving grab them as if they were a rag doll. You like to turn around and say. Hey take it easy with them.

Answer 10

I would not spank in public, actually I do not spank at all but that is not the question here.
I take my son out to the car and make him sit in his car seat for a time out. If he does not stop, then I will take him home and do a time out there.