My girl friend getting weird?

Question

Ok, so me and my girlfriend have been dating for 11 months on the 3rd, We have had a lot of ups and downs but mostly ups, and when we do have downs, we fix it right away. We used to be sex active over the summer(we are in the 11th grade), like, 2 or 3 times a week, And when school started we COMPLETLY stopped, right away, and its been 4 months of no sex (which im ok with). We do practice outtercourse on and off, this past weekend, we did, and we joke about it and stuff. We wanted to shower together over summer and never did, so I asked today if we could again and this is her exact response:

her- Oh, I dont know if thats a good idea at all.
her- i dont know if i would be comfortable
me- Its not like we are doing anything (intercourse)
her- I know i just cant im sorry
me- ok..
her - i respect you
me- ok, were done talking about it
her- ok thank you
me -yeah
her - if you cant accept it then i dont know

and i called her, apologized and we are happy again. im not sure whats the problem

Answer 1

High school girls are weird but my first thing is ...do you think she has some one on the side or somthing like that ?

Answer 2

for a lot of women, the shower is the ultimate personal space. That's why we take so long in there. A lot of us secretly do very gross things in there, like hawk shower loogies and buttfloss (because we shed hair and it tends to get stuck in bizarre places.) It's a small space and she probably doesn't want to share it, even non-sexually.

High school sex doesn't abide by any real world "sex rules". It's weird, you're weird and it's weird that you aren't having sex anymore. She may be having regrets about having gone so far because high school sex is a big deal and seems to be everybody's business and a girl can be labeled a "sl*t" even if she did it with one boy who is her boyfriend.

Try having a talk about why you aren't having sex sometime when you two are alone and cuddling or watching something lame on tv. See if that's how she feels.

A relationship is essentially two people who would be really really good friends if they didn't also have great sexual chemistry (not necessarily having sex). You should be able to talk about these things.

Answer 3

Could have been that she was just not interested in taking a shower with you at the time, but there could be issues she is having due to the fact you where once where intimate with her then you both stopped. Now I don't know what terms you had with her when you both stopped for school but like I said there could be issues that she has from this that you just don't know about. What I would do is to try and talk to her about your relationship in general and about your sex lives together making sure you both are comfortable where things are going and what has already happened. You should also make sure she is free to bring her issues up when she wants to because by air her issues you both can work through them.

Answer 4

Maybe she feels like you are forcing her to do something she isn't quite ready for yet. But if she trusts you, she will do what you ask. It's good that you guys talk: communication is key in any and all relationships.

But she is a girl, and she seems young (immature). If you can wait for her to grow up, then you will reap the benefits of being patient in a relationship. If you can't wait, then you may have to break up with her. Untreated, people not seeing eye-to-eye in a relationship will lead to bitterness and distrust. And if gets to that point, I would recommend quitting while you are ahead. It will make it a lot easier to sever with minimal to no hard feelings (depending on how mature the two of you are, and are willing to be around each other).

Good luck, and no matter what you do, repsect your gf's boundaries. She will respect you, and may even give in later when she sees that she can trust you ;)

Answer 5

Maybe she's afraid of getting caught...I know I would be. plus having sex is one thing your not just standing there looking at each others bodies you doing things with each others bodies...maybe she doesn't feel comfortable being with you in a place where you will be completely focused on her body. No matter what the case is you should just let it go for now. I'm sure she'll work through whatever is stopping her now or bring it up herself & talk to you about it when shes ready.

Answer 6

When you were having sex were you totally naked and in the dark? Being naked and showering is a whole different level of intimacy, it goes will beyond regular sex. Your exposing everything about yourself and for girls especially it's a difficult thing to do. Be paticent, it's a wonderful and exciting thing too. But give her time, everyone and I mean everyone is inscure about themselves no matter how much they play it off. Your just asking her to show you a level of insecurity. Talk to her, be open with her and maybe she'll respond in kind. God luck.

Answer 7

Well as showering together is quite open - she may be worried about her personal appearance and its making her nervous about what you'd think.

Yes i know you had sex. But thats not as open as showering.

Ignore the people who are complaining about what your choosing to do and at what age. Everyone has their own opinions.

To be honest this could be a lot of things - but one of the more obvious ones is that she is worried about her personal appearance or she may be concerned about things if they do go anyfurther - Serisouly - its quite hard to just shower without anything else going on...

Matt.

Answer 8

Ehh,
Well it's good that you apologized.
But maybe you should just let her tell you on her own..maybe she's just not sure about some things right now, or maybe there's something bothering her, girls normally shy away when there's something wrong, you should probably ask her and if she says nothing, ask her again and if she says nothing forget it, and she'll come around eventually
=] Hope it helped.

Answer 9

Are you ready to be a dad and pay child support? Are you going to stay with her when she is pregnant and feeling fat. Let her focus on school, she is probably afraid of getting pregnant and her main focus is graduating on time. Not to mention it takes a lot of confidence for a girl to do what you are asking. She is probably insecure, you need to stop pressuring her.

Answer 10

Young guys your age are hornier than girls the same age.
Guys like sex, girls like love.
If a girl doesn't feel love, but instead just feels like she's just being humped on, sex gets less exciting.
Maybe she's just not ready to be as sexually active as you want to be.

Answer 11

I think maybe she might be hiding something cus i mean taking a shower together is not nearly as bad as having sex.