What do you think of spanking as child discipline?

Question

I'm wondering general thoughts about spanking, as used with children under 12 as a form of discipline. Do you see it as abuse? Do you see it as abuse only sometimes? What are your experiences?

There is a debate in Massachusetts about the prospect of outlawing any form of spanking or corporal punishment by parents to children under 18. What do you think:

http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/4582708/detail.html?subid=22100410&qs=1;bp=t

Answer 1

I think spanking is fine it teaches lessons. Yes some people cross the line to abuse but they are far and few between

Answer 2

I think the occasional smack on the butt isn't going to do any harm. I imagine most of us on here got spanks and we grew up reasonably well-adjusted, I know I haven't turned into a serial killer or anything.

Unfortunately, there are always people who are going to take things too far. These people are going to hurt their kids regardless of whether there is a law saying that they can't or not. Personally, I've been seeing a lot of kids the last few years whose parents are against any form of physical punishment and their kids are no better behaved than anyone else's. When I was a kid, I knew that I got grounded, I got sent to the corner, mouth washed with soap (ok, this is starting to sound bad...) and if I was really bad, I got spanked. Now, my folks used wooden spoons and belts and I think that's too much. Open flat hand, once across the butt isn't going to hurt. 15 smacks with a hand or a belt is going too far.

The government interfering with the way children are raised. So what happens when a person lightly smacks their 1 year old on the hand when they're trying to touch the stove? Doesn't everyone do that? Is that now a form of child abuse? OMG, my son must be abused because he probably gets a hand-smacking about 6 times a day!

Next it'll be, if your child can't read by the time he's four you must be abusing him otherwise he would be progressing quicker!

Answer 3

I am SO for it! Growing up my dad spanked us but only when it was well deserved and only with his open hand and never with any other object. I was never much of a trouble maker but I tell you what, I thought twice before doing something I new I shouldn't just to avoid that hand to the back of my leg or my rear end! I never feared my dad because of this and we have always had an awesome relationship. We all just learned right from wrong and yes from no very early on. So, now that I am raising my own children I too use spanking as punishment and, yes, even threats. I sufficiently warn them before I do spank and like my dad I always use my hand and never hit my children with any thing else. There is such a thin line between discipline and child abuse and I would suggest that people really search deep within themselves before they give that initial spanking. Once you do it it is so easy to spank again and again. Some people can't control themselves and this leads to things more in the abusive area. I've seen it happen. We are from Kansas and I believe that they just made it legal to spank your children, even in public which I have never had to do, thankfully!

Answer 4

I think that it can be an appropriate punishment in some circumstances. If your kid does something very dangerous or steals, etc. I think spanking is appropriate. You should never spank out of anger (count to 10 before you spank.) You should have some kind of written down agreement with your partner on when spanking would be appropriate so you can make sure you're consistent. You should never spank hard enough to leave a mark. (That means your spanking much too hard.)

I was spanked as a child and I believe that I deserved it in every circumstance that the punishment was used.

Answer 5

This is one of those topics that is so controversial. I can say i spanked my son one time.. I felt awful. he cried i cried and well.. it did nothing for either of us.. I was spanked when i was quite young.. I didn't like it. That i know. I guess as a parent, you have to do a feel for what you think is right by your kids and yourself for discipline. I don't choose to tell anyone whats right or wrong with there way of punishment... I just instead try to think how things make a child feel. I for sure do not want to send him the wrong message, that hitting is a good way to get your way yet i don't want my child in harm or to get hurt. Especially not feel degraded or embarrassed either. My opinion for what it's worth.

Answer 6

I think a good hard swat on the butt is sometimes the BEST way to get a point across with little ones. As long as you don't do so with the intention of inflicting pain, but putting an exclamation point into the equation, its fine. You are responsible for giving LIFE lessons as a parent. Letting the child know how serious you are and thereby capturing their undivided attention can save you a lot of problems further down the road!

Answer 7

I believe spanking is discipline..I get told all the time how well behaved my girls are... they have NEVER had discipline problems in school,have respect for ALL ADULTS,and have great grades. And I,m very open, liberal parent..I let them express there views and opinions(there 13yrs old and they have many lol) And each child is different.. one of mine has been spanked alot.. the other one I can count the times on both hands. But I see parents everyday who cant control there kids, begging and pleading and threatening time out... it doesn't work with ALL kids .. we have MORE and MORE kids in jail and dropping out of school for BEHAVIORAL issues... quit blaming TV and Video games and get the balls to be there PARENT not there friend. My dad was a police officer... he seen what happened when a child was given "choices" and "reasoned with"... we were spanked NOT ABUSED.. we never where chocked or punched, kicked ect. And no it doesn't teach them to hit others... that's also your job to teach them not to hit there playmates. We have became more passive in parenting and it shows

Answer 8

i think its fine i was spanked as a child i am not afraid of my parents nor was i ever yes sometimes it is taken overboard like leaving bruises but i dont think spanking is a bad thing dont use weapons such as a wooden spoon(hurts bad!) or a belt(also hurts bad) use your hand and if it hurts your hand you did it too hard yes kids do need discepline but not to be abused but if siblings are fighting and one hurts one another then dont spank that adds to the violence but i totally believe in spanking my child but dont take all anger out on the child they didnt deserve that is abuse but a spankin to where they know they did something wrong but still can sit down.

Answer 9

Below is a link to a similar question.

Ultimately the answer voted best was, yes spanking could be included in disipline without being abuse.

Answer 10

I think it is ridiculous.They have no RIGHT to tell me or anyone else who to raise their children..This is a parents own personal choice.I am all for spanking.There is a difference between spanking and abuse.Honestly,wether they pass a law or not,I will continue to raise my children as I see fit regardless of what anyone tells me I can or can't do.