me and my hubby are not catholics but i want to become a catholic and wnat my children baptised catholic?

Question

Ive been told by my local parish that it's toolate for me to start my "training" to become a catholic for this year and that they won't baptise my children unless one of us our catholic. Im currently baptised as c of e. I find it very unfair that my children are being punished for no fault of their own. is there any way i can fight this?

Answer 1

Do the course next year and once it's completed then have your children baptised. I really don't see that this is a big deal!

Answer 2

Patience is a virtue my friend...

I have to ask.. what is c of e?

No one is being punished, you just made your deision too late for this year. Most RCIA classes start in September. So you have missed a lot already and it would be a bit late to catch up after missing about 12 weeks of learning.

And beleive me, there is a lot to learn! The classes end at Easter. I am going through the class right now.

And again, no one is being punished, just remember to look for it next year... Usually they will start announcing it in August.

For now, you should attend Mass every Sunday and take in as much information as you can. Showing good faith will get you farther than fighting.

I am a member of my Parish, even though I am not "fully initiated" into the Church. You can be a member and participate in a lot while you wait until the appropriate time for your Sacraments.

If there is a DIRE circumstance that makes you want the kids baptised, such as a deadly illness, talk to the Priest about it. They may be able to do some sort of emergency Baptism for the kids.

Just be open to discuss your concerns with the Priest. He may be able to help you to understand the sacraments and when they are appropriate.

Answer 3

Peronally, I think it strange that your first instinct is to "fight" the very Church you claim to want to join. . .
Let's take this one piece at a time. Shall we?


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Non-Catholic adults who wish to convert to Catholicism MUST complete their parish's RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) program. Typically, the more you know about Catholic beliefs and practices, the quicker you can complete the program. It might not be a bad idea to use this time for independent study.


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You children are not being "punished". In having their child(ren) Baptized Catholic, the parents are promising to raise and educate their children in the Beliefs and Practices of the Catholic Church. How effective can the parents be when they are non-Catholic?

So, you see, the Church is actually looking out for the Spiritual wellfare of your children by not administering Baptism's "on-demand" so to speak.

NOTE: If your children are already Baptized "in the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit", there is no need for them to receive a second Baptism.

Answer 4

Your children are not being punished.

A Catholic baptism is only valid if the person being baptized either (a) has knowledge of the Church and will further his/her own education in the Catholic faith or (b) has parents who can raise him/her to know and understand the faith.

When you've completed your training and are confirmed Catholic, they can be baptized, because the Church will be assured that you are there to educate them. Before that time, there is still a chance that you will change your mind about Catholicism.

Since it's too late for you to enroll in RCIA, but you are eager to get going, why not ask the priest if there is a retired priest or sister who can give you the RCIA training privately to get you caught up to where the class is? There might not be any available, but it doesn't hurt to ask. I was very eager, too.

Also, just so you know, the whole bit about "is there any way I can fight this" is one of the things that the priest will try to help you grow out of as you prepare to become Catholic. Catholicism isn't about in-fighting and changing the standards that are set for everybody. It's about unity. What goes for one, goes for all.

I couldn't have my children baptized before I became Catholic either. My two that were already born before I took instruction in the Catholic faith were baptized Anglican. When I became Catholic, their baptisms were "transferred" with a profession of faith by my husband and I (we converted together) and their Catholic godparents, where we promised to raise the kids Catholic. Then the one who was born after that was baptized Catholic.

So if your kids were baptized in your Church of E, they don't need to be rebaptized Catholic.

Answer 5

So you're not even a Catholic yet, and you are already arguing with the teachings of the Church? If you want to be Catholic then I assume you realize that among the Christian churches, only the Catholic Church has existed since the time of Jesus. Every other Christian church is an offshoot of the Catholic Church. The Eastern Orthodox churches broke away from unity with the pope in 1054. The heretical protestant churches were established during the Reformation, which began in 1517. Only the Catholic Church existed in the tenth century, in the fifth century, and in the first century, faithfully teaching the doctrines given by Christ to the apostles, omitting nothing.

So, trust the Church, and its 2000 year old traditions. It know what its doing

May I suggest that you go to Catholic Answers at http://www.catholic.com and then look at the left sidebar: You will see many subjects. You can click on one and see tracts that will probably answer your questions. Also, the search engine will search 20 years worth of articles from "This Rock" magazine. There are a lot of great articles there too

Also, the"official" Catechism Of The Catholic Church is online at: http://www.usccb.org/catechism/text/entiretoc1.htm
This is a difficult document to read. (The book is about three inches thick!) But, there is a wealth of information there too if you take the time to learn how to navigate it.

Answer 6

If you've only talked with the religious education office, I'd bring it up to the priest - he may be more understanding and less bureaucratic.

I'd also go to another Catholic parish. If you intend to join the Catholic Church through RCIA (even if it is too late this year to start the classes), there should be no problem to having your children baptized. If you have Catholic godparents picked out, this should also not be a problem.

Note that almost every church - denominational or not - requires some form of education before joining. A friend of mine, who is VERY well versed in Scripture, had to go through a 12-week course before joining her evangelical free church.

Answer 7

First let me state that I am not a priest. A few priests do hang around here and might give you better information.

I hope you take everything I say here as helpful. Maybe your first step is to change your mindset, please do not think of "fighting" with your church or your priest. Rather I think you need to ask your priest for help. I do not think (but am not 100% sure) that the parents need to be Catholics in order for a child to be baptized Catholic. That said, the priest will want some evidence that you and you husband truly intend to raise the children Catholic. Is there a Catholic grandparent, aunt, uncle, or other family member who can act as Godparent? This might reassure the priest that the child will be raised Catholic.

The normal way an adult converts to the Catholic church is to attend RCIA classes (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults). In general, these classes begin in the fall, and the new members of the church are baptized and confirmed at Easter. Apparently you missed the enrollment deadline. My recommendation is to make an appointment to meet with your priest and explain your situation honestly (and not confrontationally). Maybe you and the priest can arrange some sort of private instruction. Most priests want to help you. Most priests want to encourage new members into their congregation.

If your local parish is not all that helpful, call around to a different parish. I bet you can find a kind and loving priest to help with your situation.

Answer 8

The reason they do this is because they do Catechism classes for those who want to become Catholics. They're then Baptised at the Easter Vigil. The probable reason they won't let you start this year is because the classes are too far ahead for you to catch up on. You can't really fight it, but you can still celebrate mass with the parish and get a feel for the mass, you just can't partake in the Eucharist.

Answer 9

Bless your heart!

Unfortunately, some parishes tends to do things themselves and choose not to follow the Church and the Catechism. It's never too late to join. As long as you were baptized in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost, your baptize is valid and you don't need to get baptized in the Catholic Church.

If RCIA classes aren't being held right now what you can do is buy a copy of the Catechism of the Catholic Church and read it along with your Bible. It teaches everything Catholics believe and why. It's the best tool you can have for the time being.

If you have any questions please feel free to e-mail me and I'll try to help explain things to you. I'm in the same boat.

Answer 10

The Catholic Church requires converts to go to classes (RCIA) to learn about the Catholic faith before letting someone convert. They want to make sure that you know what the Catholic Church teaches before you become a member of the church. Not everyone who takes RCIA classes decides to become a Catholic. Becoming a Catholic is not like buying a pair of shoes that you may or may not like a year from now. The Catholic faith is a way of life.

Considering that not all people who go to RCIA classes decides to become a Catholic, it just makes sense that children are not baptized Catholic until at least one parent becomes a Catholic. Would you make sure that your children were raised in teh catholic faith if you decided to not become a Catholic? Probably not.

I would suggest that you go to Mass and learn as much as you can about the Catholic faith before joining the RCIA class. That way, you will be the star of the class.

Answer 11

Your children are not being punished. They cannot be baptised because you are not catholics - whats hard to understand about that? You can get your children baptised in a CofE Church without difficulty. I bet you just want them to go to a catholic school when they are older.