How to deal with a negative mother??

Question

Okay...Im pretty sure my mother is crazy. But shes been that way my whole life. After high school I swore I would never move back home. But after college I found myself right back where I swore Id never go! Ive been living at home again for about 2 weeks....Ive already had enough. My mother is overly religious. Meaning everything is the devil. Everyone is a horrible person. Everything is bad! I swear she says horrible, obsurd, awful, evil etc. a few times everyday. She will start to talk normal then all of a sudden its right back to being negative . I cant take it!!!!! But shes my mother. And I cant comfront her about this believe me. She snaps into a crazy, cussing, psycho person if I comfront her about herself. She goes crazy on me a few times a year. Shes always right and everyone is always wrong. She comes across as normal person. But I have to live with this. How do I handle having such a negative mother? Is there anything I can do without actually comfronting her about it?

Answer 1

Hey, wait, are you my long lost sister because I swear to God you just described my mother to the tee!!!

I had to cut ties. It wasn't easy, but she made me and my children miserable. My mother's problem was she had a hysterectomy when I was 5 (we won't discuss age, lets just say it was a lonnnnnng time ago), for some reasons the doctors NEVER put her on hormone replacement. Let me tell you, there's nothing worse than sitting in the school lunch room just to have your mother burst in in a house coat and curlers screaming at the top of her lungs because I forgot to put the cap on the tube of toothpaste. She's at the age now where shes too old to change, and I'm to tired to try to make her. I swear if you're not my sister, then you are me in a in another life. Get out. If you have to pack your bags and escape through the bathroom window. Stay at a friends, a cardboard box, whatever you have to do, RUN!!!

Answer 2

Your mother might have some emotional problems, but that doesn't make her psycho.... if she's angry and stressed or has emotional upset, she will get help when she realizes she needs it, or that help is available.

You could always urge her to talk to a doctor, but from what you say, it might make her more negative and angry?

I think that, since you do not want to be like your mother and you do not enjoy being around her negativity and other behaviors, you could work at being a different type of person.

I know it's difficult to live with someone who is like this... believe me, my father was, too... sometimes we have to accept others at face value and control our own emotions... without letting them get to us....

hugs

Answer 3

You don't have to live with it! Moving out is hard, and expensive, but if it means that you will be happier, more comfortable and able to relax, then it's worth it.

You knew what you were getting into before you went home, so there's no need to be rude or disrespectful to her. She's still your mom, despite her eccentricities. So take a deep breath, smile and start saving every penny you can!

Answer 4

make a level to not in any respect take her heavily even as she acts like that. even as she says something unfavorable, basically snort like she made a funny tale and close the verbal change down. you could also provide her an expressionless stare, like you're waiting for her to end what she's affirming, then she'll get self-wide wide awake and run out of issues to assert. Make her the purely participant in her foolishness. i'm afraid a top away, verbal mind-set could basically make her protecting. i imagine it can be proper to have interplay truly certainly inclusive of her even as she is appearing properly, then snort and stroll away/dangle up even as she receives extraordinary. she probable is basically affirming stupid sh!t to get a reaction out of you, so do not strengthen her habit by reacting to at least something you do not opt for to take heed to back.

Answer 5

You don't have to live with her, you choose to. Either learn to live with it, or move out.