Describe as much of the fight in detail as you possibly can :)
2007-11-26 09:44:27 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Sports ➔ Martial Arts
For the purpose of this question we will assume that Hitler is alive. Although this wouldn't stop Chuck if he really wanted to fight you XD
2007-11-26 09:50:03 · update #1
Firstly i`d to say that chuck norris is so tough that he doesnt even need to read... he just stares the information out of the book!!
Chuck and the One nut wonder square off.. little bob and weave from ol 1 nut while chuck warms up on his new exercise machine (available on JJB sports TV sky page 638). 1 nut takes out his secret weapon a sleak but deadly black comb... carefully combs his fabulous facial hair and slicks back his fine wisps of hair.. A bead of sweat appears on the brow of chuck, he hasn`t broken sweat in 17 years... onlookers think that the lone wolf is worried... not a chance !the chuck only sweats when he chucks!! how did you think he got his name??? he puts down his copy of hustler and takes up his famous fighting stance.. he measures up 1 nut and throws a vicious spinning heel kick... Adolf anticipates this move as he is a Chuck Norris fan and has seen Missing in Action 76 times, the kick sweeps over the moustachioed ones head and and knocks over the berlin wall.. Chuck regroups and is taken aback... he never ever misses.. just then Eva Braun calls out "lone wolf, you hunk of a man, dont hurt my little snuggle bunny".... Chuck lowers his guard as he is taken back at the beauty before him, the 1 nut wonder see`s his chance and launches a vicious attack... His panzer move was feared all over the globe... but chuck side steps, a smirk appears in the corner of his mouth... " your not the only one with fabulous facial hair" says Chuck and grabs hold of Adolf`s one true love and tenderly kisses her ... o`l 1 nut screams out in pain and clutches his breast, rolls his eyes to heaven and crys out "why dear god why" he promptly dies of a broken heart... Chuck has won the day and a new love interest...
The world is once again free of tyranny and oppression thanks to perfectly groomed facial hair and super elastic but figure hugging levi jeans.
2007-11-27 12:08:05 · answer #1 · answered by K1_fan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chuck would win just by using a dim mak death stare, wouldn't even have to touch him.
You should be carefull typing chuck Norris on here! I got 11 points deducted for answering someone who asked 'Why dose the earth wobble?' with "The earth wobbles when chuck Norris does his press ups" Some people are afraid of the truth.
2007-11-27 05:51:06 · answer #2 · answered by always right 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chuck Norris and Hitler circle each other in the ring as the crowd goes wild. "Folks this will be a fight for the history books". Chuck goes for a high left karate kick as Hitler gets distracted by a jew. "Ahh that's gotta hurt Thom!" Hitler gets up and wipes away the blood dripping from the corner of his mouth. "Your not a pure German Chuck so your going DOWN!" Hilter says before he rips off his army uniform to reveal a colorful wrestling costume with a pair of matching horns. Hilter charges for Norris as Norris pulls out a red cloak to wave in the bull's *cough* I mean Hitler's face. Hitler is too slow and falls on his Nazi butt after Chuck moves out of the way. "Wait what is Chuck doing? OMG! Is he gonna do it? He is!" Chuck Norris finishes off Hitler with a curb kick! YAY! Chuck wins!
2007-11-26 17:58:58 · answer #3 · answered by kyokuncatlover 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well Chuck of course! First he would salute Hitler with the Winston Churchill peace sign and then whap the Sausage muncher in the eyes with the same fingers, as he lunges towards Chuck in anger. Chuck then issues a quick but powerful punch to the guts to floor Nazi Knicekrs. Once down on the floor Chuck would rip off Hitler's stupid pencil tash until he screamed like a big girl and then, as the old song tells us; "Hitler has only got one ball, the other is the Albert Hall!". Chuck could grab the creepy Kraut by his one puny nad and swing old slickbacked around lasso stylee over his head until girly old fatso flies off, screaming "swinehunt!" in ahigher than usual voice, into the middle distance becuase his puny plum came off! This really happened and is also why it is literally true that Hitler had no balls.
2007-11-26 17:57:40 · answer #4 · answered by bumbleboi 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Chuck Norris wins via roundhouse kick to the face, in a heroic fashion.
2007-11-26 20:58:46 · answer #5 · answered by Frank the tank 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There wouldn't be much of a fight. One is an athletic martial arts master, one was an out-of-shape politician. Chuck Norris would throw one punch or kick and the fight would be over, with Hitler flat on his back, whimpering and crying like a little baby. Oh, and he'd most certainly have wet himself.
2007-11-26 17:49:44 · answer #6 · answered by ACM 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Hitler was on the verge of discovering time travel; however he at the tome of the capture of Berlin he could only see into the future. He knew if time travel was possible Chuck was coming for him. That is why he offed himself and his girlfriend and ordered their bodies burned so Chuck wouldn't find them.
I know this for a fact John Tieter told me.
2007-11-26 18:02:45 · answer #7 · answered by SiFu frank 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Chuck norris
2007-11-26 17:51:46 · answer #8 · answered by mmm 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Chuck would pick the scrawny Kraut up by his 'tache, swing him round & round above his head till his leiderhosen fell down, exposing his mono-scrotum and then laugh copiously and gregariously in Hitler's terrified face, thus causing the German to have a massive heart attack.
Chuck would then rip out the dead, shrivelled heart and eat it with a light sauce of 20/50 engine oil.
2007-11-26 18:12:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The us never did envolve in WW2 chuck norris killed each and every nazi during WW2 including hitler.
However hollywood thought that they could never realisticly sell this to the movie audience. That's why they rewrote history
2007-11-28 11:16:18 · answer #10 · answered by peter gunn 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋