I told him and I went out and bought him Christmas gifts. Well on Christmas he accused me of cheating on him and said I didn't deserve to get anything from him. I didn't cheat on him and I don't know why his attitude changed so quick. I was able to take some of the things back but not all. When my birthday and valentines day had passed at the end of February we started talking again and he said he would make it up to me but he never did. He is still being nice to me telling me how much he loves me. Christmas is coming around again. Should I buy him gifts this year also should I be be preparing my heart for him to flip out on me again? I love him but part of me is still holding back because I'm afraid he'll hurt me again.
2007-11-26 05:47:00 · 26 answers · asked by hanna 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he makes a lot of money so he can afford to buy gifts
2007-11-26 05:50:29 · update #1
if ur afraid that he'll hurt you again; y r u still with him? u should have dump him and move on. or you can always talk to him and let him know. how your feelin about tis.
2007-11-26 05:49:50 · answer #1 · answered by honey + biscuit 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is hard to know after one Christmas whether or not this is a pattern or not. However for many people the holidays are emotionally a very difficult time and they tend to react as if under stress and do things they wouldn't nor mall do. Why not try to make a less of a deal of Christmas. Go on a mini trip or get play or concert tickets for each other and call it Christmas and just have a romantic date. Or talk about it ahead of time and put a small spending limit on the holiday like $40 bucks or something so it doesn't become a big deal. However be careful if these bursts of emotional instability do become a pattern he might not be healthy enough for a relationship right now.
2007-11-26 05:53:45 · answer #2 · answered by Jade645 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be prepared girl. Sounds like he's afraid of committing to you (or anyone), & is cheap. He left you at Christmas (didn't have to buy gifts...), made sure he skipped out on your birthday & Valentines Day as well, but started talking & trying to get back in after the "gift giving" days had passed. IF you really care about him, & IF you think you can handle the heartache again (because it just might), then wait it out . If you care enough about him to want to give him a gift, then sure, give him a gift. Gifts come from the heart, they should be given with no expectations of a return gift. Give it to him, even if he leaves you again...but if he leaves you, after you give him the gift, just say "here, I got this for you, & I want you to have it". Then turn around, walk away, & never look back. Good luck dear.
2007-11-26 05:57:55 · answer #3 · answered by RCgirl 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Either he spent all his money and didn't want to tell you why he didn't give you a present, or he's guilty of something and had to accuse you of something to take the heat off of himself. Even if you didn't know about it, accusing you is a popular tactic men use even when they haven't yet been caught. Could be anything though.
My opinion, I wouldn't get him anything. Make him a card, maybe a batch of his favorite sweet, but don't buy him a single thing. Head games aren't cool and that's what he's been playing. If he loves you and actually gets you a present, then your present will be up to par because you put your work into it as well as thought. If he doesn't like it, he's also too demanding to keep around. If he does, then great, all's well. Plus, if he doesn't like it or doesn't get you anything, you could always eat the sweets yourself. You could also make him a CD of his favorite songs. Money's usually tight around this time of year anyway, so it'll save you heartache and cash to go with the homemade gifts.
My opinion is that this isn't going to be a long term relationship. Sooner or later, the mind games come to a head and one of you will break up with the other. Maybe he'll learn from his mistakes, but maybe not. Just my opinion. Been there, done that and won't go back.
Good luck. I hope I helped.
2007-11-26 05:55:19 · answer #4 · answered by Top Alpha Wolf 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I'm sure your story is lacking in details. Why would he accuse you of cheating? Something must have happened between the time he wanted to know what you wanted for Christmas and Christmas Day?! Perhaps you should come forward with all the details before anyone can answer you. And as far as buying him gifts this year....NO, do not...or just get him a special Christmas card. In other words, do not go all out since it appears the two of you are having a casual relationship...friendship.
2007-11-26 05:53:44 · answer #5 · answered by Bodaciously Red 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think if you are afraid that you need to step away from him and let him know your feelings for him and tell him how you are feeling and that you don't wanna be hurt all over again and maybe things will roll more smoothly then last year but just give you too a break and back off for a little while maybe he will realize how bad he hurt you and understand how bad he feels for you and will do any thing in the world to prove to you that he wont do it again but until then i would take a break off for awhile...... hope i could help
2007-11-26 05:53:47 · answer #6 · answered by chelsea_hawkins2001 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, love hurts at times. Whether it's with him or another guy, you will get hurt at times, but other times it will be Great! If you love him, stay with him, talk about it, and try to fix things. And for christmas, get him something. But really personalize it. Show him, you love him and want to take time for him. Instead of just going to the store and buying something (which u can do too), personalize his gift.
2007-11-26 06:02:53 · answer #7 · answered by brown_eyes8750 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hold back, if he flips out again call him a cheap so and so and be rid of him and if he doesn't tell him you have a special gift. take him to a spa or luxury hotel for a weekend (can be booked after the holidays) and you can have the brochures mailed to you before.
2007-11-26 05:57:34 · answer #8 · answered by worldstiti 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you really want to hear what I think? If you do, don't buy him anything. He is probably lying. He sounds like a bad person and a user. You deserve better. In fact, you seem to be a good person and you deserve the best!
2007-11-26 06:04:25 · answer #9 · answered by Spirit Dancer 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes when a guy accuses their mate of cheating on them it is because he feels guilty for doing it himself and is trying to put the blame on someone else other than on himself. I say buy him something like a giftcard, so that if he decides to be a prick again and flip out on you, you can use it for yourself. =)
2007-11-26 05:52:20 · answer #10 · answered by Electric Dazeys 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm...maybe he is one of those kind of guys that becomes history around Christmas time and birthdays just to get off the hook from buying presents. Seriously, there are people out there that do that. And admit it...
2007-11-26 05:51:08 · answer #11 · answered by Slipped Halo 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋