I was really drunk one night and hooked up with a guy I just met. [I've never done anything like that before and I know I shouldn't have been so forward, so please don't judge.]
It's been about a month. He's been in touch ever since. He texted the night I left to make sure I made it back to my friends place safely. Called the next day. He hasn't gone more than a day or two without texting/messaging me and we've talked on the phone several times, sometimes for over an hour.
He's said things like:
"You really need to come back and visit."
"I love talking to you, seriously call anytime"
"You're so funny, I'm all about seeing you any time you can. I'll make time to see you"....etc.
Our personalities click. I'd like to see him again but it makes me nervous that he might have an ulterior motive to being nice, since I put out the first night we were together.
What do you think? Is he being genuine?
2007-11-26 04:53:39 · 24 answers · asked by autumn 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
When it happened, I was pretty drunk...and I don't think he was quite to my level. But we've had many sober conversations and I love talking to him.
My friends all know him...and say he actually is a really nice guy. But I'm skeptical, just because of how things happened.
2007-11-26 04:58:58 · update #1
You're not going to find out until you two meet up again. If you're nervous, take a few friends and meet in a public place. Or, just ask him..."Do you think I'm easy or do you really want to get to know me?"
2007-11-26 04:57:48 · answer #1 · answered by Moxie Crimefighter 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It isn't likely at all that he's being genuine. There's no respect there on his part, and there can't be because of what happened. There are many many people out there just looking for casual sex. Most of the time they don't come back around, but it still doesn't mean he's being sincere. I think if it were me, I'd play the game for a bit, and I'd play it knowing he thinks I'm fool enough to fall for it, only I wouldn't. That way you can at least show this guy that your not really the kind of person he thinks you are.
2007-11-26 04:58:55 · answer #2 · answered by cindy h 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Normally when a guy gets laid the first night he will usually NOT call and just get away with no problems. However, the fact that this guy continues to talk with you without getting laid makes me feel that he's sincerely interested in more than just sex. I think the best way to see if he has any alternative motives is to see him again, but don't sleep with him or give him any sexual attention. If he begins to get pushy about getting laid then you might be able to see his true colors; if that happens, tell him that you aren't that type of girl and if he bails you know he was only in it for one thing.
2007-11-26 05:02:34 · answer #3 · answered by flyboop_2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hes just trying to get a piece of a** trust me all of us guys are the same. hell i acted alot different towards my wife before we got married and she did the same thing and when we finally realized that neither one of us was the person we thought we are it put alot of stress our lives and we are lucky that we were able to work through it. but as far as to judge you for hooking up with a guy on your first night together any one who points at you is most likely mad because they have done it themselves.
id say that if you want to see him again meet with him for lunch 4-5 times and make sure you spred it out over the course of a month or so if he is still nice and sweet like he is now then go on a date with him but don't put out this time talk to him and tell him that you think that you might have moved to fast the first time and you want to take it easy. if hes cool with that then you can make up your mind from there
2007-11-26 05:08:54 · answer #4 · answered by teri b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he is being genuine but you never know...if you seem to like him and vice versa, the first step you should do is why not go hang out with him...if you are uncomfortable, see if you can hang out with another couple or something with you guys so you don't find yourself alone....
Don't let alcohol get in the way cause things get crazy when people are drunk and or tipsy and see how things go on a normal sober to sober situation...who knows, it may even be the start of something exciting. Good Luck.
2007-11-26 04:58:15 · answer #5 · answered by Erica F 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I guess if you see him you'll find out. He could have an ulterior motive or he could be genuine. If you hang out with him again, just say that you want to take things slow and tell him what you've said here..that you're not like that.
2007-11-26 04:58:18 · answer #6 · answered by pi3rc3d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he were really a rat, I doubt you would have heard from him again at all. Try hanging out with him in a public place and make it clear you want to get to know him a little better before going any further. Maybe he's one of the few who actually has more to him than a desire for sex. You won't know unless you give him a chance.
2007-11-26 05:00:12 · answer #7 · answered by Otter 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Thats a hard one to tell, cuz you never know if he really likes you or is just tryna get you to "come over and hang out." But in my opinion it seems like he may really like you since he talks with you for an hour over the phone and most men hate to even talk to their girlfriends on the phone for over 5 minutes!! But i would say if you really like him and would like to get to know him make plans to go out and stuff but make sure you don't get "too" close with him so you'll let him know that you don't want a relationship based on sex. But stick to this because if you just end up sleeping with him again then he may just use you for that. so let him get to know you without being physical and see how that works out. hope that helped!!
2007-11-26 05:05:05 · answer #8 · answered by CannaPriss♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's too bad you couldn't hold the liquor the first night, you wouldn't have all this doubt now...
The only thing you can do is call him, ask for a date and see what he's like..
Stay out of bed this time, and see if he comes back..
If no third time, then he just wanted in your pants...
2007-11-26 05:02:17 · answer #9 · answered by Sophie B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So what you slept with him the first night maybe he does want to "hook up" again, maybe he's the one, who knows, if you are not dating anyone seriously than why not give him a try. Forget what everyone else is saying. A lot of people miss out on their "happy ending" due negative thoughts other people try to impose on us.
2007-11-26 05:04:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋