how do parents explain autism to there children?

Question

what do parents say to there kids when they see my son ,who is autistic and non-verbal, banging his head on the cement or slapping his face followed by loud bursts of vocal noises.

Answer 1

show them my video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbgUjmeC-4o

Answer 2

If I don't know what the reason is, I tell my kids what I think the problem might be. I want them to grow up knowing there is more to life than what people see as normal.

My eldest son is verbal high functioning autistic. Maybe my view is clouded. While my son isn't as severe as yours I'm also curious to see the answers you get. I know in the past I have heard people tell their kids that I am a bad mum with no control. Then there's the comments that my son needs a good kick up the backside.

Answer 3

My daughter is only 2 1/2 and I don't recall if she has noticed another child with autism or some other noticeable difference than herself. She would probably ask me "What's that?" and I would answer a boy. She would want to know what's wrong and I would probably tell her he's not feeling well and is mad and she would say, "Don't be mad, be happy." She is very optimistic and doesn't like anyone to be sad, mad, or in pain. But that is a good question. What would you recommend we tell our children?

Answer 4

If your child is banging his head on cement or slapping his head, your last worry is what to say to other children who are observing him right? Your first concern is protecting your child from injury and helping your child calm down and be safe. In these situations, even very young children tend to understand that something is wrong. If you do see another child becoming upset, you could always say reassuringly that you are going to handle the situation and that you won't let him get hurt. People just want to know that you can handle it and if you need any help. Your child's behavior is speaking for itself and they don't expect an explanation from you. Focus on helping your child self-regulate and removing him from any stressors that are setting him off.

The best thing to say is nothing. If you need a little explanatory card to hand out to busy-bodies, you can print them from my website. I've only used mine once, but it's comforting to have on hand.

Now when your your child is exhibiting unusual behaviors in public that are not threatening to himself, physically, such as flapping or vocalizing, you have another issue. If you care to, you can cheerfully ignore the reactions of other people. Never over-react to stares. If they comment, you can use an autism information card or explain in a positive way. Or you can talk to your child normally and let people hear you and pick up on that. For example, when my child does something strange in public, I might say, Wow, you are really excited right now! You can verbalize what your child is feeling. Say it as he would if he could. Since your child is nonverbal, keep those picture cards on hand, and use sign language. People who see you using sign language and picture cards "get it" and your child will be a lot calmer in public with these supports. You don't need to address others directly, just let them catch you being accepting and loving around your child. They will get the message.

What do you do with direct questions from children? Like when they ask you "What's wrong with him? Why is he acting like that?" If they are polite questions, you can explain for your child. You can say "he is acting this way because he has autism." Or you can explain that loud noises upset him, or that he is a little different. But always focus on the positive. Be upbeat. You can even recruit the child to help. They really like this. You can say...I think he wants to say/do (blank). Do you have any ideas? Let other kids come up with creative ways if they want to interact with your child (supervised by you, of course). I remember a boy at the pool was curious about my child with autism (who flaps a lot). I gave him my disposable camera and asked if he would like to take pictures of us playing at the pool, and he played with my son with autism all day.

Answer 5

When she gets scared of him or tells me she wishes her brother wasn't different tell my 6 year old daughter that god makes each of us different and we are all loved and will all be tested. Accept people for how they are and be kind. I tell her helping those less fortunate makes us better people and that one day it may be our hand held out for help. I ask her to be patient and to try and understand that people get sick in many different ways. Our task is to ease their path.
Her younger brother has autism.

Answer 6

when i was small in preschool i remember a boy who was severly autistic...hed jump up and down and hit walls and such and if aggrivated hed hit people. i didnt know what was wrong with him so i just assumed he was mad, so i just was super nice to him and tried being his friend. later on i talked to my teacher and she told me why he did those things, said what he had and told me "he can't help it, he was born like that. but hes still a person and needs friends" so i kept being his friends until 3 grade :) than i moved :(