Does a person's personality REALLY matter more than their outward appearance?

Question

I know we all say that the personality is what really counts, and whenever someone asks a question on here about getting a date, or how they look, half the people always answer with "they go by whats on the inside". But, it just doesn't seem like that is what we really do in real life.

How much do looks mean to you? Would you date someone that you do not consider attractive (even though they are really a great person)

Also, WHAT is it (physically) that makes a person ugly?

Answer 1

Have you ever watched the show beauty and the geek. After those hot girls have spent time with the geeks they start to appreciate the guys. The Beauties kind of forget looks and they start getting along because they are normal guys. It depends on the people involved though. Some are apperance only, and some aren't.

Answer 2

In a relationship, it's not so much that looks count as that it's important to be attracted to your significant other. There's a lot that goes into being attractive. Physical appearance is one factor, but so is personality. A good sense of humor, an easy going manner and seductive charm are always going to be attractive even if a person's physical features are a little on the plain side. The psychology of attraction is complicated, as is what goes into making a person attractive.

But that's once you're in a relationship or at least know the person you want to be in a relationship with.

For someone looking for a relationship (date/fling/whatever) outward appearance is very important because that's the first thing that we see, and so it's the first thing that a person will be attracted to or repulsed by. Here, too, it's not just about physical features. Hygene, posture, self-confidence (this is a big one for both men and women), and care about what you are wearing all contribute to "outward appearance"... which means that they are all considered when someone is checking you out.

So to answer your more personal question, yes looks are important and yes I've asked people out based on their looks. I would not stay in a relationship with someone I did not consider attractive, but what makes a person attractive from across a room may not be enough to make them attractive 10 minutes into a conversation. Hopefully once you're in a relationship the qualities that attract you to the person are in fact more than skin deep, even if their more superficial qualities are what interested you in the first place.

Answer 3

Looks will catch a mate faster than personality will. For example, a good looking guy will attract a girl faster than an ok looking guy with a nice personality. The + about personality is that if the great person gets in a relationship, that relationship will last longer. The good looking guy may catch a relationship, but it might not last as long.

As long as their not ugly and they have a good personality, i'll go out with them.

I'd say being overweight, any kind of deformations, or anything that's presented as 'bad looking' is what is considered ugly. But different people have different opinions.

Hope that helps!

Answer 4

Once you get old enough to have an individual personality, and not just a "trying on different styles" personality comparable to the development of one's fashion style, then yes, personality is more important. Very few people are really attractive enough to make their money being attractive, as models and actors do, but that's the image most of us have in mind when we think about what a person should look like. Most people who do look that good are distorted in their relations with others as a result of that physical beauty, and have personalities that would never be tolerated in an ordinary-looking person.

Remember beauty is largely a function of youth, but character causes us to continue to see beauty even as one gets old.

Query: Did Katherine Hepburn REALLY stay beautiful, or was she ever what one would typically call beautiful? Or was she so very much loved because of her fascinating character, and her ability to portray a very wide variety of roles convincingly. Including beautiful women, of course.

Answer 5

Ok, here's a thought......In thirty years people will not look the same......I think that looks do matter but only in a way that is what you consider attractive. Some people may think someone is unattractive but has an awesome personality , and to someone else that person is EXTREMELY attractive. Besides, there's nothing worse than an a really cute guy opening up his mouth and revealing himself to be a complete jerk and dumba**.

Answer 6

Well...I've liked guys who are totally ugly, but are really wonderful and nice. Thats happened a few times. And then I've also liked guys who are really hot, but total dick heads. It works either way!

To me...what makes a guy ugly is arrogance, rudeness or just plain meanness.

I WOULD date someone I didn't think was attractive, but seriously liked. Definitely.

And different people have different ideas about what makes a guy ugly. It all depends on the person.

Answer 7

I wouldn't date a man I thought was ugly. That's honesty, but I would date an ok looking man! Looks aren't everything, but they do play a small role... i think you have to be able to look at someone and not be disgusted... but everyone looks at people with a different eye. People say I have bad taste... and I think others have bad taste. The most important thing is persona;ity though, because if you have that you can change minds and hearts but without it you will lose minds and hearts!

Answer 8

I think it all has to do with the media..look at all the celeberties, theyre all FAKE. People look at them and say theyre beautifull but dont realize it was the plastic surgery that had to do with it. Look at all the commercials on tv, every other commercial is about some new diet pill or beauty product you can think of. I personally think its crap. Everytime i watch tv or flip the pages of a magazine i start feeling ugly &insecure. Me as a normal (meaning not a celeb) 20 yrs old female feel that i just cant compete or keep up with what all the guys think is hott. Its pretty sad how most of the time people judge a book by its cover

Answer 9

To put it simply, we look for the best available breeding stock. Anomalies to a basic idea of what is considered a good specimen make a person either beautiful or ugly. Symmetry and proportion play a huge role in determining whether or not you find a person to be handsome, beautiful, or not.

Answer 10

Appearance is what starts a relationship and helps you meet people(generally). Personality is what keeps the relationship going and makes it grow. In the long run, personality is what keeps a relationship together, and is definately more important. But honestly, who are you more likely to start a conversation with-a super un-attractive person or a "hot" person?