I'd like some tips on how to manage my jealousy. My boyfriend has been making MORE female friends lately and I'm not totally comfortable with it. I have told him this, 'specially when I found out some of them were two or so years younger than me and he's older than me and we're both still teenagers. (Him-19, Me-17) We live together because he got kicked out and my family doesn't like letting people we know are responsible go to waste on the street.
When needed, I talk to the girls that seem to be getting too clingy. There's only been two for that though, last one freaked out on me because my boyfriend didn't tell her that we got back together after our small break and I had heard they made-out the day after we got back together. (Few days long and they didn't make-out.)
It just worries me when he has so many female friends... And I know some of you will suggest that I meet his friends but I already know that I'd rather not be around some of those girls.
2007-11-25 13:15:07 · 22 answers · asked by ling L 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have told my boyfriend before that I'm uncomfy with the amount of female friends and suggested that he make some more male friends. He knows when I don't feel comfortable with him going out with his friends and he has made one of the girls I had a conflict with him being around tone down quite a bit. I'm hoping the same thing happens with the last girl because I really did feel disrespected.
I have found reason to watch what he does from some messages I found that he told me were to see if I was snooping in his stuff. I had only snooped that once and really felt the urge towards that certain thing.
I'm probably going to have to tell him that I'm uncomfy with him being on the phone with other people while I'm asleep or after a certain time. (Like after 9 seeing as most people in my house go to bed at that time.)
His parents didn't kick him out, he moved out because his mother was acting irresponsibly, stealing his money and getting drunk.
2007-11-25 13:30:04 · update #1
He doesn't seem like a very good boyfriend. He could be a good, responsible person, but that doesn't necessarily make him a good boyfriend. If he was a good boyfriend, he'd care about your feelings. He wouldn't be roaming around with all these girls. And that thing about him making out with the other girl is a red alert. He's probably the kind of guy who can't settle for one girl. He needs many of them around just to make himself feel better. He should be so grateful to you for letting him stay in your home, but instead he's playing around.
Don't get too attached to him because you'll be left heart-broken.
2007-11-25 13:26:17 · answer #1 · answered by ♠Jay♠ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are being played honey.
This guy is looking for an excuse to mess around on you.
At 19, he is playing the field and getting to live at your house too. If you want to be with him, tell him that he has to stop meeting and hanging out with other girls. He should do it if he cares for you because you say it hurts you. If he doesn't he doesn't care for you.
Second, tell your parents a little about what is going on. Tell them that if he gets a job and pays his fair share to stay there they will let him stay.
Last, find a friend that he isn't too familiar with and have them tail him for a few days to see where he spends his spare time.
If they even suspect that he is meeting other girls no matter what age, then dump this jerk and fast. Have your parents kick him out also.
But for his defense, he may just be struggling with his feelings for you and he may want to work it out with you exclusively.
Like I said, he needs to decide if you are worth losing or if he wants to mess around with other girls.
Be strong and remember a cheat is always a cheat, is always a cheat, is always a cheat...
Don't hang your heart and hopes on someone that doesn't deserve it.
2007-11-25 21:29:02 · answer #2 · answered by halfwittcg 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well tell him that. If he wants the other females there is nothing u can do but get someone else to treat you better and show him that. Start making more male friends most times revenge is not the best way to go but maybe he will feel some of what u are feeling
2007-11-25 21:21:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This seems to be a suspicious situation if these girls are being somewhat clingy. I would not worry about being jealous and worry more about the fact that he may be taking advantage of your generousity.
I would talk to him about the fact that this makes you uncomfortable. If necessary, I would give him a timeline for finding his own place to live. There isn't anything wrong with him having female friends, but it sounds like he is crossing the line.
2007-11-25 21:24:01 · answer #4 · answered by Caroline 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If they're getting too clingy, you need to let them know. By allowing them to continue this behavior, you're letting them disrespect you and that's a no-no. If you don't want to be around those girls, your boyfriend prolli doesn't need to be either. There's nothing wrong with him having girl friends, but if there are certain ones you're not comfortable with, tell him. If there are rumors that he's been hooking up with one of them, or did hook up once or w/e, she definitely needs to go. Sometimes rumors start for no reasons, but usually they come from somewhere. She prolli hit on him. Either way, she def needs to hit the pavement
2007-11-25 21:19:09 · answer #5 · answered by kultkonn98 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would just trust him for now, if anything else goes on. Like he sneaks out or is always on the phone then i would start worrying. The thing to handle jealousy is not get to far into his business because alot of boys dont like that . IF you can deal with that make some new "boy" friends and maybe he'll quit talk to a few of them girls.
2007-11-25 21:20:54 · answer #6 · answered by cheerbabe351973 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am an extremely jealous person. My boyfriend (12+ yrs) has a great personality and gets along with most men and all women. That being said, I just remind myself every day that he is with me, he lives with me and the he is in love with me. He is only friends with these other people and if I let my jealousy get out of control then I will drive him away.
I hope this helps. Also, talking to other people in similar situations helps.
2007-11-25 21:20:19 · answer #7 · answered by creativesoapz 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds as tho you really shouldnt be around him either. Legally, you are considered a minor, and he is NOT. In addition,
if he's making out with others (whatever the circumstance) than he is definitely NOT your steady.
I would also question why his folks kicked him out. Perhaps he isnt quite as 'responsible' as your family may think.
2007-11-25 21:22:55 · answer #8 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
is he giving you a reason to be jealous? your guy will know and have female friends for the rest of his life.. like im sure you have guy friends.. you are still young.. boys will come and go.. trust me.. when i was young i had a guy .. my high school sweetheart.. and he broke my heart..( hi BJ).. lol.. anywho..i just thought that the world wouldn't rotate without this guy.. but you get older wiser and u move on.. dont let this guy drive you insane.. talk with him.. and if he is giving you a reson to be jealous then he apparently doesnt respect you.. i wish you the best of luck!
2007-11-25 21:19:52 · answer #9 · answered by martina c 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In this field it useless to be jealous my dear; you can never possess a human being; that story of say 'MY' friend, wife or husband does no more exist;you can possess a car, a house etc, but not a human being; so forget about jealously and enjoy life
2007-11-25 21:24:36 · answer #10 · answered by dayapin39 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋