How should I deal with living in the same house as a person who does absoultely everything wrong, and I get blamed for it? Who is always making comments on every aspect of everyones life except her own, who is lazy as all hell, who doesn't shower, who is a total b*tch to everyone, including her friends, and is just all around unbearable?
2007-11-25 10:31:46 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It's definately not love, it's a sibling thing, but it should be dead, I am 22 years old, and I hate it that I have such a big problem with her, and the problem with this is, that everyone else in the house is on her side because she has ADD, like that is a dam excuse.
2007-11-25 10:39:42 · update #1
Its been going on for 19 miserable years, and it's looking like I will have to let her move into my next place with me too.
2007-11-25 10:40:49 · update #2
4th answerer, thank you, but no, I am a neat freak, I make alot of money because I work hard, and I am not dumb. I am supporting her and her nasty self. I do not posses any of these traits.
2007-11-25 10:42:38 · update #3
Ok, last guy who answered, I have earned it plenty, I don't need your worthless lecture. And as for Toffy, Well, I live with my parents because they are old and sick, and yes, I do make good money, which is why I am expected to let her live with me when they go. Thanks to the people who understand without the worthless questions and millitary strategies.
2007-11-25 12:14:13 · update #4
Um. Get a second job or volunteer somewhere and get a new hobby so that you are around her less? Focus on your won life and eventually you will forget she is there? Make your own fun and stay out of her way? Eventually she will get on with it, but by keeping yourself busy and away form her there will be more important things for you to think of than just focusing on how much a loser someone else is. Really. Try keeping yourself more busy. I am serious.
2007-11-25 10:40:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO this isn't your responsibility.....Where are your Parents, or other adult family members, such as Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents. Why should you have to have her move with you, no this is not right.....She can get into programs for her problem. Her behavior is changable with the proper guidence and repeated support. She is also trainable and can get a job. I am wondering if she is diagnosed with the right problem? Truly your Parents are lacking with this issue of training her to do the normal dailythings and the hygiene Good Luck kiddo you need it to change things with your sister. Or find a way and you get out.....with out her....
edited: Why do you make such great money and can't get out on your own with out her???? Who are you living with?? You are a bit sketchy in places.....who is blaming you for her wrong doings?
edited: Well now I understand your situation fully. With elderly parents it is probably not going to change in a hurry. Let your parents know you would be more willing to be understanding of her laziness, and lack of personal hygiene if they would back you up in getting her outside behavior help. Also, they need to follow thru with setting guidelines in the home that will work for everyone. This isn't a fair situation for you at all, and that is unfortunate, and I can only commend you for your good heart in knowing you will probably be responsible for her. Dealing with this kind of a person is very difficult without any help from the rest of the household members. Outside help is a source you might look into. Also, if she has not been to a Doctor for a checkup and medicine check....that might be needed too. There could be other issues affecting her making her antagonistic with her surroundings. Just a thought.
Is it possible for you to take a break from this situation, for a getaway at a friends house for a weekend, you could use a break from this situation.....Try to work on that, put a lock on your bedroom door before you go!!
2007-11-25 18:53:28 · answer #2 · answered by Toffy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't understand, are you guys living at home with your parents? If that's the case, the problem is even deeper, you should get out of that house NOW. If not, tell her now that you can no longer live with her and you will be moving and she cannot come along with you, period. She deserves notice, but that's all. You MUST end this cycle of dependence, there is NO SUCH THING as ADD and offer zero excuse. You need to take care of yourself so that you can lead a normal life, and not tie yourself so closely with your family at the point in your life. You're not 16, you're a full adult.
2007-11-25 18:55:41 · answer #3 · answered by The Scorpion 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, ADD is no excuse not to shower. Being a *****, last time i checked doesn't go along with ADD. I hate when everyone uses excuses like that to explain things. look i have Depression, and only a handful of people know, its not like i go broadcasting it. We all have our days, we all have to live with our shortcomings. Your sister just needs to grow up. Your family needs to stop making excuses for her cuz apparently she has enough of her own. I understand ADD hell i have it most of the time. I would help her organize her life, and teach her life strategies to get things done with out the excuse of ADD. she forgets a lot i'm sure, easily distracted. Give her lists, start out small, if she gets distracted just a small reminder of the list should do. Shes unbearable cuz she doesn't have anything to do, cuz no one will give her something to do and everyone treats her like a baby. Truely the problems lies with your family and who ever allows the behavior to continue.
2007-11-25 18:47:02 · answer #4 · answered by *<3_Gizmo* 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who blames you?? You said you live in the same house but you don't own it? You're 22 years old? You make good money?? So get out of the house. Get your own house and don't live with her. There are men and women younger than you living in Iraq with diffucult tentmates. Trade places with one of them and put some things in perspective. Maybe your sister might have some respect for you if you earned it.
2007-11-25 19:03:48 · answer #5 · answered by noshaymatall 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why are you in this situation?!?!? It sounds terrible! would just keep to myself and set ground rules for her to follow- like she keep her part of the apartment clean and clean up after herself. Keep to yourself when her friends come around and ignore her behaviour. Maybe go out when you can to keep things civil and so that you can not be at eachothers' throats 24-7. Hope this helps you out, sounds completely miserable, hope it doesn't have to last too long!
2007-11-25 18:39:38 · answer #6 · answered by Kat 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she described you, would she say the same thing? A lot of times, what annoys you most in other people is the personality traits you possess.
Try being nice to her. It sounds like she doesn't like herself very much.
2007-11-25 18:40:35 · answer #7 · answered by justanotherone 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sounds like Love. haha No I'm kidding.
What you have to do is Scream at her, get your anger out. BUT make sure everyone else in the house is one your side.
Maybe she'll learn her lesson.
2007-11-25 18:37:53 · answer #8 · answered by Alexa A 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
at first i thought this was my brother, same circumstances...i would have told him to move out and get his own house, but i don't know you. just let her alone
2007-11-25 18:54:49 · answer #9 · answered by Kelsi J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋