What do some of these stay at home moms propose single mothers do?

Question

Every so often, someone asks a question about daycare- the cost of daycare or something to do with the daycare their child attends..

And, without fail, there will be several stay at home moms who chime in about "loving your child enough not to put them in daycare."

What about single moms? Of course it's not an ideal situation- but surely they can't be expected to stay at home with their children- who would feed them or pay the bills?

I work from home- 2 days out of the week, I go out and my husband stays home with the kids. I'm a photographer- I travel to my locations on these days.

Before I met my husband, I was a single mother of one. I didn't like leaving her, but I had no choice. I understand that having a parent home is nice, but I don't think many stay at home mothers realize that it's actually a luxury that not all families can afford..

Answer 1

As a former single mom I know what you are talking about. But as a working mom it was the same thing. The thing is with kids you have to make time for them no matter what. I worked full timeand went to school part time. My daughter was lucky to have grandparents near. They filled in when I was not there. I took the time to have lunch with her at school once or twice a week. I kissed her on the forehead with my bright red lipstick on so that she could see that I had kissed her even when she was a sleep. I let her and her friends come to the mall I worked at on Saturdays when I was working and they shopped and went to the food court and hung out and checked in with me ever so often. We attended and still attend church together every sunday. I busted my rear to make sure I was at all her music performances and took her to buy fancy dresses for fancy occasions and made sure she knew that she was the most important thing to me. Some stay at home moms can not even say that they do this for their kids becuase they sit the kids in front of a TV instead of a babysitter. No matter who or what you are, you have to make time to be there for your kids. That is the secret, period. Be there somehow, someway everyday. And, do not let them down!

Answer 2

It not just single mothers they flame. It's married working mothers too.

Regardless, it is NO one else's position to tell another mother how to live their lives. Some people WANT a two income household. That is there choice.

I hate when people say, "we make life work by one income, we sacrifice"

Ok, that's wonderful for YOUR situation. But, not everyone is you. Not everyone WANTS (to take the risk) of living on one income. Not everyone's financial situation allows it (especially if you have debt or students loans--you can stop paying them, but you can't hide from creditors) Also, in some areas of the country, a starter home (as in 2/3 bed, 1bath, 1200sq-NO mansions) might be $250K or 300K. That's at least $1200-$1300 not including taxs and homeowner's insurance.

Point being-VERY few people can make it on one income. So, working mothers are here to stay.

I think parents should do what works for their families. I don't think working mom are bad mothers. I think they are fabulous mothers. To each is there own.

Single mothers are simple doing the best for their kids. That's commendable. What some of these (stay at home) women don't understand is that NO one else is going to put food in your kids mouth, or clothes on their back. No one is going to pay for their doctor bills or the roof over their head.

Answer 3

Ideally and with enough money to be above the scrapeby stage, it is great for Moms to stay at home. Both my Husband and I worked full time to support our family and pay our mortgage, and pay his child support for 2 kids. We had custody of the youngest. His income would not cover it all. And his ex never did pay any of the child support due us. Did the kids suffer.....?? Not enough to make them bad, weird, or drug addicts, or thiefs, or in trouble with the law. NO. We had a strong union and strong family, and moral values we instilled in the kids. We did all the things possible we could do with the kids. They grew up with traditions in Holidays, Easter, Family gatherings, BBQ's etc. None are Doctors, or Lawyers, because we couldnt afford to send them to college even on 2 incomes. We did not give expensive gifts, because we couldnt afford that either. Yes, being a stay at home MOM is a Luxury in this day and age. Don't let ths type of venting system get to you. Remember half if not more of the stay at home Moms are probably on welfare and always pregnant with another fatherless child. Most don't want to dig themselves out of that hole. Congrats on your photography, keep it up, thick skin comes with age. And I am sure you and your family will be just fine.

Answer 4

Girl, SAHM's want everyone to drag everyone down to their level of misery. It's not for everyone. You'll see a lot of single moms on yahoo as they have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO. If they were so preoccupied with the needs of their children, they'd get their big butts off the computer and tend to them.

If I were you, I wouldn't give a baboon's butt about what some SAHM says about your predicament. Just know this: divorce rates are the same for stay at home moms as they are for anyone else and women who are educated and have stayed in the workplace fair much better that those who don't. My sister stays at home with her kids but is now going through a wretched divorce and has no idea how she will support herself. My best friend's sister was one of those loud mouthed SAHM's who slammed single and working mothers at every opportunity. Her husband left her for a working woman leaving her destitute.

Staying at home is not for everyone. And if it's so fuzzy and fabulous, why aren't men BEGGING for the position? Some people are cut out to stay at home, others aren't and more just can't. Everyone should just mind their own business

Answer 5

Hmmm wellness a stay at abode mum living in Australia, I get carry of parenting charge from the government. that is not any longer a great volume and what I get carry of is in keeping with how plenty my husband earns in his activity. All mothers here in Australia get carry of parenting charge except their or their husbands earnings are over a definite shrink. I stay at abode and have desperate to no longer return to artwork as yet because of the fact the childcare expenditures for my youngest baby are horrendous and that i might lose maximum of my salary and then i might lose a great sort of the parenting charge. Have finished my sums and financially i'm extra useful off at abode until my youngest reaches college age. My husband pays alot of tax, and with parenting charge I see it that way we are turning out to be a number of it returned. interior the recommend time i'm attempting to do a direction to earnings some works skills which may be helpful as quickly as I do return to artwork, so that is not all wasted time.

Answer 6

"If you can't feed 'em, don't breed 'em."