Future roomate help!!?

Question

So my bff's husband is getting deployed (he's in the service), she currently lives on base where he is stationed. In a few months she is moving back to town, when she does we are getting a place together. I am excited but recently heard through the mill she is trying to get pregnant before he leaves "just in case something happens to him". I don't mean to be inconsiderate or anything but I do not want to deal with a pregnant person or a baby. I mean, I am young with 2 jobs and in school trying to jump start my career; I don't think it's fair to me to make me deal with that. I have anxiety and am stressed enough as it is, with my plateful and I really don't want to hear a baby crying or have to take care of a pregnant person. I choose to never have kids for a reason. She has not discussed any of this with me about her wanting to get pregnant. Am I being a jerk or do I deserve the right to decline being her roomate if in fact she happens to be pregnant when we move in? Do I say something

My sister heard the baby news from her mom. Her mom said she was trying to convince her to wait to have a baby because a)she is way too young and b)should wait till he comes home or not. she needs the father there to help raise the child and if hes going for those crucial moments in a childs life it can be harmful. and if something does happen to her husband then its not fair to the child to be fatherless because mommy just had to have a baby. i think my friend didnt consider all aspects of this and is just being selfish. and especially selfish for not discussing this with me

Answer 1

You have the right to decide who you want to live with. Don't cause discomfort to yourself only to please somebody else. Tell her that you appreciate your peaceful place, that you'd feel stressed having babies around, and that if she may be thinking about having babies as people say, you'd be not the right roomate for her. You know Seinfeld, tell her it's you, not her, lol.
It's good that you know what you want.
Good luck !

Answer 2

You need to sit her down for a frank talk. Spell it out.
Tell her what you found out and your views on it.
Tell her you are neither a nurse, nor a babysitter. You need your quiet time to study and sleep.
If she really insists on becoming a single parent, she needs to share an apartment with someone else along those lines.

Consider looking around for another possible roomie. Perhaps the school's Student Union will have a message board for people looking for roommates. Look at it as a business arrangement.

Answer 3

No, you have every right to be concerned *if* the rumor is true. You need to tell her what you have heard and the two of you need to talk about what her real plans are. If you're not ready and willing to help her through the pregnancy and early months of the baby's life then you do need to let her know that. Not only for your sanity but hers. She needs to make plans to be with someone who can support her through this while her husband is gone.

Answer 4

if it were me i'd still let her room w/ me, i'd just try to find a place w/ thick walls. she's going to need a friend there for her to go through this situation you can be that friend. if she does get pregnant then if you really can't deal w/ it you can take nights off now and then. before you guys move in, you should prob ask her about it and then state your views to just give her a heads up. but yeah, keep in mind that it's stressful if you have no idea if your husband is going to come back or not and she is going to need someone there to help keep her spirits up.