my mom is the biggest ***** in the world no lie, she is the devil and i hate her. she is so controlling?

Question

ok so i no it sounds mean that i hate my mom but i do..no dought about it..she is so controling, she controls everything..ok to begin she got me this cell phone but everynight it has to be in her room at 10 pm to charge..when it is in her room she goes through all my messeges, i delete them when i put it in her room but the ones i get when they are in her room she reads..she tells me that since its not my phone, i dont deserve privacy, next is my life, i cant do anything or go anywhere, i am a teen and should be having fun but no i have to beg and pleed to get out..i should have my license for about 4 months now but she wont let me get it, i dont no why, my grades are good a 3.0!!! finally she tried to take my paycheak last night. i was like no and she was pissed, its my money but she told me it wasnt cuz she took the time and gas to take me, its only like 10 min away..she is the reason for my depression and i cant deal with it anymore she is the biggegst ***** ever and i want OUT NOW

Answer 1

I have a 17 year old daughter and I don't allow the cell phone in her room after 10 either (except on weekends). I would never dream of reading her messages. Your mom's behavior suggests one of two things are true - either you have given her some reason not to trust you or else she is a paranoid and controlling person. The best way to approach her is with respect and maturity...not screaming and whining. List activites and privledges you feel you deserve and ask her what you need to do to be granted these things. Be willing to compromise. Beat her to the punch on issues you know she is sensative about. For instance, if she gives you a 12 o'clock curfew surprise her and come home at 11:30. Tell her "Mom, I really appreciate your effort and expense for taking me to work and you are right for expecting to get paid for it. Until I can do it myself I would like go give you $x.xx dollars per trip." These things might be tough to do, but a little sugar goes a LONG way. Good luck and hang in there.

Answer 2

The truth of the matter is that you have the same rights whether you are 7 or 17... none. She is probably worried that you are getting into trouble. She is totally responsible for you until you are 18.

If you are working, then get your own cell phone and let her have that one. You can afford the $40 a month. Keep the new phone to yourself.

When you get your paycheck, save your money. Get a savings account if you can... most banks have passbook savings for minors. Put it away. When your mom comes in to shake you down for gas money, hand your mom what you say is "your last $20" just so she walks out with something in her hand.

If you can, either ride a bicycle or take a bus to work. See if there is someone you can ride with. Riding the bike will give you good exercise for a hot-looking figure.

When you go through the driving school, you can pay your own way, and pay for your own license.

Answer 3

Okay, first of all, how old are you? If you're under 18, and in some states 17, she can pretty much do whatever she feels like doing. That sounds cruel and screwed up, yea, but my mom was exactly the same way. And worse, I promise. As far as the texts go, let your friends know about your 10pm deadline. Maybe that will cut down on the personal texts that your mom is able to read. And what's a ballpark estimate on your paycheck? Is it from somewhere like Pizza Hut or like a receptionist job? It depends how much your check is. My mom used to take every cent from me, but that's only because I owed her money from college loans. Talk to her, try to work out some kind of payment plan if you owe her. Tell her how important being independent is to you, maybe she'll cut you a break. Good luck! Hope you get what you're after

Answer 4

She sounds strict, but loving parents have to be. You should show her that you're responsible and trustworthy, that you won't turn into the whore(excuse me) of the town that you aren't doing things you shouldn't.
Taking pride in who you are and acting like an adult, taking responsibility like an adult and brushing up on your spelling, get your grades up(3.0 will get you somewhere, but higher is always better), etc...
Besides, she's scared her little baby is all grown up and will leave her. Open communication with her and let her know you feel smothered, she might understand, let her know EXACTLY how you feel, she'll probably get angry--that's when you don't yell, you stay calm and be mature, sit through the yelling, when or if she calms down tell her "See, that's why we can't talk".
And don't leave until you're 18 at least, it would be the most ignorant thing to do when you have a home and food and family right now. If you leave now, what're you going to do, mooch off friends that'll get sick of you after a month, soon you'll lose them all and be on the street, with nothing.

Answer 5

I appreciate your desire to be scientific about this, but you need a larger variety of sources. You have read only the works of people who, for some reason, don't want you to accept evolution. Start with the Wikkipedia article on evolution, which is good, basic information. You will see that there is no such thing as "micro" and "macro" evolution. You will read about the evolution of the eye, the evolution of the horse (very well documented) and observed evolution in the present day. I also believe you should check your facts about how breeders can not produce large changes in animals. One need to look no further than the dachshund and the Afghan hound so see a huge variation. You may be interested to know that collie breeders, who were selecting only for animals with narrow heads, accidentally produced a strain of dog with no eyes. Or read up on the development of corn, which is a grass. Evolution is not limited to animal life. If your desire to be scientific is as sincere as it seems, you will enjoy reading Darwin's work, and the subsequent works of more modern day scientists. If you are as correct as you believe, you may even be the person who disproves evolution to the scientific community! Remember, the person who manages to do this will be rich and famous. Why not read widely and give it a try?

Answer 6

You said you were a teen but how old exactly?

Believe me, moving out is not going to make your life any easier.

I know what you're feeling..in fact, a lot of people probably do and have thought those exact words.
.
It is a frustrating time in a person's life. You are at that age where you want to be treated like an adult, but don't really act like one at times, and your mom could be going through a "I can't believe my baby is growing up so fast..and doesn't need me" stage.

She needs to respect your privacy but is probably worried about what is going on in your life. Maybe she figures this is the only way to do it.
Do you talk to her on a regular basis or do you shut her out?

I think you both are having issues with each other and don't know how to deal with them.

You need to sit down and tell her your feelings, and then be mature enough to listen to what she has to say...perhaps she will see that you are really wanting to work with her, and you can come to some kind of compromise on things.

Good luck. and remember that this will come back to haunt you when you are a parent some day! Then you will understand where she is coming from LOL

Answer 7

Try to understand that being a mother isn't easy either. There's a lot of **** out there, and going through your messages and keeping your phone with her during hours you should be sleeping is her way of trying to keep you okay.

You're her most important concern in life, even if you don't feel like that right now. She's scared about drugs, drinking, sex, anything that could hurt you. She can't be with you every second to protect you, so this phone thing is her way of sort of being able to watch over you. She worries. A lot. All good moms do.

The straight truth of it is, most kids, when they get money, end up spending it on things that aren't good for them (i.e. cigs/drugs/liquor/revealing clothes)...your mom doesn't give you money (even though it's something you earned) probably for the same reasons she restricts your phone...she's trying to keep you as far away from bad things as she can.

Bear in mind that there are a lot of kids out there that aren't allowed to have a cell phone OR a job, let alone being on the internet period, especially so late at night. I'm not saying knowing this is going to magically fix anything, but you should keep it in mind, and realize that maybe things aren't as bad as they could be.

You're a good kid, and you'll cool down soon. Remember, it's okay to be angry, but throwing around the H-word can break things you can't fix when the dust settles. Be gentle with her...just cause she's an adult doesn't mean she doesn't hurt and cry and worry, same as you.

Love to you kiddo, I hope it all works out.

-LD

Answer 8

umm,well, do you have a friend or relative that you could go stay with ?? It sounds like you just need to be away from her for awhile.
I think the best thing is to tell her exactly how you feel.
I wouldnt give her my paycheck,,if she is that upset about gas,since its only 10 minutes to work, you could walk or give her $8 a week towards the gas...as far as the cell phone, why does it need to be in her room ?
keep it with you in your room - if she gets pissed, she gets pissed, doesnt sound like it would be anything new for her.
go after your liscense - if she wont take you ,ask someone else to take you. A friend, a co worker, a relative...your working and you can pay for it, so there is no reason why you shouldnt go get it if you want it.
You didnt tell us how old you are, so that about the best advice I can give you - if your 16 or older, get your loscense and leave if its that bad

Answer 9

its good that yor talking about your problems but lets start with the phone thing maybe to get her off your back pay her a little every month and maybe she'll let you keep it in your room at all times and the going out with your friends is a little ridiculous it is true your a teen ager and you deserve to have fun im also a teen ager so i know where your coming from and use this liscense thing to your advantage, say you wouldnt have to drive me to my job if i had a license and that would eliminate the pay check problem and the license problem and last but not least be assertive yet respectful too her when disscussing this because she will treat you like an equal and not like a child. if you do yell and demand or whine she will treat you like a child and it might make the whole situation worse.

Answer 10

I'm not sure what the question here is.. but my mom is the exact same way. I'm not even kidding a little bit here. Some moms are just like that, its the way they are. And if your depressed from it, then maybe you should sit down and talk with her. It took me a long time to actually talk to my mom about it, but really you should tell her the things you typed up there. If she doesn't compromise, then there might be nothing you can do about it. You could always try and find out why she's so controlling. It might not even be her fault, because maybe when she was younger she was taught to be that way by her parents. The best thing to do is talk with her, I hope this helps you.