I need help with my annoying sister!!?

Question

ok, i had a huge fight with my mom because of my sister's big mouth!
now i don't talk to my mother and my sister wants to pick a fight with me, she's the most annoying thing to live because she's really immature, she's 22 but acts like a 9 year old!
she's always temping me to say something to her to get in more trouble.
I have to see her face every night because we share our bedroom(yes a 22 yrold woman living with her parents and sleeping in the same room as her 17 yr old sister!!!)
so what i need is help calming myself down so i won't pick a fight with her.
what can i do not to fall on her stupid game???

Answer 1

Sorry to hear about the difficulties you are experiencing, Andrea. I grew up in a family with 10 brothers and sisters, so I know very well how these things can happen, and I can easily imagine how difficult this is for you especially.

The first thing to remember is this: Your sister can "pick" fights all she wants, but you and you alone have the power to deny her what she is trying to do. I am not saying this is easy to do. It takes a lot of concentration to keep yourself calm and a lot of strength to keep telling yourself that you will not give her what she wants. You don't need to tell her you won't engage her; just don't do it. Take deep breaths to calm yourself...seriously. Literally...take deep breaths. They have an amazing ability to calm. If it becomes too difficult to manage, there is no shame in simply walking away.

The other thing to keep in mind is that no matter what she says, she cannot make you say or do anything you yourself do not agree to say or do. Remind yourself that you are in control of what you think, and more importantly of what you say. This simple fact gives you significant power to control the situation. And once your sister realizes she is not able to get you to do what she wants, her power to control the situation is gone.

If you say anything to your sister when she is trying to egg you on, say this: "Sis...You know I love you, but it's really difficult for me to enjoy being around you when you are like this. Let's talk when we're both in a better mood."

As for talking again with your mom, I believe this will come in time. If you have not had a conversation with her about the difficulties the situation with your sister creates for you, you may want to bring it up to her at a time when your sister is not around. Raise the issue gently and in a non-accusatory manner. Introduce the topic with something like, "Mom, I know you try real hard to keep the peace here, but this is really hard for me, and I hope you and I can talk about this because I believe it would help all of us."

Tell her what it feels like for YOU, not what you believe SHE may be doing that is not helpful. By not being accusatory, your mother may be better prepared to listen to what you have to say.

I hope this is helpful. I wish you well.

Answer 2

The only thing you have control over is yourself. If you are the one picking the fights, you have the power to stop it.

You know she is all about playing these stupid games, so your goal is to NOT spend any time there if you can avoid it at all.
Study at a friend's house, get a part-time job, get into some extracurricular activities... so you will have legitimate excuses to stay away. You just have to make sure you keep your grades up, do your chores and stay out of trouble.

When she is into nit-picking mode, you need to either give her the most inocuous, vapid and meaningless answers you can think of, or you need to just leave and take a little walk.
Learn how to PLAY your idiot sister.

At 22, your sister needs to either be working or at college... or BOTH. She should have a bachelor's degree soon. Your parents need to draw the line on how long she is to stay there. They are the only ones who can give her the motivation to launch.

Answer 3

Usually folks which can be disturbing to others is can also be supposed each methods. Are you disturbing to her from time to time? Is there a gigantic change in age? Is she your simplest sister? Whatever your reply, she is blood and household and also you will have to attempt to uncover the well in her verses what annoys you. Be grateful you will have a sister whilst there are others who've misplaced one.

Answer 4

There are many solutions but the thing that I think will help you the most is to keep a blog or a diary. Once you write/type it out you'll feel so much better. Although so no one gets hurt erase, shred, or delete what you wrote. Also try to keep yourself busy with fun activities and friends. Hope this helps : )

Answer 5

Imagine yourself as a secret agent who needs to gain the trust and cooperation of the enemy agent. You can't fight with her because that would ruin your ability to get information from her or to influence her to do what you want. Pretend to be her friend. Pretend you are on her side. Then you can manipulate her into cooperating with your plan.

Answer 6

ignore her by walking around with your sony walkman or ipod stuck in your ears and tune it up really loud so you can drown her out! hopefully she ll get the hint!

Answer 7

Did you ever stop to think that your sister must be terribly unhappy and she is taking her unhappiness out on you?

Answer 8

so thats why you needed those bad words on another language...loool just kidding..
i need help with my annoying brother!(but he is 12 so...i got used to it.) just ignore her and behave mature so she would feel stupid...good luck..

Answer 9

I think you should ignore her ,maybe with time she got tired if you don't give any answer to her instigation

Answer 10

ignore it,,just ignore and hang wi th your friends and aviod her