My Mom recently told me that my Aunt who is 71, used to hit and beat her 3 sons when they were children, throwing them against walls-pulling their hair,, she said her husband beat them as well with a belt.
My Mom also told me she kept a lock of the refridgerator so they coudlnt eat when they wanted, only when she opened the lock.
My Aunt has always verbally abused me, put me down, i never understood why..she recently cut my Mom off for going to Rome for Christmas instead of spending it at her house. so my Mom is explaining to me why shes a control freak, but my Mom said in her generation it was normal and common for parents to beat their kids up, is this true?
She also told me she encouraged my Mom to beat me up as a child, my Mom confessed to the only time she ever hit me as a direct influence by my Aunt.
2007-11-24 13:58:21 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Your aunt is psychotic. No, it's not normal to "beat" your children and pull their hair. She's a loon.
2007-11-24 16:34:23 · answer #1 · answered by Libra lass 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok, first the person who's talking about the 70's and 80's being ancient history is obviously a little kid who doesn't know a thing.
No, it has never been normal to beat children.
Yes, through out time, people have been hitting other people, and yes they have been going to jail for it. Spanking or not spanking was as much an issue 40 years ago as it is today. Discipline was obviously meted out more frequently in the past I would say since YA! users can attest to the lack of self control most teens seem to have these days, but there is a difference between being beaten and being disciplined.
What you are describing is child abuse, and though people 50 years ago were a little less open about their home lives, it was still illegal, and Auntie could have spent her Christmas' in lockup.
2007-11-24 15:16:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
It's definitely not normal to abuse children. What your aunt did was not acceptable, that was downright nasty and highly abusive.
Abuse is never normal nor is it "common", not in loving and nurturing homes, regardless of the generation. I'm very sorry that your Mom experienced such hate.
Had you said that she was only spanked, that would be a different story. However, this wasn't at all anything like that. Beating, physical/verbal abuse... is wrong.
Tamara stated that this was typical of the 70's and 80's. Um, I have to wonder how old Tamara is. I was born in the late 60's. The sort of abuse your aunt put upon your Mom is NOT typical of the 70's and 80's. What your aunt did was NOT normal by ANY means in ANY time.
2007-11-24 15:39:24 · answer #3 · answered by AV 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Spanking was definitely more common in the past. But it's never really been "normal" to beat and abuse your kids. However, prior to the 1970s, there was no such thing as Child Protective Services and what went on in other people's homes was often kept hush hush and was seen as no one else's business. So, most people didn't necessarily think it was "right" to beat your kids and didn't beat up their own kids, but at the same time, if they saw or knew of a child being abused, they would have been less likely to intervene or call the police than they would be today. Because again, there weren't really organizations to protect children, and it was so taboo to "stick your nose" into someone else's home life. So this is why child abuse seemed to be more prevalent in the past. There are definitely still sick people who beat their kids today, but now they are more likely to have their kids taken away and be prosecuted.
2014-10-10 06:49:01 · answer #4 · answered by *HM* 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO that is not normal!
Your aunt especially sounds like a freak, I'm sorry to say that.
But seriously... throwing children against walls, verbally abusing you, and more?
That is not okay.
It might have been normal during her time, depending on her background and how she was raised. It may have been normal in her generation but... even then I bet some people thought it was wrong.
I am so sorry that those children had to go through that!
2007-11-24 15:55:34 · answer #5 · answered by Aiyana 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
My mother is a lot older than your aunt, and we never got such treatment. Spankings yes, but throwing against walls, pulling hair, locking the fridge? Maybe it makes your mother feel less bad about your aunt to think that it was normal behavior, but that treatment would have been a scandal in my little part of the world.
2007-11-24 15:15:11 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
hit and beating a child is against the law in the US and many other countries. the correct term would be spanking. however, the way your aunt and her husband punished her children is child abuse. also, your aunt has not authority over your mother to take her money to spend on herself. if i was in your situation, i would contact the police and help your cousin's lives by sending their parents to jail. this is strictly against the law. and you are in no obligation not to notify the police. also, your mother should never just stand there when someone takes her money away to spend on their own expense. that's the same as stealing also against the law.
anyways, throwing them against the wall, pulling their hair, hitting them with a belt? if you were the one suffering, wouldn't you want to just die? do your cousins a favor. and btw, your aunt broke the law. what her and her husband is doing is morally wrong. anyways, good luck :]
2007-11-24 14:38:37 · answer #7 · answered by yejin 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Every child in my family has been spanked, but no one had ever been "beaten." No one ever got thrown up against walls, punched in the face, or even punched period.
We didn't get spanked because we wouldn't put our toys away or anything small like that... But, if we did something that was really bad, we'd get spanked. Spanking was hardly ever needed though. Most times we got something we cared about taken away.
There's a huge difference between what my mom did and what your aunt did. That there was abuse... I never went through that. I never hated my mom... And I turned out fine. I'm spanking my kids, that's for sure. Spare the rod, spoil the child.
2007-11-24 15:13:57 · answer #8 · answered by ♥Ello♥Vee♥E♥ says Shut Up, Take Notes 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
God thats horrendous! Your great aunt is not normal! No you should never beat your own children - not allow them to eat when they are hungry! But your mum was probably very much under her influence - Hope you have a great relationship now!
2007-11-24 23:29:23 · answer #9 · answered by Janie B 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your mom and grand-mom, both sound like real bitchy witches.
I think it's alright to discipline an unruly child, by simply spanking their behinds with ones hands or a thin paddle; but nothing else that might actually physically harm them. It is by the way, illegal to "beat' children; you can be put in jail for that.
2007-11-24 15:43:39 · answer #10 · answered by Alberich 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I was abused as a child. I attempted suicide at the age of 14 because I couldn't handle the verbal and physical abuse. So to answer your question, It's not OK now and I don't think it ever was.
2007-11-24 19:11:24 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋