are these stupid questions?

Question

Stupid Questions

As far as stupid questions go, these are the stupidest...

1. Why does your gynecologist leave the room when you undress?

2. If a person owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way down to the center of the earth?

3. Why can't woman put their mascara on with their mouth closed?

4. Why is it called alcoholics anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say
"hi, my name's Bob. I'm an alcoholic"?

5. If you mated a Bulldog with a Shitsu would you get a ********?

6. Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?

7. Why is there a light in the fridge but not in the freezer?

8. Why does mineral water that has trickled through mountains for centuries
have a use by date?

9. Why do toasters always have a setting on them which burns your toast to a
horrible crisp no one would eat?

10. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say "I think i'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

11. What do people in China call their good plates?

12. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

13. Why does Goofy stand on two legs when Pluto remains on four? They're both dogs.

14. What do you call male ballerinas?

15. Can blind people see their dreams and do they dream?

16. If Wile E coyote has enough money to by all that Acme crap why doesn't he buy his dinner?

17. Why is a person who handles money called a broker?

18. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

19. If corn oil is made from corn and vegetable oil is made from vegetables. What is baby oil made from?

20. If a man is walking in a forest and no women is there to hear him is he still wrong?

21. Why is it that when someone tells you that there's billions of stars in the universe,
you believe them. But if they tell you there's wet paint somewhere you have to touch it?

22. Why do you call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere, yet call it hemorrhoid when its in your ***?

23. Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

Answer 1

1. Why does your gynecologist leave the room when you undress?

It is a failed attempt at politeness ... he only wants to see your vagina, not your breasts.

2. If a person owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way down to the center of the earth?

Yep, all the way down to the molten magma ... :)

3. Why can't woman put their mascara on with their mouth closed?

Concentration decides that the mouth has to be open for perfect accuracy.

4. Why is it called alcoholics anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say "hi, my name's Bob. I'm an alcoholic"?

It is a secret attempt to get people to go because they think it will never be told to anyone ... that is, outside the building.

5. If you mated a Bulldog with a Shitsu would you get a ********?

Yes, it would be ******** because it is a horrible mix.

6. Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?

It is a secret plot to take over the world as we know ... :)

7. Why is there a light in the fridge but not in the freezer?

They figured it would be an ingenius idea for a person to have to open the fridge door to see in the freezer ...

8. Why does mineral water that has trickled through mountains for centuries have a use by date?

Because once they pull it from the mountain it loses its magic.

9. Why do toasters always have a setting on them which burns your toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?

This was just a joke from the inventors to find a way to waste bread ...

10. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say "I think i'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

I think his name was Abadiah Milker .... one day he was lost in the woods with his pet cow and couldn't find his way back, so the next thing you know he was looking for some forplay and instead of copping a feel, he got milk ... lol

11. What do people in China call their good plates?

US Plates ... Honey, let's bring out the good US plates tonight for company! :)

12. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

He was a genius, not a mechanic or architect .... even though his IQ was supposedly 186 ...

13. Why does Goofy stand on two legs when Pluto remains on four? They're both dogs.

Actually, Goofy is a Man-Dog .... which is different from an actual dog.

14. What do you call male ballerinas?

A Ballerino

15. Can blind people see their dreams and do they dream?

Yes, they do dream and it is in color ...

16. If Wile E coyote has enough money to by all that Acme crap why doesn't he buy his dinner?

Animal instincts take over the intellect ... besides that, it wouldn't be a funny cartoon if he called Dominos now would it....

17. Why is a person who handles money called a broker?

Because when he takes a person's money and invests it in the wrong stock the person is broke -r .... lol

18. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

Test -ical ... :)

19. If corn oil is made from corn and vegetable oil is made from vegetables. What is baby oil made from?

That information is Top Secret and if found out the very fabrics of our reality would split in two making our universe go out with a very Big Bang ...

20. If a man is walking in a forest and no women is there to hear him is he still wrong?

Funny thing about that .... the squirrels would still stone him to death with acorns because he wouldn't admit he is wrong ...

21. Why is it that when someone tells you that there's billions of stars in the universe, you believe them. But if they tell you there's wet paint somewhere you have to touch it?

We believe them because we are taught to do so at a very young age ... besides that, we touch wet paint because we have an unresolved issue with fingerpainting that was never solved when we were in kindergarten ... yes, it was that fun.

22. Why do you call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere, yet call it hemorrhoid when its in your ***?

Would you really like an asteroid on your *** and then have a hemorrhoid floating in outer space all willy nilly?

23. Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

It is rude to blow in a dog's face and he or she will certainly let you know it is bad conduct ....

Answer 2

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Answer 3

You can find out more about natural hemorrhoids cure here http://curehemorrhoid.info
Diarrhea can contribute to hemorrhoid formation because the bowel undergoes pressure strains due to the condition. Undue pressure on the veins that make up internal hemorrhoidal structures can worsen existing damage. Internal hemorrhoids are not visible, unless they proplapse (protrude) from the anus, either constantly or during a bowel movement. If this is the case, then you have a grade III or IV internal hemorrhoid. If the protrusion is on the anal verge or the area surrounding the anus, then its likely an external hemorrhoid. Reducing pressure from issues of diarrhea and constipation will help. Not straining during a bowel movement, not lifting heavy objects, not sitting for extended periods, all will help.

An external hemorrhoid is simply a vein located at the anal verge, the wall of which as weakened and protruded. Don't push on it, this will only increase pressure and worsen it. The body has to repair the vein wall and rebuild the integrity. This takes time, perhaps weeks, if all goes well. Use sitz baths and over-the-counter medications such as pads or creams to provide symptom relief in the interim. These won't solve the issue long term, but will give the tissue a better chance at self-healing.

Internal hemorrhoids are a different matter and require more intervention. Your best bet is to educate yourself about the condition, its causes and what options there are to treat it both short and long term. Don't ignore it though, hemorrhoids tend to become chronic in nature, lasting years or decades in some cases.

Answer 4

Hemorrhoids can result in a huge amount of discomfort, throb, irritation and scratching. In case you are suffering of hemorroids and you need discard them, this is surely the best approach to discard hemorrhoids : http://treathemorrhoid.kyma.info I always had stoppage or hard stools. At times i would even have torment when im resting and it would simply come on all the sudden. I figure it was a result of the nerves in that area or the body. I am normally very doubtful yet the ache was path worst than the cash it would cost to see whether it worked or not. So i tried it and it says it cure most individuals withing 48 hours session it didn't cure me that quick. In case its straining that is the problem then you need to get some more fiber in your consuming technique, notwithstanding no short of what 8 glasses of water of the day. In case its irritation then use simply sensitive tissue and add aloe to calm the area down. There are furthermore certain nourishments that can offer support. Trust me take after this technique: http://treathemorrhoid.kyma.info It unquestionably tackled my hemorrhoids problem .If you take after this procedure for a couple of days you will see that your problem will vanish.

Answer 5

This is the best method to get rid of hemorrhoids : http://www.goobypls.com/r/rd.asp?gid=412

I discovered it after years of pain...I was too shy for asking help to a doctor for my hemorrhoids problem...and surely I wanted to avoid surgery!

This method helped me a lot! Now I don't have hemorroids anymore and I fell definitely better...no more irritation no more pain no more bleeding hemorrhoids. I suggest you to try it if you are suffering of hemorrhoids. This method is very fast and quickly you can get rid of hemorrhoids once for all and solve this problem for ever. I know how you feel...I was feeling very bad becouse i didn't what to do, but trust me with that method you can quickly get relief and start feeling good. In the end hemorrhoids are just engorged venis and there is a solution fo this problem.

This http://www.goobypls.com/r/rd.asp?gid=412 is based on years of medical researches and allows you to solve your hemorrhoid problem in just days! I really hope it helps :)

Answer 6

The professor was a moron... and a man is only right if he keeps his opinions to himself. Wile E. Coyote wasn't smart enough to make the Acme inventions work, so why would he be smart enough to think to order a delivery pizza? And I have often wondered who first thought to grab a cow down there, and see what came out when he jerked on it...

Personally, baby... I think you need to post the "Don't Look Down!" joke... these guys would ALL get a kick out of that one! :-)

Answer 7

You can often relieve the mild pain, swelling and inflammation of hemorrhoids with home treatments. Often these are the only treatments needed https://tr.im/xLZBJ

With these treatments, hemorrhoid symptoms often go away within a week. See your doctor if you don't get relief in a week, or sooner if you have severe pain or bleeding.

Answer 8

LOL.very stupid very very.it make me laugh out loud

Answer 9

Why don't they call people from Paris Parisites?
Why do I have to click start to turn this thing off?

Answer 10

thnx 4 laughs