Decline being in Christmas Gift Exchange or End it all together?

Question

Hate in-laws gift exchange. I feel that I go with something nice and bring their re-gifted crap home. Last year they wanted to bump up the price because they said they can't find anything good for $30. I said no way. I am not doing the gift exchange. My brother and sister in law seriously must go to garage sales or shop on clearance racks for a $15 gift and pass it off as $30. You can tell because the boxes look like they have been on the shelf for 20 years. I have gone along with the exchange because it's my husbands family and don't feel it's my place to change traditions. However I'm seriously sick of spending money to get a crappy gift in exchange which no though was put into. How can I not participate when there is only 6 people at this event. I also don't want to suggest drawing names because before when we shopped individually for people I would put much though in the gift to receive bath products from these people that they must have received from a student 15 yrs ago

Answer 1

Find someting at the dollar store and start some passing of your own! (my luck would be, to draw the one cool person of the bunch and it would backfire on me)

Actually my serious answer is continue to do the right thing because as you say it is your husbands family not yours. Not your place to make a statement.

Answer 2

Surely you can figure out a way to come up with equally disgusting crap to exchange. Go to Dollar Stores and deep discount stores such as Fred's, Big Lots, Sam's Club, T J Maxx, etc. and shop for clearance stuff. If that's what you are getting, they shouldn't be disappointed to receive the same in return. If you really want to get the point across, save something you got from them the year before and wrap that back up. Perhaps if someone else starts experiencing it the way you have been, they may speak up about ending it.

Or, you could "rise above" the whole thing, and continue giving something nice. Though this would be the real "spirit of Christmas" thing to do, I realize that it is very tough to keep doing that year after year one-sidedly.

You are right, it is up to your husband to speak up and try to change the tradition on this side of the family. Perhaps if he spoke to his parents and said you guys really couldn't afford it this year (but you'd have to make that believable by scaling back in other area), or if he suggested a change in tradition, such as the drawing names thing or White Elephant/gag gift gift exchange.

I always hated these kind of things, too--whether they were at the workplace or among extended family. I feel your pain!

Answer 3

Sounds like you're just going to have to deal with it. Shop the clearance racks and tables if you're so concerned about getting a crappy gift. That way you can give and get a crappy gift.

Answer 4

So, if what they get you bothers you so much, why don't you just get them the same sort of thing in return? Don't waste a lot of time and thought on the gifts. Or turn that whole side of the family over to your husband. It's not worth getting so upset over, nor is it worth a rift in the family.

Answer 5

Why don't you save what you get from them, then re-gift it back next year or the year after? Maybe they'll get the hint.

Answer 6

i understand how you feel...but you must remember the reason for the season its not about what we get BUT what we GIVE....

try not to let it bother you this is your husbands family so deal with it....BTW what does your husband say about all this...he must have an opinion....

Answer 7

Opt out. That's the best thing to do.

Answer 8

say you don't wish to do it you won't give and you won't receive no prob