please read & honestly answer?

Question

me and this guy met on a cruise. we had sex twice, and acted like bf and gf. after the cruise he contacted me right away on myspace.
we didnt talk constantly..but after awhile he wasnt contacting me and i got nervous. i wrote him a message on myspace basically
saying that if he doesnt write back, he doesnt want any part of me..and he wrote back. i surprised visited him a few months after
the cruise, and he was really happy. he kissed me on the lips goodbye, we were only there for about 20 minutes. it was weird bc
i already decided i was going to college near where he lives in a year before the cruise. between the cruise and college we saw
eachother twice, once the surprise visit, and the other time we hung out and talked the entire time..NO SEX. we had a convo
about whether or not he was using me on the cruise or not. he said no he didnt and that he liked me. after that visit, he texted
me right after saying "thanks for coming..cant wait to see you again"..i told him i was glad that we got to talk and he said "i would
never use you" later on i said i was going to bed and i told him to have fun and he said "all my fun left at 12"...which is when i
left. two days later he texts me and were talking about him coming to ny to visit me and we could go to the city..and he said
"way rather see you then the city"..we didnt always talk constantly, but every now and then we did..so basically we were
keeping in touch. the third time we were supposed to hang out , he messed up plans...and i was down near where he lived and
staying at a hotel. he called me and got a cab and told me he was coming to see me..and it doesnt matter how much it costs
he just wanted to see me..but i told him he messed up plans in the first place, and it was too late so there was no point in coming.
5 days later, he mustered up the confidence to call me and apologize for when he messed up plans. he told me to tell him the
next time i was coming down, and he said "lets keep this long distance relationship going"..but we werent in an ldr. this past
august, i came to college near where he lives, a whole year since the cruise. we had kept in contact for one year..and now were 15
minutes away. weve hung out 6 times since ive been here. the first time he just stopped by with his friend and his friend said
that the guy i like wanted to see his girl..meaning me. we didnt have sex, we just talked. he texted me after the visit and said
it was nice seeing u tonight. i told him i was sorry he didnt stay longer and he said he would have loved to, but he didnt want
my suitemates to hate him for being there so late when we have classes the next day. and he said "just wanted to see you." the
second time he came to visit he came to lay with me. we layed together and talked the whole time, and then did stuff, but NO SEX.
i asked him why things happen sexually between us and he said because i like you and you like me. and i said as more than a friend?
and he was like..yeah i like you as more than a friend. and i said..so u didnt come here for sex..and he said..i didnt even bring a condom
so i didnt even have intentions..and we didnt have sex. he then left and gave me a huge hug and a kiss on the lips, and he was a little
offended because he said "why do you have to make me out to be such an asshole."..but he wasnt mad at me, just a little upset.
the next time we hung out we just layed and talked with eachother..NO SEX. i went over there, and it took me awhile to get there
and he called me 4 TIMES..to make sure i wasnt lying to him..and was really coming. he even offered to pay for my cab, and drove me home the next day
and then the 4th time we layed together and talked again..NO SEX. the 5th time we hung out..we actually did have sex..and
he asked me if i was alright..and if it felt good, and we climaxed at the same time. it was really intimate. the 6th time we hung out
he got high, drank, and popped pills. he wasnt himself..he was still sweet to me but he was avoiding me. i asked him what was going
on and he said he wasnt mad at me. and i said..well why are you avoiding me..and he said i wasnt. i said..listen do you like me
and he said..of course i do..its obvious i do. and he said..i just dont want a gf right now..and i think you ask a lot of questions.
i was like..i know i do..except when youre acting weird..i have a reason to act. so i was like well do u like me as more than a friend
and he was confused. i said well why did we have sex the other night..and he was like idk. he was so confused and so out of it.
so he leaves and i get a text from his friend pretending to be the guy i like saying..i had to leave cause i think youre friend is hott.
i called..and the friend answered and was like..we just hooked up..i want your friend. and they came back and the guy i like was
like i didnt say any of that..that wasnt me. so the guy i like was like lets talk in the kitchen..and the friend follows us? and the friend
got involved and pulled me aside and was like..listen he told me the gist..youre friends..he likes hanging out with you..but he
doesnt want a relationship..u hooked up on the cruise what did u think it was ? and i said..how dare you..you dont even know
the story..we didnt just hook up on the cruise. and he was like well idk. so they leave again and the friend calls me saying..the guy
you like is ****** up..call him when hes sober so you can talk..so i was like whatever. then later i get a text from the guy i likes
phone and his friend is texting me saying..the guy you like is passed out..but he likes your friend..can she hang right now? im awake..
and hes telling me yes the guy u like likes ur friend..send the digits over but dont tell him i was on his phone. i was thinking..if the
guy i like wants my friends number..why would he be mad that you were on his phone...wouldnt you just be doing him a favor?

ps. the guy i like was in a 5 year relationship with a girl who cheated on him and got pregnant with another guys kid.
his friends influence him a lot..and when we were hanging out this last hang out he was talking about how he knows a lot of pocketbook
brands bc he would buy them for his ex gf..and he "knows how girls are"..and i think that triggered the way he was acting weird.

and his myspace song is look after you by the fray and his title says "any reason why you would want to date me"
and we havent spoken in 4 weeks..and now his song is i dont wanna be in love. and now his title says " this way is a waterslide away from you"
and now i think hes back with his ex girlfriend. but the other night i saw him and he had the biggest smile on his face. i saw him with
my friends..and we were sitting at a table..and it took him awhile to come over, but he came over and sat and talked to us. his hands
were shaking..and he was so sweet and friendly. but then his friend, the stupid one..came and he had nothing to say. he had this guilty face
on and he only waved to me. then the guy i like left with his stupid friend..and they were meeting up with another friend..and he said he
was gonna come back like 10 times, but he never did. i didnt expect him to cause i felt he was either scared, or easily influenced by
his friends, and they were prob like why would you go back. and now his default pic on myspace is of me and his brothers and he did
artwork on it as a joke. AND NOW I FOUND OUT..THE GUY I LIKE'S FRIEND..LIKES ME.


1. does he like me and have feelings for me?
2. is he using me?
3. was i just a hookup?
4. what does his myspace title and songs mean?
5. did i pressure him or push him away?
6. will he ever talk to me again or want to see me?
7. do you think hes still in love with his ex gf?
8. why hasnt he been contacting me?
9. why is he hooking up with some girl right now?
10. do you think hell stop liking me, and his feelings will just randomly stop for me?
11. would he honestly hold onto me for over a year to have sex once and thats it?
12. do you think he'll come back around and we'll eventually go out?
13. if he's back with his ex girlfriend what does this mean? does he not like me? why would he do this?

Answer 1

You have invested far more time and effort than this guy is worth.

Move on.

Answer 2

Sounds like to me that after you both had intercourse matters went fallacious. He sounds very insecure. He wishes his pal to hold his hand, can not get up for himself. Additionally ingesting and popping pills. Like his friend said he is m.E.S.S.E.D up. Sounds like you like him very a lot, and i'm sure he do not have long gone through same amount of situation to look you if he did not such as you. Suppose it will had been wiser for you both to have gotten to know each different higher first earlier than getting so emeoyionally concerned, or rather sexually worried and your bond might were made greater. But if he is as you say back together with his lady friend, then quite it should be up to him, to contact you. Announcing that in case you are invited over and you still like him, which you do, you would go see him. Understandably, you surely do not seem to like his buddy. However without doubt his friend is a tremendous have an effect on in his existence. Nonetheless it is up to he, the character you like to answer your question, and possibly wiser to only maintain it between the each of you. If posible. 1/3 events have by and large been the ruine of many a just right relationship. However although you do get again so as to speak with the character you like, it is going to continue to purpose you some stress. In view that he appears to be frightened of being fully honest with you. One moment he sounds optimistic, the next kind of a entire break. Try finding a new curiosity. I don't imply exit with any person else. Except of path you in finding anyone who makes you happier. I imply something like a new pastime, to present your intellect and feelings a wreck for a at the same time. On my Yahoo 360 page are some matters you might to find of interest. Easy reading something. Wishing you peace, and completely happy Christmas and a joyful new 12 months!

Answer 3

Sounds like to me that after you both had sex things went wrong.

He sounds very insecure. He needs his friend to hold his hand, can't stand up for himself. Also drinking and popping pills. Like his friend said he is m.e.s.s.e.d up.

Sounds like you like him very much, and I am sure he would not have gone through same amount of trouble to see you if he did not like you.

Think it may have been wiser for you both to have gotten to know each other better first before getting so emeoyionally involved, or rather sexually involved and your bond might have been made stronger.

But if he is as you say back with his girlfriend, then really it should be up to him, to contact you. Saying that if you are invited over and you still like him, which you do, you could go see him.

Understandably, you certainly do not seem to like his friend. But obviously his friend is a big influence in his life.

Still it is up to he, the person you like to answer your question, and maybe wiser to only keep it between the both of you. If posible.

Third parties have often been the ruine of many a good relationship.

But even if you do get back so to speak with the person you like, it may continue to cause you some stress. Because he seems to be afraid of being totally honest with you.

One moment he sounds confident, the next more or less a complete wreck.

Try finding a new interest. I do not mean go out with someone else. Unless of course you find someone who makes you happier. I mean something like a new hobby, to give your mind and emotions a break for a while.

On my Yahoo 360 page are some things you might find of interest.

Easy reading whatever.

Wishing you peace, and happy Christmas and a happy new year!

Answer 4

wow messed up situation huh.

1. does he like me and have feelings for me? Yes he does
2. is he using me? No, but he may not be ready for the feelings he has for you.
3. was i just a hookup? I dont think so
4. what does his myspace title and songs mean? he's trying to send you a message about his feelings.
5. did i pressure him or push him away? pressured, he's still on edge from the cheating ex.
6. will he ever talk to me again or want to see me? Probably, but you should give him time.
7. do you think hes still in love with his ex gf? I think he hasn't completely gotten over the hurt, but I doubt he's still in love with her.
8. why hasnt he been contacting me?He feels guilty
9. why is he hooking up with some girl right now? trying to seperate himself from the feelings he has for you. Random hook ups to distract is common
10. do you think hell stop liking me, and his feelings will just randomly stop for me? I think that you should email him, or leave him a voicemail (some method the friend can't corrupt) let him know how you feel, and that you just want to start over and date.

The friend obviously used his 'friendship status' to manipulate your guy's feelings toward you. He figured if he could get his friend out of his way he could have a chance with you.

I wouldn't ever hook up with him ( the friend) though... the you hooked up on cruise what did you think tells me he's a user.

You should tell your guy that you think his friend pushed you two apart to get to you.
11. would he honestly hold onto me for over a year to have sex once and thats it?
12. do you think he'll come back around and we'll eventually go out?
13. if he's back with his ex girlfriend what does this mean? does he not like me? why would he do this?

Answer 5

Such drama needs to be answered with the respect and care.
1.)He has no feelings for you.
2.)He is using you like a dirty wash cloth
3.)You were more than a hook up. You were just a woman who would satisfy his own gratification.
4.) idk
5.) You did neither. He did not see you as a woman, with feelings. You were nothing to him.
6.) You have been misled in the worst ways. You don't want to see him again.
7.) He was always in love with his ex gf.
8.)He is thinking that there are alot of women like all around, that is why he has not bothered to contact you.
9.)Because he is self centered and has no regaurd for women or their feelings. The poor excuse of a man has no heart.
10.)To be honest with you, he has no feelings for anybody, but for himself.
11.)YES.......end of story
12.)After the way he treated you...and after you know the truth
do you really want to go out with him. That is what he wants.
13.) That means that he always loved her in the first place. He only likes your body and that is the TRUTH ! !
He would do this because he is only thinking of himself and that is the honest to GOD'S TRUTH.

But you need to know more than cut and dried answers.
All of the above questions go deeper than the surface, to which I have only covered. To get to the heart of the problem please e-mail me at : [e-mail]
God Bless you and take care of yourself.

Answer 6

Hey--we saw and answered this--why are you going over and over and over with this thing----ooops--I see--you went on a lonely hearts cruise hoping for some prince charming to come along and make your life a storybook fantasy. I bet you tramped it up real good--found a guy to lure and then WHAM--screwed his brains out and now you want all this attention and --frankly--sister, you aren't going to get it. !! The guy went on the lonely hearts cruise to screw anybody he could--and now he is stuck with you harsassing the sh-t out of him. If he wanted romance--he would be there right now--he doesn't want romance or YOU--so get a grip and a clue. This smacks of a sicko perverted desperate female with a horemone problem. He is doing the dirty deed with some other girls--you probably were terrible or smelled or you have a fat ***--so stop bothering him and us with this OLD story. get to a shrink and he will tell you--life is not a fairy tale !! I never give my name on a cruise--I see loser women every night--they would stick to the floor if they did a split---Jesus--get a life !!

Answer 7

this is the best advise that i can give you. if you felt that he liked you then you would not be asking this question. the truth of the matter is that you already know that he does not. i understand that your hurt but try to move on. good luck

Answer 8

You need to chalk that up as a learning experience.And let it go! Sounds like you may be a bit obsessed

Answer 9

i am sorry but,i wasn't able to finish your story.maybe you have the same effect of him,,i guess.either way can't you write in paragraph form?not to sound mean but,,,,,,it is a little easiler to read that way.

Answer 10

The award for longest question goes to... Seriously, he is the person you should be asking this stuff.