Ive never had a girlfriend, never had a first kiss, and obviously never had sex.
For the past year I've been putting alot of pressure on myself, I worked myself into a depression that I've finally gotten out of, and now nothing's changed?
I'm still shy but it's getting better. I'm not looking for a gf just so I can have sex.. I want the simple things that relationships provide. I want to be able to sit and talk with someone and actually have fun just wasting away the night talking. Stuff like this I seem to miss out on because I'm so quiet. It seems as if I'm also left out on alot of things because my friends just forget about me when I'm not around since I'm shy. I know people dont consider me ugly, all my friends with boyfriends have said they would date me.
for non believers heres a pic.
http://s175.photobucket.com/albums/w130/Draziok/?action=view¤t=Picture002.jpg
2007-11-23 12:45:53 · 37 answers · asked by confused. 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don't worry if you don't get anyone anytime soon. I'm 19 and I haven't had a real gf either. Not that I'm ugly. But I'm shy also. I think waiting for the right moment would be better. I've had girls tell me "I love you" but I stayed away from girls like that. And I know some have tried to ask me out. But I stay away from them too. Lol I just think it's too early to fall in love 'cause usually teen love never really lasts so yeah I'm just waiting patiently.
2007-11-23 12:52:51 · answer #1 · answered by Adam 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I'm really shy myself. I noticed if I did things I'm not really comfortable doing it actually makes me feel like I can do more then if I just didn't try at all. You aren't bad looking just a lot of people around our age really arent interested in having a real relationship. I'm not saying all aren't though. You seem like a really nice guy which might hold you back from doing things you want to try but just are to afraid to do. So my advice is take some risks. I know it's hard it'll be worth it in the end. The worst that can happen is it doesn't. Which you'd be there already if you don't even try. I'm sure you'll find the right one & things will happen! It just may take time. That's the hardest part of all, waiting.
2007-11-23 12:56:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good for you!
Dude.... what's such a big deal about sex? Yeah, it is a special thing... but so many ruin that.
Don't give up on yourself. I've been married 23 years (almost 24), am very successful in business, have three great kids who love me, and have close friends. I didn't have sex until much later. I wish I hadn't until I met my wife but I messed that up. I was able to recover from that. My wife was a virgin when we married.
It's good that you're intersted in actually getting to know and talk with people. I hear you about being shy and missing out on some things. If there are a couple of closer friends of yours, consider keeping in better touch with them so you can be closer to the "flow".
Force yourself to hang out from time to time. Invite a couple of folks over if that's appropriate at home.
Got a local coffeehouse (Starbuck, Panera, some private place) you like, or could like. Start checking it out and invite some friends and hang out there.
One of the best ways to help yourself is to choose to participate a bit more... you don't have to do a lot more and you don't have to be fake. Look for some quality people. Find one. If you don't know them, introduce yourself. See what happens.
Take one step forward... nothing more nothing less. You won't need to try really really hard. Just be yourself and find a few close friends.
Hope that helps.
2007-11-23 12:55:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey friend, don't sweat it!
I understand what you are going through and let me tell you - I didn't have a "serious GF" till 19 and I didn't get l a i d till 21 or 22. I can't remember. I'm 50 now and I've dated over 40 ladies and had lots of good experiences. I married once and lived with two others. Sorry, due to the life path I didn't settle down till now, but that is a whole other discussion.
Don't worry mate! You'll be in love dozens of times whether you get married or not. By the time your 30 you'll be a sexpert! I promise.
Oh and don't judge yourself by others. They ain't you. If your Friends give you unfriendly sh*t about this stuff, they ain't friends! TRUST ME!
Dig yourself. You have unique good qualities. We all do!
2007-11-23 12:55:59 · answer #4 · answered by Tom _ Red Sox fan 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're cute!
Well, maybe get a small trim on the hair, but longish hair is fine too! Try to smile a lot, be a real ladies man! Be polite, show them you care, flirt a little, find something to talk about and don't be shy! We like people who are talkative, interested in the same things, have a sense of humor. Make them laugh and smile, and after a while once you think you got someone falling for you, ask them out! GUYS are supposed to make the first move!
2007-11-23 12:56:37 · answer #5 · answered by Jen_n_TX 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well.. Hun, you are 15. A lot of my friends didn't start dating until they were 16-18. 15 is a hard year. Emotions are up and down, and everywhere. I struggled with depression at that age as well. Time will pass, and you will experience things. Don't rush anything, because you might regret it.
Patience.
I personally believe that dating in high school isn't a good idea. Everyone's emotions are everywhere, and the maturity levels are thrown off too.
Just be patient. Things will come in time.
2007-11-23 12:52:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm a 14 year old girl and I see where you are coming from. I've only had one boyfriend (dated him for six months, but never kissed him - or anyone).
Hopefully, a girl will just come along naturally. Don't sit and dwell on not having anyone. Maybe if you try not to think about it too much, a nice girl will come around when you least expect her.
Also, don't pressure yourself too much. Life is already stressful enough. Enjoy being free right now...
2007-11-23 13:09:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmm well its good your not looking for a gf just for sex. thats a plus. try not being so quiet around girls i mean dont say stupid stuff but jsut try and find a girl who likes the same things as u and treat her good. if u cant get a gf then put ur focus into school all the energy u would normally put in a realtionship into school means A A A A woot woot trust me i dont have a bf and i dont really care mainly cause all the hotties are repeating 8th and have 9th grade gf's and sides im shy too but not overlly shy
2007-11-23 12:52:33 · answer #8 · answered by NeKo-ChAn 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude...I know it's frustrating (I was 18). It's not all about milestones.
Worrying about all those things makes it worse. It's like worrying about not being on top of a mountain when you haven't even gone climbing.
How do you climb? Step by step.
You need to go out and seek activities involving other people. Put yourself out there. Dress nicely (not overboard, just be clean cut). Talk to ladies as people, find those with similar interests, go from there.
Will you fall? Yup, we all do. And it hurts. Grab the rope and start climbing some more. Good luck.
P.S. You haven't experienced many things your friends CLAIM to have experienced. Many of them are bold faced liars. I certainly was at 15.
2007-11-23 12:52:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Relax. You're a cute boy. All things will come in time. Don't stress yourself out about being on a time line. You'll meet the right girl eventually. For now, just enjoy yourself. I've had a few really shy boyfriends, and they were always the sweetest ones.
2007-11-23 12:53:06 · answer #10 · answered by jenny m 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋