My boyfriend and I have been dating 11 months. This week, I discovered that he no longer has a job. The day after I found out, I confronted him. He told me he quit over four months ago! He also said he was planning on telling me this weekend...I don't know if I believe that!
I couldn't believe what he was telling me! I knew he hated his job, I wouldn't have cared if he quit. The fact is he didn't tell me. Plus, what has he been doing for four months? I know he did tell me about job interviews he was going on.
For the last four months he has been telling me he was at work. During the day we email each other and he lend me to believe he was at work. We don't live together, but when we would go out at night he would bring his suit with in the car to make me think he came from work.
What do I do? How do I ever trust him again?
2007-11-23 12:10:43 · 10 answers · asked by AKM 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
That's a big lie.....up to you what you do but I wouldn't be minded to trust him again.
2007-11-23 12:13:29 · answer #1 · answered by Very happily married. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, that is a hard situation. His self-esteem may have been suffering or he was embarassed to tell you he lost his job. A man's sense of self-worth is often tied to his job. It does seem that he went to extremes to hide his situation, and this went on for 4 months....seems very odd. I think I would talk to him seriously and find out why he found it so hard to tell you the truth. Since you don't live together he may not have felt he had to burden you with his problems. I would be wary though of how this might spill over into a permanent relationship should you marry. Honesty with a spouse is very important.
2007-11-23 12:18:54 · answer #2 · answered by ScSpec 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough one. You need to set the record straight with him. If you know a good friend of his, get as much as you can out of them! It all depends on the evidence of what is going on around him. Then tell him what you found out. He will 99.9 % end up being angry with you but that is when you tell him you did it just because you care about him. You most certainly need to tell him why you care so much about this and how you could be able to trust him again. Once he knows how you feel he probably will pour his heart out to you and tell you everything. Always be prepared for the worst if something is wrong. Be strong if things don't go the way you planned.
2007-11-23 12:17:38 · answer #3 · answered by LOVE.song 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you can prolly trust him. I mean, yes, he lied, but obviously, he did it to protect you. He cares so much about you, he doesn't want you to think he's a bum...and can't support himself, and maybe in the future...you. So, all you need to do is sit him down and ask him why he did it. He'll probably be honest, cuz i mean, you know, so what is there to hide? The only bad possibility, and not to scare you, but, WHAT was he doing instead of being at work??? You need to ask him this, and if you feel as if he's not being honest, tell him, and tell him that you don't think it's going to work out between you and him very well.
2007-11-23 12:15:06 · answer #4 · answered by Mrs. Cullen 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All relationships are based on TRUST and you have been
deliberately deceived by someone who claims they Love you.
No,he is a liar,simple. Why would he lie? What else is he keeping from you? Run from your deceiver, you are being used. This is not love and love does not act this way. You trust him only when he completely confesses his sins against you and begins to do God's will over his own.
2007-11-23 12:25:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like your man is living a double life behind your back. Who know's what he was doing while he said he was at work...maybe with other girls? If he acually went to the extent of bringing his suit with him to make you think he was coming home from work, then he is seriously pre meditave and you shouldn't trust him at all..
2007-11-23 12:16:21 · answer #6 · answered by kristina43 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't trust him. He lied more than once...it wasn't just a lie about his job...it was the continuation of the one lie. He didn't feel guilty once...because he continued to do it!
2007-11-23 12:14:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah in that situation he deffinatly lost alot of trust from me if i was his gf... just make sure he gets a job and soon! but the whole trust issue is hes just going to have to gain it back
2007-11-23 12:13:51 · answer #8 · answered by cait 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't trust no boyfriend. Wether he lies or not. But you can love him if you choose.
2007-11-23 12:15:40 · answer #9 · answered by pee pee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's lying now, he'll continue to do it.
2007-11-23 12:13:40 · answer #10 · answered by calgontakemeaway2008 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋