I'm 19 and I am so ready to move out. Im in college and have a new car, bills, all that so I cant afford it. but I am going crazy living here! my family treats me like im 7 years old. while im in the shower my mom goes through my cell, tries to long onto my facebook, even goes through my purse and my car! ive asked her so many times to stop but she doesnt. she cries if I get a C on a test or if em and my boyfriend have a fight. she always somehow finds out and then its like I actually have to calm her down! its so weird...and I cant take it. why does she feel the need to know (and try to control) every move I make
2007-11-23 09:50:08 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
she's probably just worried about you, but i think she's overdoing it. what about your dad, can't he do anything about it.if he can't do anything, then you should probably wait until you move out and be patient.
2007-11-23 09:56:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A M.o.m is the only woman in your family that will or may always treat you like a baby. Chances are, she already knows that your grown and responsible, but she's not ready to let you go on your own. Consider explaining to her, that looking through your things is a bad deed. There might be a reason why she acts so. Maybe, because you don't spend much time with her/family? She might feel useless, because you don't talk to her about your life, so she tries to unlock your bedroom door herself. Even if you don't like to talk with her, try to at least tell her the good things that happened in college. Don't go into details, give her the background, a blurry watercolor.
P.S- plan your time, and erase all of your private msgs on your cell if you need to
2007-11-23 18:19:18 · answer #2 · answered by Angie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably realizes that you are looking to move out, and knows that once you leave, her chances of finding out what's going on in your life will be very limited.
Try talking to her more about whats going on with your bf and what is happening at school, and she might not pry so much.
And as for a new house, find something like a cheap-ish apartment and get the best job possible to pay the bills.
Your parents might even help you out in that aspect.
You could also get a loan from the bank.
Good Luck!!!
2007-11-23 18:12:09 · answer #3 · answered by Blondieeee™ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It looks like you've boxed yourself in and the only option is to 1) either live with it until you've paid your bills and can move out; or 2) sell the new car, get a student loan (if they still have those anymore), find a student boarding house that gives room and board near campus, and buckle down in your classes so that you can then move into independence on solid ground--in other words, make enough money to support yourself! Life is full of options and we're never trapped. We just have to decide on what we want most.
2007-11-23 18:01:05 · answer #4 · answered by Martell 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your mother is too involved your life. It is because she loves you, but it isn't healthy for her or you. It sounds as though she doesn't have a life of her own and is living it through you. Thing is, as long as you are living under her roof there isn't a lot you can do - it's one of the prices you pay for having a mother and somewhere to live. Nothing comes free but at least it will give you the incentive to work hard and get your own life without being obliged to put up with her interference.
2007-11-23 18:00:32 · answer #5 · answered by ozinnz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you want to move out, you may want to think about selling your new car for an older, cheeper car. If your phone and car are in your name and you pay the bills on them and if she tries to log onto your screen name, she can probably get in trouble with the law. Tell her that and that if she doesn't stop going through your things, you will get her into trouble.
2007-11-23 17:58:24 · answer #6 · answered by RedRabbit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is your mother. There is a connection that only a mother has with her children and at times it is hard to understand. There parents like your mother who are overly attached to there children. You need to take that step out into the real world. Have a talk with her and let her know you love her and you are doing this for her and yourself. She needs to let go and you need to be free. It will be hard to move out but try to find a good room mate and budget. You are an adult you need to start acting like one. Good Luck!
2007-11-23 18:10:33 · answer #7 · answered by Nicole Z 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, she cares about you, but she has to realize that you are 19, not 12. Confide in her as much as you can, so she will still feel needed and valued, but if it was me, I would be taking my handbag/cellphone etc into the bathroom with me when I showered!
2007-11-23 18:00:40 · answer #8 · answered by Lauren J 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she feels like she'll lose u. she probably misses the days when u needed her and wanted to share things about ur life with her. she cares about you is all.
2007-11-23 17:56:42 · answer #9 · answered by pleasehelp 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
bc she cares about you
its only natural...when u have kids of your own, you'll probably understand
2007-11-23 17:54:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋