How do you help your family with dealing with your cancer?

Question

I have a 15 year old who has little contact with her father I know that she's going to be especially afraid of something happening to me. Even though they are pretty sure it's 1st stage breast cancer and the prognosis is good how do I help her deal with her fear? I also have to deal with what I'm going through are there support groups for the families or children of cancer patients?

Answer 1

There are support groups for families and children of cancer patients. You should start with your oncologist and ask for a medical social worker. Usually the social workers known all the local support groups or may even be involved with them. That is the first place to start. There are also online groups that can be of assistance.

However, you may be surprised by your daughter . .she may be stronger than you imagine. To begin with the best way to deal with her fear is to tell her the truth . . always. The imagination is far worse . . . tell her exactly what is happening. If you go to the doctor, tell her why. Tell her if you are having treatment. Explain the treatment. Include your daughter as much as she wants to be included. Obviously if she does not want to be involved or hear this . . than back away a bit. But always make sure she hears the truth from you. There is no substitute for honesty . . share the good news and the bad. Your daughter will feel included and not left out. She will appreciate your honesty and learn about courage and strength from you.

To help guide you through any of this, you can use the following online resources:

Cancer Care - free online counseling for cancer patients and families
http://www.cancercare.org/

Cancer Care - Talking to kids about cancer
http://www.cancercare.org/get_help/special_progs/cc_for_kids.php

ACS: Be Honest with children about breast cancer
http://www.cancer.org/docroot/NWS/content/NWS_1_1x_Be_Honest_with_Children_About_Breast_Cancer.asp

Kids Konnected
http://www.kidskonnected.org/

NCI: When your parent has cancer - a guide for teens
http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/When-Your-Parent-Has-Cancer-Guide-for-Teens/page2

Cancer Connection - Teens with Mom who has cancer
http://www.gillettecancerconnect.org/women/family_friends/for_kids.asp

My Parent's Cancer
http://www.myparentscancer.com.au/home.html

Straight Talk: How to Talk to your Kids about Cancer
http://www.med.nyu.edu/nyuci/patientcare/support_services/straight_talk/

Rip Rap - When a parent has cancer
http://www.riprap.org.uk/index.html

Teen Central
http://www.teencentral.net/

Hope that helps get you started. Best of luck.

Answer 2

Both my parents were diagnosed with cancer within a year of each other. It was very scary for me and my brother, the thought of not having them. The best advice I can give is to be positive and allow lots of support and encouragement from family, friends, church, etc. Your attitude and outlook has a big impact on how your daughter will handle things. When my parents were going through treatment, I remember being very scared when they were scared, sad when they were sad, and when they would laugh, I would laugh, thats kinda how it works. As kids, we can only go by how you're feeling and try to be there for you. I've met other people who have a parent(s) with cancer and it forces the kid to grow up and be a bit more responsible. As for support groups, I don't know that either of my parents ever attended any, but I know that at times I wish there would have been something for my brother and I, we felt very alone. Also, be aware, each person handles this situation differently. I handled it by being by my parents side at every moment, where as my brother handled it by distracting himself with friends and other things at first. However, you are in the right place, I found most of my support by reading message boards like this and finding other people online who were going through the same thing. Good luck with your treatment. Stay positive and don't ever let a prognosis get you down, just find out what you have to do to get better. Take care

Answer 3

The first contributor is right. A lot of it will be based on your attitude. Therefore, call your local mental health facility and ask what support groups they might know of. You can also ask your doctor. They are usually very well versed in community resources related to your diagnosis. The positive attitude will help make getting through this all the easier. Breast cancer is a very beatable cancer. It will make you appreciate each other more and hopefully grow your relationship. Best of luck and I will be praying for you.

Answer 4

YOU should give the family some "common sense" information about the type of cancer that is being experienced. They should be informed as to what they should expect as your reaction to it, and what "cures" are available. Then you should ask them to "pray" for you and have their "church family" also pray for you. I am talking about continuous praying. What shall we then say to these things? If GOD be for us, WHO can be against us? - Romans 8:31. The Lord daily loadeth us with BENEFITS, even the God of our salvation. Selah. - Psalm 68:19. BEFORE you enter a room or a building, quietly say "Peace Be To This House." - Luke 10:5. Those who are within those premises will have a more peaceful demeanor. This will be very helpful to you. On a daily basis, read Psalm 35 to (Plead My Cause) - It is a long-winded and very powerful psalm. Your only requirement is to be sincere when asking God for His help. I wish you well. Peace, Love and God Bless.

Answer 5

visit www.cancer.org and you will find a wealth of resources on helping kids deal w/a diagnosis in the family. as well, they have a cancer support group called I Can Cope that is for the patient and/or the family. there are also books that can be ordered. Also, they are available 24/7/365 for information and support, resources in your hometown by calling 1.800.ACS.2345.

Answer 6

Human psychology is complicated. Your fiancé has been confronted with mortality, and the medical care weakened him. Pardon the amateur psych bit, yet ought to he be coping by making use of reversion to formative years? From his relatives's attitude, he grew to become into effective earlier he met you, and you may't shout at maximum cancers. you are going to might desire to deal with being a scapegoat, a minimum of for the dimensions of the restoration. i could advise you insist on couples medical care. If he refuses, decrease him unfastened. (in case you do and he begs for a 2nd possibility, i could supply him the earnings of the doubt if he meets your situations.) he's dealing with lots, and it may be sturdy it you're there for him. on the different hand, if he won't artwork at getting greater efficient, you could no longer do something for him. i do no longer understand you and have not heard his area. it relatively is purely a gut feeling, and that i need to be thoroughly off base. All i understand is that the grieving technique is a lot from over.

Answer 7

If you can handle it, talk openly about it and ask them what they would like to talk about. Keep the communications open. Let her know her feelings are okay.