How hard is it being a single parent?

Question

I was wondering how hard (or easy) people find it bringing up their kid(s) on their own. Mums and dads please.

Answer 1

I don't think there is ONE answer. I guess it depends on how blessed the single parent is with inolved friends/family, and more so, financially. Of course, money shouldn't make the world go round the way it does, but to raise a child/children, you need it. Period. If you're rich, you'll have an easier time, materialistically.
Personally, I've learned this.. I have two daughters, one almost 6, one 2 years. My oldest.... I spoiled rotten. It was just her and I. Then came my youngest, and to this very day, I'm struggling very hard to "parent/disipline" my oldest daughter. It's my fault she is the way she is. My 2 year old is great. I spoiled her, with LOVE. My oldest had my love, and toys toys toys, etc.
Whether you have one or more, yes, it's hard. I can't explain it though... You just "do it" every day and don't think twice about it. You just know you have the greatest love of your life who you need to take care of(I guess not all, as I see in the world some parents lack love for their children, thus leaving these children cold, hungry, tired, longing to be loved).

I know this doesn't answer, but hopefully provides some input...

Answer 2

I've been a single parent for almost 17 years to a now 20 yr old and a 17yr old. There dad has had no contact yet lives half an hour away.

There are some parts that are hard - financially is probably the biggest - always being the one who says no - having no one to jump in when you've had enough - having no one to share your children's triumphs with.

The easy parts are you make the rules - no negotiating on parenting styles - you make all the financial decisions - you become a really tight unit - one day when your kids have grown up and realise what you as a parent has accomplished they will look at you in awe

A lot of people look down on single parents and unfortunately a lot of kids are expected to go down the wrong road

I'm proud to say my 20yr old is now a qualified Diversional Therapist and got her first job to kick start her career today.

My 17yr old is starting uni in the new year doing a bachelor of business with a major in event management

It's possible to bring up happy, well adjusted kids in a single parent family

Answer 3

I was engaged, found out I was pregnant and got dumped. I had my daughter alone at 20 yrs old.

Financially, I had a descent job so although I needed to watch my spending carefully, I was fine. The one thing that pops into my head when I hear single mother is loneliness. Being a single parent is lonely. Who do you run to when they first walk, talk, bring home that A. It is lonely. Even trick or treating with other kids and their parents is a reminder that you are alone.

I am now married with my daughter (16) and a 3 yr old boy. I am not lonely. I would not change a thing because if I wasn't alone with her I wouldn't have become the woman that I am but I will never forget the loneliness. It was hard. I am talking about the nights, the school events, the family things when you are just not part of a couple/family. My daughter and I made an amazing team and still do but I wonder what it would have been like if I had met my husband sooner.

Answer 4

it is different for everyone but I chose to be a single mum and it is not a problem to me. I suppose I don't know any different but I look at married friends and think I have it easier. There are one set of rules for my kids to follow and no one to run to that may change them. If the house is a mess at night I don't stress because a husband is coming home. If i want to have an easy night cooking I don't have to worry about what a husband would want when he gets home. If we want pancakes we have them. No one to argue with because the bins haven't been put out or some other job. The kids lives aren't disrupted by a grumpy angry father ( I know many are not like this but fights with parents happen and kids get scared by this). On the other hand it is me that has to do everything. There is no one to share the load with or watch the kids while they are asleep so I can duck out to do something.
So is it hard?....I don't find it that hard but i know many do. I am not trying to be a hero...all parenting is hard but I look at married friends and I believe i have it easier. I enjoy being a single mum, but if I was to meet a guy I would definatly give marriage a go

Answer 5

It is very hard but at times it is easy. Different situations bring different problems and differnet solutions. Sometimes it is easier being alone but at other times, you thank god you have partner. i have been a single parent and am now married and i do find it A LOT easier being married. But in saying that, i was in a completly differnt state of mind and place in my life when i was a single mum. i was very young, people looked down on me, had no idea what i was doing and had no help. Now it is the opposite!

Answer 6

it's hard but you get through it with a lot of communication and understanding. it all depends you could have a financial struggle, the kids could be having problems in school because you and the other parent are no longer together. but make sure you tell them that it is not their fault and make sure they know that they are the most important things in your life and they mean everything to you. love gets you though just about everything

Answer 7

It is really difficult ,requiring patience and handling some of their life affairs with their dad,i raised my 2daughters with my own until their marriage,although their dad supported them financially ,and saw them 3 times a week in their childhood but from time to time i needed to have an agreement with him to have the same laws of agreeing or refusing and treating them in order not to be confused about different ways we lived and treated them, avoid talking badly about the other parent in front of kids it is very dangerous for their mental and psychological development, they would not love or respect both of you ,don't go with other parent in a competition of any sort specially if he is richer clear calmly that role of love and living peacefully is not less than financial support,if there is no connection between parents and there is enough money it will be to a great extent ok ,divorce is a ceparation between man and wife not between kids and one parent unless he escaped totally from his or her reponsb,keep at least one of other parent relative in good connection in case of difficulties in connect him ,yes it requires a lot of efforts to raise them aloan safely ,now i am agrandmother and many of their dad's rerelatives are my friends,good luck

Answer 8

It is very difficult to do but if you can be with your children you simply have to do it. I am in a situation where I have had children with my brother's doubles and they are all being abducted all the time. They are also children who I have already known. One example is that I went to school with a lot of Goddesses and this is who the children are. I have also had myself stolen because some of the children are me and I can't stand any of the mothers. Pre-natal torture of my children with will technology is one of the things they were all doing. If you can get it together enough to reproduce and the mother is not real get them away from the mothers no matter what. The children might be your grand parents who have been stolen.

Answer 9

It's very hard but if you get group or individual support and always remember the child or children come first and protection of them means not everyone that comes around is safe for them to be around.

Smooches

WonderWoman

Answer 10

I have found it remarkably easy except for the money situation. I have been blessed with really great kids who even though they have learning disabilities have been really easy children to take care of and to love. When they were having problems I knew to get them professional help so that things didn't get to far a head of them. My older daugther's father died of cancer and she was sexually assaulted, I made sure to get her into therapy ASAP. When my youngest was born 5 years later and her father became and addict I made sure that she went into therapy also, when we found out that she had learning disabilities and she was having problems in school with that I made sure that she was put back into therapy and she's been in therapy ever since and she's an honor student and a cheerleader and a volunteer for her school. I made sure that I was open to my daughter's needs and got them help when I couldn't help them. I wanted them to be able to grow up independent and sure of who they are and what they have to offer.