I was in a really rocky relationship about 8 yrs ago with a man who nearly killed me. He had a really nice brother who looked after me, and made sure I was ok. As a matter of fact the brother drove by my house on Sunday and waved. I was really surprised to see him in this neck of the woods.
I about flipped when I saw his name in the obituaries yesterday. He died. I dont know how or why or what its all about, but I am so sad. Should I go to the funeral? I am afraid I will hash up some old hateful emotions since I dumped the brother and married someone else within a short time. The family basically dislikes me.
2007-11-22 05:57:01 · 12 answers · asked by happydawg 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I agree with the first answerer. Don't go and put yourself in a position of confrontation. Pray for him instead- god bless
2007-11-22 06:05:42 · answer #1 · answered by June S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Happy, if you decide to go I'd suggest you go with your husband, or some friends. The relationship you had with the man that nearly killed you isn't a reason to go, but the brother may be. Also the family wouldn't miss you either! I'd say go only if it's a have to situation, they are your family nor kin. So to avoid conflict I'd stay home! Maybe you could go to the services and not to the actual burial of your friend. Take care! Jimmy.
2007-11-22 14:24:59 · answer #2 · answered by Jimmy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO. The family is already in turmoil and unhappy, you may stir up old feeling from them and may cause a scene. This family is greiving so leave them greive, however a nice card sent to his mother would be totally appropriate. Do not mention the relationship with the brother, just express your condolences.
2007-11-22 14:08:01 · answer #3 · answered by jen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. The funeral is for the family and since they dislike you, you would be infringing on them during a sad time for them. Just send his brother a nice sympathy card.
2007-11-22 14:13:18 · answer #4 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a great guy, so I can understand why you’d want to pay your respects. BUT, if the family dislikes you, stay away from the funeral. Respect their right to grieve without any added 'drama'.
2007-11-22 14:07:11 · answer #5 · answered by kp 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to attend a funeral to mourn someone's passing. Why not spend the time remembering him as he was. The how, why or what of his death is not important, the fact that he existed and touched your life is enough.
2007-11-22 16:29:40 · answer #6 · answered by boogaloo1962 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should go to his funeral..cause if you dont go there will be alot of regrets and if the family says anything just tell them look i knew him for a long time and leave it at that you should pay your respects to him as he had done for you.. GOod LuCk
2007-11-22 16:03:02 · answer #7 · answered by mommyandbaby 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if you feel like it will be a day experience for you and it may be a bad idea because you may run in to you ex, then send flowers and a card, and later go visit the grave
2007-11-22 16:12:54 · answer #8 · answered by George 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no reason to go if the family dislikes you.
2007-11-22 14:07:15 · answer #9 · answered by Dr. E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you'll regret not going.
Go.
You knew him. You have every right to be there.
Maybe stay in the background a bit. If they start hassling - just leave. Or say ' This day is about him. Not you.'
2007-11-22 14:02:04 · answer #10 · answered by ... 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋