please help me?

Question

can any1 help i have this evil M.I.L in march 2006 i got pregnant and i moved into my patrners mums and dad house everything was great!! until towards the end of my pregnancy she started taking over i never chose my pram my M.I.L she always made the decisions when the baby was born and when you give the baby his first bath and bonding and stuff me and my partner coulnt have tht time togethner with our new baby cuz she was there and didnt allow it .when the baby wud cry she wud snatch him away frm me and tell me tht she wud get social services on me & my partner if i didnt do wot she wanted i told my boyfriend about it and he tried and now my sons 11mnths old and she still goes on now my boyfriend always listens to his mum and aggressive with me i feel like im on my own no support frm my partner she has wrecked my life i cant forgive her ever is tht evil ?all i wanted to be was a family and MUM wot should i do truthly thankyou xxxx

Answer 1

First, get out of that house. You and your partner should be living in your own home in the first place.

Second, be firm. You are the mother of the child. So consult a lawyer and ask for advice.

Sounds like she wanted to bond with the child and want you out of the picture. Better start acting now.

Answer 2

well, this is YOUR kid, no hers. The next time your baby cries and she comes to snatch him away from you, with every ounce of my heart i really think you should just tell her to back the hell up. and if that doesn't work infest in some mace. Because really, this is your son, your flesh, and he came from you not her. It may be hard, but i really think that you should talk to your partner about moving out. Thats the only way this thing is going to end on its own. If he doesn't want to move out, you need to on your own. This women isn't making your life any easier and a mother shouldn't have to worry about a phyco like this women. The only thing you should be worried about is your son. Not forgiving this women doesn't make you evil, at all. She is destorying the time you should have with your son with her ways. you aren't going to be a family and a mother like you want to be unless you move. Now. You said you told your boyfriend about this and he has tried? I think you should try and talk to him again and tell him that he should try harder. By the way, social services won't do anything to you and your partner as long as you are not abusing the baby, and i can tell that you would never do that. Don't worry about that empty threat. Babies cry, its what they do. So please, before you miss out on this oppertunity to be a mother, move out. Don't let someone talk that away from you. Best of luck,

Answer 3

Sarah:
This is not as uncommon as it should be. Your partner is a mom's boy and if you put yourself against his mom you are always going to come in second. You need to decide if the social support you are receiving is worth the parental authority it is costing you. As for Social Services being called, tell you MIL to get stuffed. You have done the best you can but it is time to decide who is going to the mom to your kid. It real comes down to you or your MIL. You partner is of no help and that is not going to chance. Sit down and thing very carefully about what is best for baby. Your feelings although important are not a sufficient reason by them self to make a chance. If you will not be able to care for baby, you need to accept that your MIL is being overbearing and unreasonable but may well have baby's best interests at heart and is better suited right now to care for baby than you and your partner.

Good Luck and make the best choice for Baby.

Answer 4

You need to move out of her house IMMEDIATELY! If you don't, then it will go on until you snap & kill her. Once you move away, then you'll have the power again. You can tell her no if she wants to visit & keep the baby away from her until she behaves. That's what my mom did to my grandmother & it worked. I've even done it to my M.I.L. You probably won't get support from your partner. So you'll have to go it alone. Good luck!

Answer 5

you need to tell your partner you won't put up with this anymore. if he won't support you, you need to get out. your son is only 11 months now, imagine how he'll grow up in that environment. he'll see you as something to be abused. why put him through that? if you've got nowhere else to go, get in touch with social services and ask them to place you both in a refuge. or you could just walk into a police station either. so many people fear social services, and a lot of sadistic sods use the name as a stick to beat you with. while i was a social worker for older people, i did have a lot of contact with child social workers and found them to be very caring. they don't want to remove kids and would help you if you give them a chance. please don't stay in that situation, for your son's sake as well as yours. good luck, diane.

Answer 6

First thing to do is get out, go toa friends or try one of your family members, if you can't do that get in touch with your local battered wives refuge, they WILL help you.
You can go to social services yourself although you may findyou will have to defend youself to the false accusations from your inlaws, but you must get out, good luck xx

Answer 7

As hard as it will be, you need to get out of that house. Your partner needs to be supportive of you and your MIL sounds like a real crack-pot. Start by seeing a lawyer.

Answer 8

No, she is not evil; she is concerned about her grandchild. And you, my dear, are ungrateful with a disproportionate sense of entitlement. You (pregnant) moved into her home. You and your boyfriend aren't married. You say you wanted to be a family? Well, then, you and boyfriend need to get out of her home and start being a family. I don't care HOW assertive someone is with the care of your baby, that doesn't stop your bonding with your child. I suspect your boyfriend's mother (she is NOT your mother-in-law) felt she had to take charge because you weren't adept at it. Of course, she was always there...I reiterate, it's her house; why should she not always be there? Get your own place, get out of hers, and quit hating on someone who gave you and your boyfriend a place to live.

Answer 9

Sounds like a very destructive relationship and you should look at getting out of it, for the sake of yourself and your son