my man's always broke these days as hes doing college and working full time, but by the time he pays the rent and bills he has no money left for anything else, i'm better off than him and i feel as he knows this he excpects me to lend him money and feed him for free when hes down at my house, i dont think its fair as i have a child to feed and one on the way but he says he just has'nt got it to give me, what should i do? he says things will improve when he qualifies, i love him but the money thing is coming between us.
2007-11-21 22:52:30 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My dear lady, be careful with the "love" thing. I do not know enough to judge this man, but you should know better.
Love is a very ambiguous feeling. Ask yourself if you would still love him if a better man come along and love you in the way of providing for you sufficiently and give you physical satisfaction as well as emotionally stability. A person who would rather burden himself than giving you all these hardship.
I hope this boyfriend is not just leaning on you to support him through his own hardship. But, I would expect him to find means to get more money to support himself if not to provide for you and your kids.
Think deeply and make some decision. He should in all manners be nice enough to discuss the situation with you and find some solutions together.
2007-11-22 17:07:20 · answer #1 · answered by Tortee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is paying his rent and bills at least, which is good, but he has to realise that you may be better off, but you cannot afford to let him lean on you as well. Can you sit down with him and work out where his spare cash is going, ie, nights out?, because he must have some money left over to buy food and general household products! he needs to start putting a budget into place, as you cannot feed him forever, once this baby comes along, you will need all the spare cash you can, as you are well aware. He must have some money somewhere when all is paid, seems like he needs to think about what he is spending it on and see what he can cut back on. I mean, what the hell would he do if you were not in his life? Starve?
2007-11-21 23:27:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you end up with the correct character you must not combat all the instances. That's how I suppose, if I get into a relationship with any individual who we become fighting so much, I be able to interrupt the connection considering that it hurts too much. You must be dealing with your insecurities if they are a influence of your possess jealousies moving into the way in which or if he is giving off a vibe that makes you believe that means. Most relationships the place there are various breakups and then makeups the weaker the entire relationship becomes and pretty soon you two would turn out to be simply breaking it off anyway.
2016-08-06 08:15:41 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's no fun when money is an issue. I've seen it break up a lot of couples. Some people believe that love is supposed to be unconditional, but I think if you are asking about it you are having doubts about yourself or about him. He may just be leeching off of you.
Knowing nothing about you or about him (he might really be trying), I'd say he needs to look at his budget and at the very least be able to provide for himself. If he's not making enough money it's time for a better or another job!
2007-11-21 23:01:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it seems simple enough. Just tell him you don't have extra money to lend him. If he objects to that answer as a final say on the matter it sounds as if you need to rethink the relationship. If he puts his own needs above yours and your children's he is selfish and wouldn't be a good partner anyway. Better to find this out now rather than later. Good luck.
2007-11-21 23:00:55 · answer #5 · answered by Slimsmom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you should go on Parental Control on MTV... haha jk. i know what situation he is in because i am in the same one but i dont assume others to give me money unless im in an absolute bind, then i ask my parents but ive only done that once.
if you want to keep the relationship alive and going you need to talk to him and instead of going out and doing things. try having dates at your homes and eat there. find things to do that dont cost money until he gets a little more money. he cant mooch off you. thats wrong and immature.
2007-11-21 22:59:23 · answer #6 · answered by CaitliOn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, you sons of #####es wanted equality. Here it is, I ain't sayin he's a gold digger. J/k lol. I was there too once, no money and a generous girl. He has to pay off his expenses and not borrow any more money or acquire more bills. That way he can take you and your kid out to dinner at night and such.
2007-11-21 23:57:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you love him, and enjoy his company, but you will not be able to loan him money or feed him any longer. Tell him that if he wants to come over and watch movies after you and your child have dinner, then you would love to have him over. Tell him that you feel that you are cheating your child out of a lot of things that you should be able to provide for her.
2007-11-21 22:59:52 · answer #8 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like you have two children. not just one.
if you insist on wanting to help him, make him work for the money.
if it bothers you, dump him.
personally, i think that one should be financially responsible before getting in a relationship. the situation would of course be different if you were married, but it sounds like he is taking advantage of you.
2007-11-21 23:12:49 · answer #9 · answered by Christie Brucks 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Careful, he may just dump you and move on when he qualifies. I know someone this happened to and this guy seems to spin the same line he did.
2007-11-22 00:21:38 · answer #10 · answered by ketkonen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋