how do I tell her that I gave her...?

Question

this is probably the hardest thing I have to do in my life..

my girlfriend of a month told me last week that she was tested positive for chlamydia, but I did not had any symptoms previously. I trust her so that means I've given it to her, that leads me to come to suspect that one of my ex gave it to me about two month ago..

here's what I'm really stumping over about, right before my gf told me about this, I had sex with this other girl and now I'm scared that I've given it to her too, I know, I shouldn't have done that, and I'm feeling terribly guilty right now. I've went to my church but I just can't calm myself down, how can I tell her this? I'm feeling really really bad right now.. please help..

Thank you all for your support, this is a hard time for me and all your words means a lot to me.
Might I add some details, yes, my current g/f had an ex she just broke up with before me, but she told me only after we had sex for the first time (a week after that) that she had vaginal discharge. I don't want to doubt her that's why I said I believe her. and yes, I'll tell everyone involved about this asap, thank you all for your kind answers.

Answer 1

OK look it's quite simple you both have to be treated at same time with anti biotics.
If you think or know you gave it to her then passed it on to the girl you slept with night before g/f told you she too will be infected.
One thing in all this how do you know it's you maybe g/f has been playing around also.?
Either way all parties need to be treated at same time or you will reinfect each other.
Where was the condom's safe sex...?? Hmmm ♥

Answer 2

Bummer!

First, go to your local health clinic. All major cities have some kind of public facility where you can get tested cheap. They're used to this every day, and you'll be just another John Doe to them. And the data is confidential.

You may as well get a full STD screen while you're at it. Chlamydia ain't the only beastie out there.

IF you're really lucky, you'll test negative, and you don't need to tell the "other girl" anything.

On the other hand, if you're positive, is it possible that your g/f passed it to you, and you to the other girl?

Either way, if you're positive, you really need to tell the other girl about it. Both of you made the decision to boink on short notice, and that's the risk you take. If she did it with you, she'll probably do it with somebody else soon, if she hasn't already.

The only right thing to do is to tell her, and for her to tell anybody else she's been with. That way everyone will (I hope) get treated and cured before it spreads even more.

Meanwhile, if your g/f has only been sleeping with you for a month or less, it's quite possible that she had it before you got together with her. Did she accuse you, or just tell you? If she she just informed you, that means she knows it could have been (one of) her previous sex partner(s).

No matter what, the important thing is to get treated and cured before things go any further.

On the bright side, at least chlamydia is curable, unlike some other diseases. And you won't have to be paying child support for the next 18 years, either!

Good luck!

Answer 3

Well, you're certainly going to feel a lot better once you inform all of the women you've been with recently so that they can get themselves checked out...that's the larger concern right now.You can't undo this so beating yourself up over it isn't helpful, in fact it could delay your telling them, and that shouldn't happen. You'll have plenty of time to assess your feelings later on; right now,"feel" less and act more. Once you've protected everyone as best you can, then you can evaluate the wisdom of your moves, but by then you'll also know you've done the best you could to rectify the situation. And you'll feel "less bad". There are probably some rough days ahead here in the near future, but keep your focus on the importance of the task and don't allow any of the various things you're about to hear throw you off track. Good luck.

Answer 4

You have 2 issues here.
1 you are contagious, and you spread it.
2 you cheated on your gf

You have to tell both girls. Say something like.. this is hard for me to say, but you gotta know- I was having some pain down there and decided to get it looked at. I'm sorry to tell you this, but I have chlamydia. I didn't have symptoms until now, and even if you don't have any thing wrong, you could too. I care about you, so please get checked. Thees a medicine for it, and it will go away with treatment.
You can address the cheating thing seperatly, at nother time, but you gotta tell both girls because if keft untreated, they could getr seriously sick. And that would be harder to live with, right? It is hard, but not doing it is harder.
Write it down if you have to.
But do it, and soon.

Answer 5

Even though i hate cheaters with every part of me, i do feel for you and your situation. I think you should be 100% honest with her, tell her the truth. that guilty feeling with subside when you tell her. Or you can choose to keep it from her. Its your call, but i believe she deserves your honesty and she needs to be able to make a decision to be with you, with ALL the facts. If it is meant to be you guys can work through anything. If she chooses to not be with you because of this, then at least you were true to yourself by telling the truth.

She will probably find out anyway, so the best thing to do is tell her as soon as you can, lying or not telling her will just make things a lot worse. You have a choice to make right now, step up and confess to her, or keep it from her, either way make sure you get tested, both of you need to be treated so you are not giving it back to one another. .. .

good luck and i do hope that your situation gets better ;)

Answer 6

Be honest and tell her. It will allow her to go to the doctor and get tested. It's the right thing to do. Also, people tend to lie when it comes to sex and what they have done so please don't completely trust your new gf yet-it's only been a month. Also be sure you go to the doctor as well. Good luck to you.

Answer 7

ok dude calm down do some prayers and tell her about it and tell her how bad you feel and apoligize to all the girls that you have had sex with to my count there are 3 i bet there's more and i hope your sorry for ruining other girls life if i were a boy i would kill myself for doing that or would pray day and night to make that sin come off of me

Answer 8

well... first off if you love her then you will tell her. Then again if you loved her you wouldnt have done it. You know that though. Um I would just come out with it. It will be hard but it will be much harder to live with the guilt of her not knowing. Good luck!

Answer 9

Well just tell her. I think it's better you tell her than her finding out. Chlamydia is cureable now and It's not like you gave her Aids or hiv. You don't even have to tell her one on one just tell her some how any form of communication.

Answer 10

Most STD's don't have symptoms so it's not like you did it on purpose. Tell your lovers that you want to be cautious so you want yourself and everyone else to get tested. Tell them it's because your cousin got it and now you want to be more cautious. And start using protection. Women are cheating as much as men now -in-days.