My fiance's sister got married a year and a half ago, and, although I gave her lingerie at her bridal shower, my fiance (who was in the wedding) and I never got her a proper wedding gift. We were planning to do it shortly after the wedding, but never did, and it's been hanging over my head for a long time now. I would really like to get her a wedding gift now, but am not sure how to do it without seeming tacky. I am especially worried, now that I am engaged, that she will think I am only giving her a gift in order to get one from her next June.
I know I got myself into a bad situation etiquette-wise, but what is the best thing I can do to get out of it? (I am considering getting an expensive household item -- like a set of good kitchen knives -- to give to her at Christmas and explaining to her then that it is to make up for the wedding gift we didn't buy.)
2007-11-21 14:35:07 · 7 answers · asked by Emmy Jo (13 weeks with #2) 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I've always found honesty to be the best way out of a bind.
Buy the kind of gift you wanted to and pass it on with your belated congratulations. Tell her what you told us. That you always meant to give something but started to feel embarassed as the time went by.
2007-11-21 15:08:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Oh boy....this is a tough one. I think at this point I would not give a wedding gift. Not only has a year and a half passed since the big day, but I do not know how you could now give a gift at this point in time without it looking like you are fishing for a return for your own wedding.
So then we are faced with the ackward way you feel about it. You dont mention if the two of you are close or not. Obviously no one has said anything about it in this amount of time, or you could have expressed to them what happened and that time got away from you and made your appologies. So, perhaps it has been forgotton. Also you had given her a gift at her shower, and your fiance was in the wedding (which has its own related costs on his behalf) and perhaps your future sister and her hubby felt that was enough on its own. So if you feel the need to somehow make up for this...you could ante up for a more expensive/nicer Christmas gift..but I would just make it a Christmas gift...with no indication of you trying to make up for the wedding gift oops.
I'll be honest with you. After a year and a half that I was married, I couldnt tell you who gave me what gift and who didnt. And honestly, if someone didnt give a gift..that was ok with me too. I wanted my friends and family there to celebrate with me a special time. If they didnt give a gift...so what...I was happy they came to be part of such a special day.
So I say...let it go. If it ever comes up...simply explain what happened. Perhaps not the most proper to do etiquette wise..but that is what I would do at this point in time.
Good luck to you. And on your upcoming wedding as well.
2007-11-21 15:26:55 · answer #2 · answered by Renee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Send a nice card and a gift card- Don't worry about timing or any of that the wedding and the first year of marriage is so crazy thats the last thing they were probably worried about- and after all this time if you maild something they wouldn't be like "gee I can't believe she just now gave us a gift she would be like "Jack pot wooo hooo I just got a friggen gift card see you later I'm going shopping
2007-11-21 15:13:23 · answer #3 · answered by jet75 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You don't owe them anything. You failed to give her a wedding gift - that's the past and you can't change it. Give them a nice gift at Christmas as you'd give anyone else, and get on with your life.
2007-11-21 15:50:27 · answer #4 · answered by monicanena 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the first two answers completely... Either one would be perfect.
Just be honest about it! :)
2007-11-21 15:13:38 · answer #5 · answered by BTB{06.22.09} 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would give them an anniversary gift
2007-11-21 14:41:28 · answer #6 · answered by hitchnj 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
glasss
2007-11-22 03:51:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋