Is it right to let neighbor kids just walk into our home?

Question

I'm the new step mom.

My husbands childrens friends just walk in at all hours without knocking. I'm not dressed sometimes, in the shower or it just scares me to find someone there.

I asked them to make them knock and was told his friends are like family they have always just walked in and always will.

Do you think this is right and how do I make it stop without being the evil stepmom?

In respose to some of the answers so far:

Boys ages 16 and 15
people walking in at 2, 3, 4 in the morning and all day when our boys are home or not

Answer 1

Wow....I have never heard of that before...

I feel its rude of people to walk into a home without knocking. I always lock the door when Im home, and the rest of the family locks the door too, so we never have problems like that. I would just have a family meeting a nicely tell the family that your not comfortable with people walking in and out of the house without you knowing. Good Luck !

Answer 2

If your husband was the one who told you that this is the way it will always be, then it doesn't sound like you have much of a relationship.

Beyond that, my mom NEVER tolerated people being in her house when no one else was there when we were younger. The kids aren't the ones to make the decisions in the household, new marriage or not. If your new kids aren't going to listen to you, then I agree with the others and say talk to the other parents. If you tell them that you don't like people barging into your house, and please knock, I dont see why parents woulnd't support that. If they are raising well-mannered kids, they should respect the rules of the home, whether they are new rules or old rules. Also, lock the door or change the locks if the whole neighborhood has a key. Being at home sometimes means being alone and having quiet, family time. If you don't get that respect in your own home, things need to change.

Answer 3

Hi,
I think that all should have a right to some privacy in their own home.

My front door is only opened to visitors upon either knowing them well, family, freinds, and folks with a valid reason for calling in.
I don't think that you should be seen as an evil "stepmom" for simply locking a door to all and sundry.
It is anyway a wise precaution.

Heck, I leave the doors open to all if I am having a summer BBQ or whatever in the back garden, but when living in London, I had two locked doors between me and the street.

Depends on circumstanses, then I suppose.
Children, mine too, will naturally take liberties for granted, and the day I gave my eldest son a key to access our house was a great step forwards.

Bob

Answer 4

If I were you I would talk to your husband first and have him know how important this is to you for the simple fact that you sometimes aren't dressed yet when kids come over and make a family rule that friends are welcomed over but that they must knock before coming in. After you have support and understanding from your husband I would then sit the kids down and tell them the new rule and have your husband in on that part and have him enforce it.

Answer 5

I know what it's like to be the new step-mom, you feel you don't want to sound like the evil step-mom, however it is your home too so the rules must be made but by the father. At least that keeps you out of it. Once their used to you then you can expect certain things to be done and they have to listen too you, as well as the father. If you don't work it out the marriage won't last. You can even take blended family classes just to see where you fit into new family.

Answer 6

It kind of depends on your family's relationship with the neighbors.. If you are a newcomer to the household and things have been going in some way for quiet a while, then I guess a big part of the change should be from your side.
First, I would suggest that since you have children bringing their friends in all the time, I would rather walk with my clothes on while I'm at home.
Other than that, I don't see a reason why you wouldn't want your children's friends playing at your house.. If you do not want them for no exact reason, then you ARE an evil stepmom

Answer 7

You did not say if they have keys or not, But I would think that you would always want to keep your doors locked regardless of them walking in with out knocking. You never know who else might just want to walk in and rob you or worse.

Answer 8

in accordance with my previous journey as a veterinary assistant, and as a humane worker, take your dogs to the vet to have her checked. additionally, touch regulation enforcement. Animal abuse isn't a humorous tale, or a infantile prank. little ones who abuse animals statistically advance as much as be violent adults. (And next time they might outright kill your domestic dog.) the reality that the mum is guffawing on the subject of the region, makes me think of the little ones may be in an abusive domicile. additionally, be very careful that your animals are in no way out of your sight. human beings like it is generally vindictive (whether you do no longer document the incident). one among my brother’s domestic canines grew to become into stomped to loss of lifestyles via a neighbor because of the fact the guy’s son wished it. fortunately a humane society member happened to be walking in the area and observed it take place and that they've been in a position to prosecute. via that element the guy grew to become into in penal complex on yet another offense. additionally, your neighbor’s dogs should not be working loose on human beings’s sources. maximum places have leash regulations. you will possibly desire to document their dogs working at great additionally. remember if their dogs comes onto your sources and one among your canines injures it, there is an probability they are in a position to nonetheless have you ever charged, so that's for you, and your canines’ very own protection. additionally, do no longer increase the region. do no longer provide her any reason to document you. good good fortune.

Answer 9

NO, this is not okay. Have a serious, heart-to-heart talk with your husband. What if you're there alone, showering and some little kid sees you naked. They go home, tell mom and dad and suddenly YOU look like a bad person for being naked in front of their kid.

Your doors should be locked and visitors allowed in ONLY when they are asked in.

Answer 10

Don't you lock your door? Locking your door not only keep the kids out, it might even save your life.....a rapist/murderer might walk in and rape/kill you. This is such a small problem that you can handle by just locking your doors. I find your question immensely weird and puzzling. If you can't keep out a few kids, imagine what else you can't keep out.