now i'm starting to get the same feelings i got before i broke up with my other ex's and i really love this guy but i cant decide if i'm thinking of breaking up with him for a good reason or because of stupid excuses i'm making up.
reasons i want to break up:
-hes SO clingy! ALL my boyfriends turn out to be so clingy i'm so sick of it.
-he worries about me WAY too much. (i got a msg on my cell of him saying "i'm really worried, maybe you got lost on the way to your bff's house i dotn know pleas call me i'm so worried) becuase i turned off my cell phone for an hour!
-he tells me i'm his everything 1000 times a day, i know its sweet but not when its every other word.
-he doesnt understand that i have depression adn sometimes i'm going to be sad for no reason, its not his fault and he just has to give me space.
-HE NEVER GIVES ME SPACE. i hardley see my friends now!
-HE WHINES ABOUT EVEYTHING. litterly, when i dotn want to see him for a day, maybe to hang with friends, he whines so much
2007-11-21 04:51:24 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My first love, chris, was obsessivly clingy, and controling when it came to my lifestyle of drinking ans staying out late and such.
eventually his clingyness wore me out and i grew to dispise him, so i broke up with him, but never gave him a solid reason, because well, i couldnt say that he made me hate him!.
my second boyfriend mike, was clingy too but expressed it well, in non controling ways, like telling me discreetly when he's worried. i broke up with him for no reason, i just had problems with myself. we've dated twice, almost got back together a third time but i decided nothiong has changed, (the second time we broke up was me for no reason again).
2007-11-21 04:51:55 · update #1
If they are good reasons to you, I mean it is your choice and your decision on being happy. If they don't make you happy and aren't giving you what you need, you are certainly free and entitled to move on, and explore your options. Don't be so hard on yourself, clinginess can get old quickly and if you are young and like to hang out with your friends still and aren't quite ready to settle down, that is okay. At least you aren't marrried to someone and still trying to be free. SO I say that these feelings are valid, but ultimately the decision is up to you. Good luck
2007-11-21 04:57:08 · answer #1 · answered by ?? yaddajean ?? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not your match by far.Yeah, you definitly need time and space.
Whiny&Clingy= ex-boyfriend material.
Now you can EXHALE....
All the best and get to know guys as friends first without jumping into the deep end first.
Why is it they turn out to be the same i.e clingy?
Maybe at first you've been flattered by all the concern and attention ,but when they become possessive you run? Just athought.
It may be an idea to work through your depression first because you don't want relationships just based on sympathy.
2007-11-21 05:06:26 · answer #2 · answered by Mercede's Lamp 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If a guy is that clingly then you should def. break up or have a VERY serious conversation with him. My bf was the same exact way when we got together 4 years ago. OMG he drove me CRAZY. He would call and IM and everytime I was hanging out with guy friends or even guys AND girls he would be freaking out. Not PO'd, just worried I was going to cheat on him or not come back online when I told him I was going to. He did this for like 2 years and finally I had a serious conversation with him that if he kept it up I would break up with him and never talk to him again. He worked on it and he's a lot better now, yes he's still worried I might find another guy or what not but he doesn't sit over my shoulder when I talk to someone (I now live with him) or want to look at my emails like he use to. We're still both working on trust for eachother, but if you rly care for someone u will try to work things out.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, if you rly care for the guy then stick it out and TALK TO HIM. If he scares you with his obsessive ways and such then get rid of him. There are a lot of fish in the sea, thats for sure.
I wish you good luck!
2007-11-21 04:58:42 · answer #3 · answered by manch8582 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you really love this guy? You actually sound a lot like me, 10 years ago...lol. Its great in the beginning, but then it sucks. You just need to think about it, before you take the leap, but really, you're the only one who knows if you should break up with him. Any guy who truly cares about you is going to worry about you. At this point, to be honest, I'd do anything to have my husband care enough to even call me, so which do you prefer? Its sort of an all or nothing game.
2007-11-21 04:56:47 · answer #4 · answered by ~Jenn~ 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you aren't happy then break up with him. If you want to try to work it out then first tell him you need your space (but seriously, sit him down and tell him) guys don't always hear what we say, we have to make sure there are no other distractions. Tell him how you feel (again) if he can't respect your wishes there is probably someone out there that is better for you. Life is too short to be unhappy.
2007-11-21 04:54:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well i dont blame you if you are feelign suffocated....This guy has got to back off...and you need to have a talk with him...If he just cannot do it then he has got to go... there is a pattern here....you have to maintain your sense of freedom from day 1 with these guys...Do not become each others everything right away... Im not saying you are doing it..but maintain some distance.
Its very nice to know someone cares but its almost obsessive/compulsive... Talk to your man.
2007-11-21 04:58:17 · answer #6 · answered by kakeydec 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you really love him, let him know how you feel and give him reassurance. There's obviously underlying reasons why he is so overprotective. Find out why! Did someone important in his life leave or did a girlfriend leave him at some time that really messed him up?
Just keep reassurring him and let him know you need time to yourself and with your friends, that's what makes for a healthy relationship
2007-11-21 04:56:00 · answer #7 · answered by jstchel 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
not to be mean or anything but i think your just not ready for a relationship.
but okay it is really sweet when ur bf tells you your his everything i mean who wouldnt love that?? but if you just get sick of it then its like his NOT your everything..his just a guy that you probaby have fun with..and the best thing to do is break up with him.
it is annoying when ur bf is so controlling n thats not good i mean they can protect you and stuff but no over protect you because thats why you have hands and legs to defend yourself.
its probably gonna hurt him if you break up with him so just do it in a nice way and later dont start flirting with him because then his gonna get ideas that you want to be with him and if thats not true your gonna break his heart.
hope you make the best decision
2007-11-21 04:58:29 · answer #8 · answered by Sofia 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would take them bois in a heartbeat. Learn to appreciate havin sumone that cares about u at least. I think u need 2 work out issues within urself be4 u decide to be in anymore relationships. And if u break up wit this guy, i think he deserves a reason because u really hurt them when u dont tell them wat tha problem was.
2007-11-21 05:01:23 · answer #9 · answered by â?¥Mz_Kim_2Uâ?¥ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yeah ye should break up. it's not that good to be so dependent on someone else. it would be for his own sake.
and maybe in a little while ye could sort something out.
but it just seems like you need space and time and if you continue to go out with this guy, you're not gonna get that and that's bad for you! :(
i hope you're ok!
good luck!
2007-11-21 04:56:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋