How would you deal with this person?

Question

I am on a committee where the leader likes to delegate tasks to others but then won't allow any of us to just do our jobs. He makes sure that he's right there next to each of us when we make any decision. I am meant to arrange a lunch for our group (this is the job he gave me) and I asked him the basics of info that I would need to get the job done such as when, where, how many, do people have dietary restictions. He gave me the info and has since over ruled every decision I have made. I found a great company that would bring to our venue nice platters of fruit, sandwiches, soups, and cakes and he came in right as I was booking it and told me I should use another company. How should I respond to this person? He isn't my boss just a co-worker who has taken the committee head job on for themselves. I don't want to be rude but I think that once a job is delegated that person should be left to get on with it without having some one looking over their shoulder.

Answer 1

Ideal opportunity for using passive aggressive manouvers for what they are designed for.
When he gives you a job, write it out in dot points. Next show it to the committee as soon as possible, and ask if they want to make any suggestions. Don't let him put this off. And then state "so if we all agree, then I am okay to start?".
Now you have the 'floor', reiterate that you will now go ahead and do this, and looking at him directly, tell him you feel comfortable doing it by yourself.
Upon leaving the 'floor', let everyone know that if anyone wants to make any small suggestions then it can be done by email... not phone. Just delete them.
When he comes to check on you, and hopefully others are around him, say to him that you are doing what is on the list now and to change it will take to much time. If he pressures you, say to him, "shouldnt changes to my agreed task be discussed at a committee meeting?" And then the cruncher, say "Look, I really have enjoyed receiving this responsibility to carry out this task, and really want to carry through what was agreed upon. Trust me (his name)", and pat him on the hand or if you are taller than him, on the shoulder!
At the end of the day you need to assert control over him, and physical touch will normally do it, as i would say he is a product of an over protective mother. Trust me! : ))
Remember, just because you are part of a committee, doesn't mean under law you cannot be held liable for any of your actions. Stand up for yourself. Use the companys you want. I would say other peope probably feel the same way you do. And next time, you head the committee. Use him to do everything and when he hesitates, pat him on the shoulder and say your such a lovely boy. Get my drift?
Good luck Tiger!

Answer 2

Speak to other people on the committee and see if they are experiencing the same issues you have with him. If they do, band together to elect another person that can delegate the tasks.

Skip the silly power play this guy is doing. In the end, this person is keeping everyone from doing their jobs properly. That's the issue to focus on.

Answer 3

If this person were your boss, the answer would be simple: Do whatever they want since the final responsibility would fall on them, but this person you are talking about is a peer who is taking charge.
You'll need to protect yourself by talking with the boss. Make sure you are both on the same page. Explain to the boss what is going on and that it is frustrating.
Ask the boss if this person has the boss' authority to make decisions for the company.
Make sure you are clear with the boss.

Answer 4

I think you should take your c-worker aside and ask if the problem is a recognition one. Ask him if he wants all the glory? If this is the case then inform him that all the glory takes all the work. Also inform him that to delegate inherently implies the authority to create. Gladly offer to allow him to take the resposibility back, and let him know that for future reference he can just not look to you for anymore group project help. If this does not work then i would suggest contacting your supervisor or take back the authority your group has allotted him. If he wasn't put in charge by your boss then someone has led him to believe he is indispensable to the running of the group, take a census of the others in your work group and see if you all can come to an agreement on whom should approach him.

Answer 5

so he's not in a leadership position at all, i mean beside the position he has given himself? i would pull him aside and clearly state that: "I don't want to be rude but I think that once a job is delegated that person should be left to get on with it without having some one looking over their shoulder."

he's a co-worker. if he fights you on this or doesn't change, take it higher up. sounds like you're not the only one who feels this way.

Answer 6

OK there are several approaches. Some of these work - but if this is indeed WORK related - there will be repercussions - that may cost you promotions etc.

First, DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. GET MINUTES, RECIEPTS, ETC. COVER YOUR BEHIND!!!!

Next, discuss the situation with your boss. Make sure she is aware of the way you are delegated a task - and then it's summarily taken away from you by the Bully. Ask for her advice as to what to do about it. Ask her to discuss the matter with Bully's boss as well.

NOW THEN - and this is the difficult thing - your boss MAY just pat you on the shoulder and tell you to get over it. If that's the case, then do precisely what she says and get over it. Let Bully take over. BUT DOCUMENT HIS ACTIONS so that when things blow up as they usually do because Bully can't do everything and often makes mistakes that someone else has to fix - YOU won't get the blame.

IF your boss gives you advice on how to handle a bully - follow it. Document everything - but follow what she says to do.

IFyou have a great boss who is willing to talk to Bully's boss, then count your lucky stars.

Even if your boss says to handle it any way you feel, make sure you document that statement -

Then, go to Bully's boss and explain the situation. Ask HIS advice on how to handle Bully - follow it.

If you're given the (documented) go-ahead to put Bully in his place, then do so.

Politely but firmly - in a public setting such as a committee meeting - accept his assignments with the condition - and put this in the minutes - that he will assign tasks and then leave people alone to complete them on time and within budget - without interference from him. Make sure this is in the minutes. No arguing, no explaining, no nothing.

Simply state "Joe, I will take on the task of arranging for a catered lunch to be brought into the meeting at 12:00 per your request under the condition that as long as I am within the allotted $100 budget, I will have complete control over the arrangements. I will require the following information from you in a timely fashion: Number of attendees, dietary requirements, location, date and time. Please make sure I am given this information by Day/Date/Time."

If he argues or tries to bully you - then you can say, "Joe, I am more than qualified to make these arrangements, however if you feel someone else would be a better choice, please, by all means, appoint them to complete this task."

Do this with every task he delegates to you. I will complete this task on time and within budget under the condition that I am given complete control over it.

Usually bullies back down when someone calls them to task.

Just make sure that it's in the minutes and that he and everyone else knows that he may delegate a task - as a leader should - but then, as a leader should, leave people alone to complete their tasks.

Then when he starts to horn in on your work - show him the minutes and explain that he agreed to leave you alone and abide by your decisions.

He won't like it - Bully will be cornered and feel threatened - and may complain to others - which is why you went to both your and his bosses in the first place.

Again, I can't stress documentation enough. AND I cannot stress speaking with your boss about the situation ahead of time. Make sure you have her support - because Bully will surely make waves - and that could cost you in the long run. Trust me. That could easily cost you in the long run.

Answer 7

If he isn't your boss you need to go to your boss and ask him/her how much power this person has over you to tell you how to do your job. If the answer is none then grab the ball and run with it and forget what he is saying. If he tells you how to do things just smile and nod and wait for him to leave the area and finish what you were doing then. Let him have the belief that he is in charge unless your boss wants to put him in his place but that is up to the boss let him decide. Ask the boss how they would like you to handle it.

Answer 8

Next time he tried to butt into a task that he delegated to you, I'd smile sweetly and say "Oh, I thought you wanted me to do that. Go ahead and take it over though - is there anything else I can do as long as you're handling this?" If he says he still wants you to do it, then tell him to let you do it. It's a waste of time for you both to do it. Good luck!

Answer 9

Tell him if he wants to run the whole show then he can. And see how fast he bows out when he has no help at all. Sounds like he just wants to boss others around and not do all the work himself.

Answer 10

Once you get the task,go into your office,LOCK the door and make your decision and carry it out. If this person tries to interfere,then inform him/her that the decision has been made and the food was already ordered. TOUGH COOKIES!