We're very much in love, things have been gold for years now. We looked at rings a few weeks ago. I'm committed to this. I love her and I love our life together. The problem is that I have this amoral approach to sexuality and I want this other girl very badly. I still think I should marry my girl. But I don't think I'll always be faithful.
2007-11-20 19:30:37 · 44 answers · asked by Ginseng 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
please don't marry her....shes better off alone. If you love her let her go and find someone that will be true to her. You will hurt her so bad if you cheat on her and you will definitely lose your chance of marrying her. Big mistake it sounds like you are afraid of commitment and not at all ready to get married. Quit leading her on.
2007-11-20 19:34:40 · answer #1 · answered by ☠ ☠ ☠ 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Do NOT get married!
If you want this other girl very badly now when things are so great with your girlfriend, and you have an immoral approach to sexuality, then there will always be another girl you want very badly. Your girlfriend will find out eventually and you will have devastated her. She deserves better than that! If you care at all about her you would want better than that for her!
I suspect that you have issues with sex and commitment. I don't think you necessarily have an immoral approach to sexuality, but that you need to seek counseling to find out why you have the desire to cheat when it appears everything is fine in your relationship. Or you just don't know what true love, marriage, and commitment means.
When you think about cheating, think about your girlfriend finding out...think about how hurt she'll be, how she will look at you differently, feel differently toward you, and not trust you. Think about possibly losing the life you have, and claim to love, with her. If that doesn't persuade you to stay faithful, you aren't ready for marriage.
2007-11-20 19:40:19 · answer #2 · answered by Nonny0928 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's very noble of you to want to change; be true to your girl. If my man cheated on me, believe me, I'd know. I wouldn't stay with a guy who cheated. Do you remember when Donald Trump cheated on Ivana with Marla Maples? Some girls will phone your g/f or wife n say "I just had sex with your husband" then laugh in her face. That's what Marla Maples did at the ski resort when she confronted Ivana Trump. It broke up the marriage... immediately. Getting promiscuious girls to have sex with you is very easy, I imagine.
The only thing that can break a "sexual addiction" is to seek after God and ask him to set you free from the addiction. You can also get counseling, but the spiritual deliverance is much more effective, and lasting.... if you really are diligent about it. The best and wisest approach is to combine them both. May not be the answer you wanted, but nothing else really gets results. I really think your g/f will be understanding and patient with you in this treatment but if she catches you cheating, that could end your relationship for good.
2007-11-20 19:46:43 · answer #3 · answered by wildflower 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ginseng...Dude...my first response was grow up. And then I thought about this for a bit and realized that this woman has been dealing with you and your self centered focus for years. Ask her what she thinks about a man that is engaged to a wonderful woman and is seeing someone on the side. If she thinks that having someone on the side is fine, then go for it. But be prepared for her to have some extra curricular activities as well. By definition a betrothal is to commit to someone, as in marriage.If you are willing to consider involving yourself, even sexually, with another woman in a period of engagement, then one would assume that you would consider involving yourself with someone else, even sexually, when married. If your beloved can not give you what you need sexually now, it is not likely to get any better later. Do both of you a favor and think about what you really want for the rest of your life. If it is to have the woman of your dreams wearing your ring and the woman of your desire meeting you for some on the side, you need to find two people that are okay with that up front. And, oh yea, I'm sure that you just have this incredible drive that she can't keep up with. Did it ever occur to you that maybe you just aren't doing it for her?
2007-11-20 19:48:52 · answer #4 · answered by Debra W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating has always been a bad idea. What goes around comes around. If you don't want to be cheated by your beloved girlfriend stay clear with other women radar. You can never cheat someone you're in love with coz she's like a part of you. If you still have the urge to cheat with another girl, I think you're really not yet too committed. Evaluate yourself. Know what you will gain in shagging another girl vs. losing your girlfriend. Weigh things by then you will know what is more important, your heart or your libido.
2007-11-20 19:50:54 · answer #5 · answered by Snowy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you realy want to cheat on the person you say you love and want to mary, I am sorry but you shouldn't mary them it wouldn't be fare, I mean what would they think if they read this? When I fell in love with my fiance he was the only person I could see, I thought of no one else, when people would say to me don't you think that guys hot I would reply I didn't notice. No one could take my eyes or heart away from the one person I loved. So no if you are openly asking,and admitting that you don't think you can be faithful then you should not get married because she may not be the ONE?
When you find the one,you'll know, because she will be the only one you think about day and night!
2007-11-20 19:46:56 · answer #6 · answered by Miss Opinionated 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get married you will hurt her in the long run if you say that you love her then you need to protect her as a man so protect her from yourself by playing open cards telling her that this is what you see the marriage to her will be like you cheating and not being true too her
But my question to you is why do you want to lead a life so full of pain that you created yourself why don't you just want to be happy?
2007-11-20 21:11:53 · answer #7 · answered by janice m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Knowing this, you either don't love her or more likely, don't have a clue what real love is or you wouldn't be asking her to marry you already knowing you are going to hurt her horribly. THEN, what if she no longer loves YOU? Give that some thought the next time she is smiling at you with love in her eyes. Cheat and consider that look erased forever more.
2007-11-20 19:36:28 · answer #8 · answered by 8 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG!! I have always said that if you truly and i mean TRULY, love someone, then you will never have a second thought or a random thought about anyone! If you love her as much as you say you do, and think you will cheat on her, then you probably need to let her go.... I hate to say that, but it's true.... When you love someone completely, there will never be any doubt that you yourself, will be completely faithful. But you have to make that decision. Good luck. I wish you the best.
2007-11-20 19:36:23 · answer #9 · answered by Ambah 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hi, Do not cheat and get married. I am not going to swear and curse at you, but i mean, just approach you wife and discuss about your sex life, do not be unfaithful. Marry her, and be faithful. Marriage is a life long commitment. Cheating is not an option. Think about it, If you cheat and she is your wife, then there will be a messy divorce and a hell of a lot of bills! Just don't cheat is my honest non judgmental answer.
I once saw this saying..
"If you love her, let her know.
If you don't just let her go!"
Hope this helped!
2007-11-20 19:34:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
you need to really re think this marriage because if your going to be unfaithful it will end up in tears, you need to ask your fiancee if she is into open relationships if she is grand but don't go messing up someone Else's life when you know your going to do something like that. How would you feel if she went of with another man and you found out. Very rarely is the grass greener on the other side
2007-11-20 19:35:34 · answer #11 · answered by dawson_brister 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋