How do I talk to my mom if she is very sensitive?

Question

My mom is a very sensitive person when it comes to anything. And i've been dating my boyfriend for a year now and want to move out and in with him. Im 21 years old and very responsible. But everytime I bring it up with my mom she starts crying and we can never finish talking. How should I bring this up with her? Or should I just move out and let her feelings go wild. I need help and don't want to hurt my mom. Thanks anyone.!

Answer 1

If you can't finish talking with her what about putting your feelings into writing? That way you can say what you need to without the interruption or distraction of her crying or other things coming up.

I'd start and end the note by telling her how much you love her and how important she is to you and how she will always be a big part of your life.

Best wishes and good luck.

Answer 2

Hello I am a mom and so I know how she feels you always worry about your kids and want the best for them and we sometimes let that cloud our judgment. But you are 21 years old and can make your own decisions about your life even if you make a mistake you will learn from that mistake.We all make them no matter what the age. I am quite sure your mom has made a few , I would suggest since you can not talk to her then write her a letter and really explain to her how you feel that you don't want to hurt her and that she has been a good mother but you have to live your own life but that she did a good job in teaching you, and you know she wants you to be happy. She will always be your mom no one can change that .We parents have a hard time sometime cutting those apron strings she will be ok hon. Happy Holidays

Answer 3

Your mom is upset for good reason.
You say you are responsible but you are about to do a VERY irresponsible thing.
Most young people jump right into sex the first date, then move in the next week then get pregnant, then the fun begins.
It isnt long before she is calling the cops, or he is leaving and staying the night elsewhere because he cant stand her anymore, etc.
It takes TIME to get to really know someone and you CAN AND should do this without shacking.
Why?
How many times I have read on here and seen and heard in real life, young girls your age 6 months pregnant complain BITTERLY about the b/f they made a baby with, and then added,"if I had it all to do over again....".
The fact is they took a stupid risk before getting to know the guy.Many times they see a guy who "looks" like prince charming and ignore ALL the warning signs, go into denial until they cant avoid reality anymore then assume because he loves her he will WANT to change.
When it is all said and done they end up being another welfare mom.
Date for a yr ,no more sex and then afterwards talk about marriage.If he doesnt want to marry you, tell him thats ok, no sex until he does.You will find out real quick what he is all about.

Answer 4

Hmmm. It sounds like perhaps your Mom is relying on you for friendship and companionship, instead of understanding that she needs to play the role of "mother". I'm wondering if she is single and so she allows you to fill some of the void that a husband would normally fill. Does she confide in you about her problems, talk to you about people at work, etc? Does she tell you her deepest fears or her hopes and dreams...expect you to listen to her when she is troubled, provide her with company on errands or trips to the mall or out to eat? If so, then she is not allowing you the freedom to be with your peers and to live your life. If this is the case, you have to free yourself from this lifestyle. It's not fair to you - your Mom needs to find some friends or a boyfriend (maybe a girlfriend) whatever. It can't be you. Do you understand what I'm saying? This is an unnatural situation for you to be in. You are 21 and any normal Mom would feel grateful that you are growing up and leaving the nest. Maybe just pack up a few things and leave in the middle of the night, then face the music later with your boyfriend to give you support. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.

Answer 5

You're 21. You can legally drink alcohol, go out, drive, and you are an adult with responsibilities. Your mother should have had some premonition that you would have a boyfriend and leave one day. She can't restrain you forever. Sit her down, maybe WITH your boyfriend there, and explain to her that you guys are very serious, and very in love, and you want to move in together. Tell her you need her support, and even though you won't be in her household, you will still visit and keep in touch. She has to let go sometime.

Answer 6

Just tread carefully.Write your mum a letter expalining about how you feel. At some stage you wil move on.I am a sensitive person but one day my daughter will move on not until she is financially ready with a job.Moving in with your boyfriend is a huge thing.All your mum will want is to make sure you are okay.

Answer 7

write her a letter and tell her when you will be home and you two can talk about it then. this way she has time to read it a few times and absorb what your saying. let her know you love her and will take a day out of the week to spend with her for a few hours or you will call to check on her but your moving on.

Answer 8

OMG>>>
dont let her control ur life. u r 1lrdy 21. think about it. r u gonna wait till u r 30 orr even 40 till shes gone to get married?
if u think u r respnsible, u should do it. if she starts crying u need to keep talking. i know that u r a smart person who cares alot about ur parets, unlike me, LOL
but u NEED to get over this. u r responsible!!!!!
dont let ur MOM control ur life. u need to break loose!!!!!!

Answer 9

please don't move in with him unless you know you love him. it's a bad choice.
good luck and God be with you