I'm getting married in a few years and I am choosing to walk down alone, I dont want the father daughter dance at the reception, but what if my fiance wants to dance with his mom? Do you think that's disrespectful to my father? I'm confused, I dont want to offend my dad, but I'm not close to him so i dont want to be walked down the aisle nor do I want to dance with him. Help!
2007-11-20 12:53:34 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Talk to your fiance and find out how much he wants to dance with his mom at the reception. I do think it would look awkward to have a mother-son dance and not a father-daughter dance if your father is in attendance at the wedding. It would probably hurt your father's feelings, and the omission would be obvious to most guests. If you explain your situation to your fiance, chances are he will be okay with the idea of not doing a traditional mother-son dance (usually men are not as picky about what happens at their wedding as women are). Perhaps he can just make sure to dance with his mother during one of the early dances when guests are also on the dance floor.
What is your reason for not wanting to formally include your father in the ceremony or reception? I do understand this desire if your father has not lived up to his fatherhood responsibilities -- for example, if he left your family when you were young, mistreated you in some way, or is divorced from your mother and didn't really raise you at all. Then it is perfectly appropriate not to want to include him as anything other than a guest.
However, if he did raise you and didn't mistreat you, but you just aren't as close to him as you wish you had been, perhaps you should find some way to honor him as your father at the reception. That doesn't mean he needs to walk you down the aisle; many brides are choosing to walk down the aisle alone now-a-days. Perhaps you can do the father-daughter dance after all, or just have him give a toast along with the honor attendants.
Only you know what your family situation is like and what would be appropriate based on your relationship. Best wishes to you and your fiance!
2007-11-20 22:44:20 · answer #1 · answered by Emmy Jo (13 weeks with #2) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im not close with my dad either. and ill be in the same boat in about a year. im either having my mom walk me down the aisle or my brother.
and as for the father daughter dance IF he shows up, i would like to have it. even though he left us when i was 3 and i see him MAYBE 3 times a year...i would still like to have that father daughter dance everyone else has, and i also dont want him to feel bad.
but if u really dont want the father daughter dance, u dont have to. if ur boyfriend wants to dance with his mom...maybe u culd dance with ur grandfather, or brother, or step dad. or even a bridesmaid if u really want to. its ur wedding, u can do it however u want.
2007-11-20 15:41:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your wedding! So do it the way that you want. Your special wedding day is all about you, not your father. If you don't feel comfortable walking down the aisle or dancing with him, then dont. I sure wouldn't. You've just got one shot at this so do what makes you happiest! Good luck!
2007-11-20 13:41:14 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's disrespectful to skip the father daughter dance. If your fiance wants to dance with his mom let him. Make sure to explain to your dad in advance that you will nto be having the father daughter dance because it makes you uncomfortable, or simply say that you don't want to do it.
It's your wedding and you can have or not have pretty much anything. If you really don't want that dance, then skip it!
2007-11-20 13:18:47 · answer #4 · answered by Reba 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi Erin:
You most certainly do NOT have to dance with your father if you don't want. And walking down the aisle by yourself is perfectly acceptable.
If your groom wants to dance with his mom....fine. No big deal. My daughter-in-law did NOT dance with her father. She danced with her mother .....the one that brought her up!!
2007-11-20 16:11:18 · answer #5 · answered by iloveweddings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your wedding..your special day...many young women do this....I walked my daughter down the aisle(mom) and of course no dance....However her dad was not in the picture. I guess your mom and dad are married....treat this carefully....Best wishes
2007-11-20 13:28:19 · answer #6 · answered by wilma s 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If MY wife didn't want her dad to walk her down the aisle, she sure as hell wouldn't dance with him....It's your wedding...unless of course your dad is paying for it...
2007-11-20 13:09:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way around that is to eliminate the Mother/Son too. otherwise people will wonder why you didn't dance with your dad.
2007-11-20 15:51:12 · answer #8 · answered by Ann D 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My dad and I are close but we didn't do it. He doesn't dance and I didn't think it was that crucial. Your husband doesn't need to dance with his mother.
2007-11-20 13:46:18 · answer #9 · answered by Luv2Answer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that fine if u wont but don't try to stop ur fiance from dancing with his mom
2007-11-20 13:04:01 · answer #10 · answered by Healing for My Soul 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋