Please Help Me!!!! I'm So Confused With Everything!!!!!!!!?

Question

okay, I still have strong feelings for my ex. We were very close and knew everything about each other and were so in love and had so much fun together. Anyway, about 3 months ago we broke up because we were forced to(he got grounded) and I later found a new bf. Soon after my ex told me that he was waiting to get off grounding to go back out with me again but he saw that I had someone new.
A few weeks later, my ex started dating his old ex again, but quickly broke up with her because he said he didn't want to date anyone right now.
Now I just found out that he has a new girlfriend, and I am crushed because I still love him!! I don't know what to do!!! I want him back!!

Anyway, today I just broke up with my bf (the one my ex saw that i was dating) because I felt we were just friends and I still liked my ex! Now he has a gf! What do I do? I'm so confused!!! How do I get over him when I want him back!!!
Is he just a player and doesn't know what he wants or what?! Please help me!!!!!

Answer 1

From the details it's clear that you are young, at least not out of high school. I noticed that a lot of people that answered said that you couldn't know what love is and that you should get over it. What they basically said is that since you are younger than they are, your feelings aren't important. I know that your feelings are very real, and that you can't "just get over it." Here's some advice that should be more helpful to you.

Since you are both young, he probably isn't going to marry this new girlfriend anytime soon, so you can afford to wait. Chances are that the relationship will not last. That's because this time of your life is for social learning. You date lots of people to find out what kind of people you like. You are also finding out what kind of person you want to be. As your opinions change, the kind of guys that you date will too. While you are waiting for him to end his current relationship, do some more dating yourself. But, if I may make a suggestion, ditch the idea of a boyfriend. When you attach yourself to someone you immediately limit yourself. Instead of entering an exclusive relationship with someone, try to meet lots of different guys. This doesn't mean you are a player. A player is someone who leads people (many people) on by making them all think that they are #1. Make it clear when you go out with a guy that you are just interested in having fun, that you don't need someone to cling to just to survive. It's funny, but when guys find this out, it makes them even more attracted to you. They will be attracted to your fun-loving attitude, your independence, your confidence. Guys hate girls that are clingy and insecure.

Look at it another way. Imagine that you get to buy a house, but you have to live in for the rest of your life. Which would make more sense, 1) spending months trying out the first 2 or 3 houses you see, or 2) looking at as many houses as you can, and spending a little more time with those that most appeal to you? There are MILLIONS more guys in this world than the ones you know now. If you only looked for places to live in a trailer park, and then picked the best one, you would miss out on all the fancy houses and mansions on the next street. Do you get the idea?

I have several friends who had ONE boyfriend through all of high school. If their boyfriend didn't want to do something on a Friday night or didn't have money for the prom, then they sat at home. They were restricted by that one person. By the time they graduated they only knew what they liked and didn't like about one kind of guy, whereas I went on dozens of dates in high school and later college, and met many different kinds of guys. None of my friends married the guy they dated in high school. They ended up breaking up because of their changing interests. But because my friends weren't secure enough to survive without a boyfriend for very long, they got into another relationship with the first guy they could find, and married him instead. One of my friends has two kids and is trying to work things out so she doesn't get a divorce. The other one is married to a control freak that won't let her do anything without his permission. I am happily married to a wonderful, wonderful man. It took us a long time to find each other, but it was worth it. And I had fun while looking!

Summary? Go have fun, meet lots of people. If this guy is right for you then things will work out. If things don't work out, try to learn from the experience and make your life better because of it.

Answer 2

I remember feeling the way you described, at about your age. I quit my church but kept my God. I picked a university on a whim. I took core classes and wildly varied electives. As a junior, I still wasn't sure and almost dropped out. And then, suddenly, one of those electives grabbed me. I knew at once, after years of uncertainty, what I loved. Now, 36 years later, I'm still in love with my work and hope to be doing it another 15 or 20 years. Oh yeah, along the way I found an organized religion that sufficiently augments my continuous connection to my God. Don't be scared. You have time to try and fail many times. Be strong enough to keep coming back. Find fun in the search.

Answer 3

How old are you dear? There will be many loves in your life. Don't bet everything on Mr. Wrong. Sounds like he needs to grow up, and maybe you should say goodbye, have yourself a good cry, pick yourself up and go buy a new pair of shoes or have your hair done, or go out with your girlfriends. If your ex is Mr. Right, then he'll come around. If not, forget him.

Answer 4

First try talking to him because maybe his just trying to get you jealous. And you said that he was waiting for you after he got un grounded or w.e so just talk to him and be really sincere because you have to let him know how you feel because its the only chance that you ll get and don't be worried if you look like a fool because if you really love him its worth it.But if hes totally over you(and if he says that he is make sure he has no doubts about it because you probably don't want t talk to him about it again )then just say ok i understand and don't be a pitiful about it that's just the way life is and you ll get over it even if it dosent seem like it now.But good luck!and w.e happens it happened for a reason and it was meant to be so move on with it.Good Luck again!

Answer 5

If your ex was grounded then I think that probably tells me you're too young to be thinking about your relationship with guys in this much detail. You need to concentrate more on your school work than your love life. You're not old enough to feel the real feeling of being in love.

Answer 6

Girl, you need to stop letting your life revolve around this guy! Take some "you" time enjoy being single have a good time! Don't worry about him, he only seems to want you when you are unavailable. You have many things to learn when it comes to relationships. Just because he was grounded didn't mean y'all had to break up! Seriously do a little growing before your next bf comes around!!

Answer 7

Remember Love comes softly. A speeding train is hard to catch. You need to wait till it stops and then purchase the ticket, but you must make sure the train is headed to the place you want to go. If you don't its easy to get lost in a new area. Just respect yourself and let romance lead you in the right direction, not just physical attraction.

Answer 8

yeah I'd wait a little while too. Your young and they'll be tons of guys so don't sweat it,. I'd suggest, if deciding to wait, to be open to other guys because even though it may seem like it you might fine someone you like better. And if you and your ex are meant to be together you will be so don't worry over it, just go with the flow.

Answer 9

It sounds like you can just wait a few weeks and he'll be without a girlfriend again. So, be patient, let him know how you feel, and see if you still feel that way after his current gf is gone.

Answer 10

well if you really like him i would not take my eyes off of him just wait tell the time is right if he really likes you he should come back but you cant hide in the cornor you got to let him no how you feel about him. I hope this helps you out, good luck :-)